The Next Generation and the Philosopher's Stone
by Lugless
Summary: "Harry Potter". His children, nieces and nephews, and their friends, had all seen many books about this wonderful wizard. But not ones found in a muggle bookshop, in the childrens section. And so we have another NextGen reads The Books.
1. Chapter 1: The Boy Who Lived

**AN: ****Hello. **

**I rather hope you enjoy this. Horrendously overdone – mind, most things in HP fanfiction are... but well, if I'm honest, none I've read have ever seen too good in my opinion... And there's the exact same errors in the "texts" used – IT'S BLOODY IRRITATING. NO, IT'S NOT FRED WHO SAYS "Blimey, I'm tired, think I'll go to bed and-" And all the "Mom" is annoying. It's just not right. JK is British. The Weasley's are English.  
>Only one or two have been "worthy" enough for me to enjoy truly (even though I'll still read the others) so... yeah. Hope this is more to your liking. <strong>

**OH, and of course, I only claim to get the right text. I don't claim to write better or worse than other versions of this (although hopefully mine isn't quite so unoriginal).**

**Ages: 12 – Fred Weasley II ("Freddie")  
>Roxanne Weasley<br>Hugo Weasley  
>Lily Luna Potter<br>13 – Lucy Weasley  
>14 – Albus Potter<br>Rose Weasley  
>Scorpius Malfoy<br>15 – James Potter  
>Louis Weasley<br>17 – Molly Weasley  
>Dominique Weasley<br>19 – Victoire Weasley  
>22 – Ted Lupin ("Teddy")<strong>

**I own nothing, especially not the stuff in bold. Other than ANs. **

* * *

><p>In Muggle London, two twelve year olds sprinted down a street, nimbly avoiding the hoards of people crowding the area. They both carried a bag; the girl's was a large handbag over her shoulder, the boy's was an actual rucksack, and from the sounds emerging from the bags when they were bounced, inside each were hard, heavy objects. The elder of the two ("only by an hour, Freddie!") kept checking his watch – and nearly running into shoppers as he did so.<p>

They turned a sharp corner and entered an emptier street, and some way down, they stopped to catch their breaths.

This was right outside of a small, dingy-looking pub – _The Leaky Cauldron_.

The two straightened up and the younger – the girl – dropped her bag and stared.

"Oh, bloody hell..." The boy looked at her, slightly puzzled. She pointed at the shop next to the pub.

"_Waterstones?_" He read. She nodded.

"I don't get it."

"Freddie! It's a bloody bookshop! Right next to the _Cauldron_!"

"You mean-"

"Yup."

"We wasted the entire day?"

"Yup."

"Coulda just gone next door?"

"Uhuh."

"Well. Bugger."

Together they walked into the pub, waved at the owner and the blonde girl behind the bar, whipped out their wands and - racing each other this time – tapped the brick to open Diagon Alley.

* * *

><p>Number 93, the garish shop which drew people close like bees to a honey pot – Roxanne suddenly noticed that there were actually a few giant bees hanging around the entrance – was the wonderful Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes.<p>

Roxanne and Freddie fought their way through the shop, avoided the gaze of their father (visible due to his bright red hair, bright magenta robes, and bright outlandish personality), hid from Poppy (too sensible and too down-to-Earth – but this was what George Weasley needed to work full time in the shop) made their way past the lab (even through the noise of the shop, Roxanne could hear something bubbling away in their) and finally up to the magically bigger on the inside flat which was their home.

Roxanne scrawled a hasty note on some scrap parchment, stuck it to the wall (the Ministry would never notice the Sticking Charm being used in a magical household) and she and Freddie disappeared by Floo.

_Dad – gone to Lily's, see you later  
>Roxy &amp; Freddie<br>xx_

Roxanne was pulled out of the fireplace in Grimmauld Place by her twin brother, and his force nearly sent her flying into her cousin James Potter. He grinned at them.

"The rest of them are here, 'cept for Teddy. I said I'd wait for him. Mum and Dad left me in charge-"

"-Big mistake-" interrupted Freddie.

"-Oi, and they aren't back 'til later. All the adults reckon we're having a massive sleep out like we used to."

A whooshing noise came from the fireplace, and Ted Lupin came spinning into view, his hair bright turquoise and face sooty. At twenty-twoyears old, Teddy worked in the Ministry of Magic in the Department of Magical Beings: the Body for Instigating Treaties between Creatures and Humans (Teddy loathed the moron who came up with that name).

"Great, let's go up!" Fifteen-year-old James hit Teddy around the back of the head - he'd had to jump, he'd inherited his father's height (or lack of) – and sprinted off upstairs, with Freddie and Roxanne a few steps behind.

The drawing room was filled with cushions and bean-bags, a fire was burning merrily in the fireplace, the two sofas were being climbed on by children too old, and it really was bloody noisy in this room. Many gingers of different shapes and sizes filled this room, there were a few brunettes and some blondes, one _auburn_ ("Not bloody ginger!") and one black(haired, that is). And one turquoise. The skin colour was less varied; most were very pale and freckled, with only Roxanne and Freddie having skin darker than clean sheets.

James Potter stole the attention, as always. He yelled very loudly, getting his many cousins to shut up (Victoire raised a sharp eyebrow and pulled Teddy over to her).

"Right, you lot!"

There was still a lot of muttering, as you'd expect from about fifteen kids of a variety of ages. Actually, while they were chatting, that was a good point. James did a quick head count: there was Freddy and Roxanne, fighting over a green bean bag, next to his sister Lily and cousin Hugo; Molly and Dominique were laughing over some magazine; Louis was telling rude jokes to Lucy, Scorpius and Albus; Teddy and Vic were getting cosy on the armchair; Rose was sitting cross legged in front of James, clearly feeling above the juvenile jokes of Louis, girlish giggling of Molly and Dom, and not inclined to watch Freddie and Roxanne fight or Teddy and Vic snog.

"SHUT UP!" He yelled. He could yell as well as his mother and grandmother could.

"All right, Jamie?" Teddy winked at him.

"So we finally learn why this 'meeting' is so important?" Dom asked, drying her nails with her wand.

"Freddie, Rox?" The twins looked up at him, one light brown face with possibly gingerish frizzy hair, the other much darker with almost black hair, but both looking completely absent.

"Where are the books?"

"Books?" Freddie still looked blank. Roxanne hit him and handed over two plastic bags from inside hers and Freddie's bags.

"What are _these?"_ Lucy snatched the bags and passed around the books - _Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone, Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix_ and finally _Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince._

"'Order of the Phoenix'?" Teddy said thoughtfully, pulling away from Vic momentarily. "I'm sure I've heard of that..."

"What are they?"

"Ooh, are they about Dad and why he's famous?"

"Uncle Harry seems quite a key feature of these..."

"What the bloody hell is a Philosopher's stone?"

"Freddie and Hugo snuck out to Muggle London and saw these books," Rose said sniffily, "and James decided we ought to buy them and read them together. Apparently they're about Uncle Harry's life."

"Rosie just hates that she's not read these books," grinned Albus, who knew better than to take Rose's sneering seriously.

"Oh, shut up, Al," she muttered.

"You brought us here to read some books?" scoffed Victoire.

"Yup," replied James, completely unfazed. As long as Teddy stayed, Vic would stay.

"So, what, we take it in turns to read the book out loud?" Louis raised his eyebrow.

"Well, I was thinking that... why not?" James said. There were a few more raised eyebrows, but James could tell they were intrigued.

"Says here that _Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone _is the first book," Lucy said, perusing the first few pages of the thickest, _Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix._

"Right," he said brightly, taking the first book from Scorpius and getting comfortably settled on a soft beanbag. "I'll begin then! **Chapter One: The Boy Who Lived**"

"Dramatic opening," muttered Louis.

"**Mr and Mrs Dursley, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much." **

"Pfft. Perfectly normal? Sounds perfectly dull," said Freddie. James and a few others grinned appreciatively.

"**They were the last people you'd expect to be involved in anything strange or mysterious, because they just didn't hold with such nonsense.** **Mr Dursley was the director of a firm called Grunnings, which made drills."**

"Do we need to know what a drill is?" Lily asked.

"They don't sound all that interesting if this guy works for them," replied Roxanne. This sounded quite fair, so no one pursued 'drills'.

"**He was a big, beefy man with hardly any neck, although he did have a very large moustache. Mrs Dursley was thin and blonde and had nearly twice the usual amount of neck, which came in very useful as she spent so much of her time craning over garden fences, spying on the neighbours."**

Dominique snorted. "They're not set up to be the best of characters. I'm guessing they aren't the good guys."

"**The Dursleys had a small son called Dudley, and in their opinion there was no finer boy anywhere. The Dursleys had everything they wanted, but they also had a secret, and their greatest fear was that somebody would discover it. They didn't think they could bear it if anyone found out about the Potters."**

"Oi! What's wrong with us?" Lily interrupted.

James grinned. "Well, there's Dad who's a bit of a drag, Mum's overly violent, I can't see why Mum and Dad love you, Lil, and don't get me started on Albus..."

Albus narrowed his eyes and told his brother to do something to himself which James was sure was physically impossible.

"Charming, little bro."

"**Mrs Potter was Mrs Dursley's sister, but they hadn't met for several years; in fact, Mrs Dursley pretended she didn't have a sister, because her sister and her good-for nothing husband were as unDursleyish as it was possible to be."**

"So that's Grandma and Granddad then? I think I'm glad they're 'as unDursleyish as it was possible to be'," Lily muttered.

"Think we are too, or it's likely you'd be Dursleyish too, and then we'd have to ostracize you," grinned Freddie.

"**The Dursley's shuddered to think what the neighbours would say if the Potter's arrived in the street. The Dursley's knew that the Potter's had a small son too but they had never even seen him. This boy was another good reason for keeping the Potters away; they didn't want Dudley mixing with a child like that.** **When Mr and Mrs Dursley woke up on the dull, grey Tuesday our story starts,-"**

"And starting beautifully it is," murmured Lucy who, like most of them, took an immediate dislike to the Dursleys.

"**-there was nothing about the cloudy sky outside to suggest that strange and mysterious things would soon be happening all over the country.** **Mr Dursley hummed as he picked out his most boring tie for work-"**

"If our dad did that, I think I'd get emancipated," murmured Freddie. Roxanne snorted; it was hard to imagine that George Weasley even owned a boring tie.

"**-and Mrs Dursley gossiped away happily as she wrestled a screaming Dudley into his high chair. None of them noticed a large, tawny owl flutter past the window. At half past eight, Mr Dursley picked up his briefcase, pecked Mrs Dursley on the cheek, and tried to kiss Dudley goodbye but missed, because Dudley was not having a tantrum and throwing his cereal at the walls."**

"He sounds perfectly charming," snorted Rose.

"**"Little tyke." chortled Mr Dursley as he left the house. He got into his car and backed out of number four's drive. It was on the corner of the street that he noticed the first sign of something peculiar - a cat reading a map."**

"Hey, that's not-" Molly started.

"Mol, I think most of us have an _inkling_ as to who this cat – that can read – is, given who's taught each and every one of us transfiguration," Louis replied.

"**For a second Mr Dursley didn't realise what he had seen-then he jerked his head around to look again. There was a tabby cat standing on the corner of Privet Drive, but there wasn't a map in sight."**

"That's gotta be McGonagall," said Teddy, and then added, as if an afterthought, ".Or he's cracking up."

"Both fairly plausible," muttered Albus.

"**What could he have been thinking of? It must have been a trick of the light. Mr Dursley blinked and stared at the cat. It stared back. As Mr Dursley drove around the corner and up the road, he watched the cat in his mirror. It was not reading the sign that said Privet Drive-no, looking at the sign; cats couldn't read maps or signs."**

A few people snorted.

" **Mr Dursley gave himself a little shake and put the cat out of his mind.** **As he drove around town he thought of nothing except a large order of drills he was hoping to get that day. But on the edge of town, drills were driven out of his mind by something else. As he sat in the usual morning traffic jam, he couldn't help noticing that there seemed to have a lot of strangely dressed people about. People in cloaks.** **Mr Dursley couldn't bear people who dressed in funny clothes - the getups you saw on young people! "**

Victoire snorted softly.

"**He supposed this was some stupid new fashion. He drummed his fingers on the steering wheel and his eyes fell on the huddle of these weirdoes-"**

Molly bristled. "Who does he think he's calling weirdoes?"

"The ones in cloaks, clearly," replied Lucy.

"**-standing close by. They were whispering excitedly together. Mr Dursley was enraged to see that a couple of them weren't young at all; why, that man had to be older than he was, and wearing an emerald green cloak! The nerve of him! But then it struck Dr. Dursley that this was probably some silly stunt - these people were obviously collecting for something...yes that would be it. The traffic moved on and a few minutes later, Mr Dursley arrived in the Grunnings parking lot, his mind back on drills.** **Mr Dursley always sat with is back to the window in his off on the ninth floor. If he hadn't he might have found it harder to concentrate on drills that morning. **_**He**_** didn't see the owls swooping past in broad daylight, though people down in the street did; they pointed and gazed open mouthed as owl after owl sped overhead. Most of them had never seen and owl even in nighttimes. Mr Dursley, however, had a perfectly normal, owl-free morning. He yelled at five different people."**

"Charming."

" **He made several important telephone calls and shouted a bit more."**

"Delightful."

"**He was in a very good mood until lunchtime, when he thought he'd stretch his legs and walk across the road to buy himself a bun from the bakery. He'd forgotten all about the people in cloaks until he passed a group of them next to the baker's. He eyed them angrily as he passed. He didn't know why, but the made him uneasy. This bunch was whispering excitedly, too, and he couldn't see a single collecting tin. It was on his way back past them, clutching a large doughnut in a bag, that he caught a few words of what they were saying.**

**"The Potters, that's right, that's what I heard-"**

**"-yes, their son, Harry-"**

"Ooh," Lily wiggled excitedly, "this must be when Voldemort vanished for the first time!"

She didn't get the expected response. Most of them had worked this out for themselves, and chose to ignore the youngest Potter.

"**Mr Dursley stopped dead."**

"Wish he did die," muttered Freddie.

"Bit harsh, Freddie," his sister replied.

" **Fear flooded him. He looked back at the whisperers as if he wanted to say something to them but thought better of it."**

"That was probably for the best," said Ted.

" **He dashed back across the road, hurried up to his office, snapped at his secretary not to disturb him, seized his telephone, and had almost finished dialling is home number when he changed his mind. He put the receiver back down and stroked his moustache, thinking... no he was being stupid. Potter wasn't such an unusual name. He was sure there were lots of people called Potter who had a son called Harry. Come to thing of it, he wasn't even sure is nephew was called Harry. He'd never even seen the boy. It might have been Harvey. Or Harold."**

"Your great uncle sounds like a right arsehole!" Hugo exclaimed.

"**There was no point in worrying Mrs Dursley; she always got so upset at any mention of her sister. He didn't blame her-if he'd had a sister like that...but all the same, these people in cloaks...He found it a lot harder to concentrate on drills that afternoon and when he left the building at five o'clock, he was still so worried that he walked straight into someone just outside the door.**

**"Sorry." he grunted, as the tiny old man stumbled and almost fell.** **It was a few seconds before Mr Dursley realised that the man was wearing a violet cloak. He didn't seem at all upset at being almost knocked to the ground. On the contrary his face split into a wide smile and he said in a squeaky voice that made passerby's stare, "Don't be sorry, my dear sir, for nothing could upset me today! Rejoice, for You-Know-Who has gone at last! Even Muggles like yourself should be celebrating, this happy, happy day!"**

**And the old man hugged Mr Dursley around the middle and walked off."**

"Aw, bless him," grinned Roxanne, "he sounds adorable."

"**Mr Dursley stood rooted to the spot. He had been hugged by a complete stranger. He also thought he had been called a Muggle, whatever that was. He was rattled. He hurried to his car and set off for home, hoping he was imagining things, which he had never hoped before, because he didn't approve of imagination."**

"But imagination is brilliant," frowned Lucy.

"Apparently not to this guy," muttered James.

"**As he pulled into the driveway of number four, the first thing he saw- and it didn't improve is mood-was the tabby cat he'd spotted that morning. It was now sitting on his garden wall. He was sure it was the same one; it had the same marking around the eyes."**

Hugo grinned. "Yup, define-"

Rose cut across him. "We _know_ who it is!"

**"Shoo!" said Mr Dursley loudly.** **The cat didn't move. It just gave him a stern look."**

They all laughed or grinned. There was no need for interruption; if they'd seen McGonagall's animagus form, they'd seen a stern cat.

"**Was this normal cat behaviour? Mr Dursley wondered. Trying to pull himself together, he let himself into the house. He was still determined not to mention anything to his wife.** **Mrs Dursley had had a nice, normal day. She told him over dinner all about Mrs Next Door's problems with her daughter and how Dudley had learned a new word ("Shan't!")."**

"Oh, he sounds a delight too," said Dom, sarcastically, of course.

"**Mr Dursley tried to act normally. When Dudley had been put to bed, he went into the living room in time to catch the last report on the evening news:**

"**And finally, bird-watchers everywhere have reported that the nation's owls have been behaving very unusually today. Although owls normally hunt at night and are hardly ever seen in daylight, there have been hundreds of sightings of these birds flying in every direction since sunrise. Experts are unable to explain why the owls have suddenly changed their sleeping pattern." The newscaster allowed himself a grin. "Most mysterious. And now, over to Jim McGuffin with the weather. Going to be any more showers of owls tonight, Jim?"**

"**Well, Ted," said the weatherman, "I don't know about that, but it's not only the owls that have been acting oddly today. Viewers as far apart as Kent, Yorkshire, and Dundee have been phoning in to tell me that instead of the rain I promised yesterday, they've had a downpour of shooting stars! Perhaps people have been celebrating Bonfire Night early-"**

"Bonfire night?" asked Scorpius.

"A Muggle tradition; they basically light a big fire," Rose answered.

"Sounds exciting," Louis remarked.

" — **it's not until next week, folks! But I can promise a wet night tonight."** **Mr Dursley sat frozen in his armchair. Shooting stars all over Britain? Owls flying by daylight? Mysterious people in cloaks all over the place? And a whisper, a whisper about the Potters…Mrs Dursley came into the living room carrying two cups of tea. It was no good. He'd have to say something to her. He cleared his throat nervously. "Er — Petunia, dear — you haven't heard from your sister lately, have you?"** **As he had expected, Mrs Dursley looked shocked and angry. After all, they normally pretended she didn't have a sister."**

"What a bitch!" This was Victoire, exclaiming angrily.

"**No," she said sharply. "Why?"**

"**Funny stuff on the news," Mr Dursley mumbled. "Owls… shooting stars… and there were a lot of funny-looking people in town today…"**

"**So?" snapped Mrs Dursley.**

"**Well, I just thought… maybe… it was something to do with… you know…****her****crowd."** **Mrs Dursley sipped her tea through pursed lips. Mr Dursley wondered whether he dared tell her he'd heard the name "Potter." He decided he didn't dare. Instead he said, as casually as he could, "Their son — he'd be about Dudley's age now, wouldn't he?"**

"**I suppose so," said Mrs Dursley stiffly.**

"**What's his name again? Howard, isn't it?"**

"**Harry. Nasty, common name, if you ask me."**

"We didn't," muttered Lily sulkily.

""**Oh, yes," said Mr Dursley, his heart sinking horribly. "Yes, I quite agree."** **He didn't say another word on the subject as they went upstairs to bed. While Mrs Dursley was in the bathroom, Mr Dursley crept to the bedroom window and peered down into the front garden. The cat was still there. It was staring down Privet Drive as though it were waiting for something.** **Was he imagining things? Could all this have anything to do with the Potters? If it did… if it got out that they were related to a pair of — -"**

"Pair of what, exactly?" Albus interjected, looking affronted.

"Doesn't say, mate," James replied, similarly angry on behalf of his grandparents.

"**- well, he didn't think he could bear it.** **The Dursley got into bed. Mrs Dursley fell asleep quickly but Mr Dursley lay awake, turning it all over in his mind. His last, comforting thought before he fell asleep was that even if the Potters****were****involved, there was no reason for them to come near him and Mrs Dursley. The Potters knew very well what he and Petunia thought about them and their kind… He couldn't see how he and Petunia could get mixed up in anything that might be going on — he yawned and turned over — it couldn't affect****them…How very wrong he was."**

"That's very dramatic," Freddie remarked dryly.

"**Mr Dursley might have been drifting into an uneasy sleep, but the cat on the wall outside was showing no sign of sleepiness."**

Teddy smiled. "'Course it's not, McGonagall would never sleep on the job!"

"**It was sitting as still as a statue, its eyes fixed unblinkingly on the far corner of Privet Drive. It didn't so much as quiver when a car door slammed on the next street, nor when two owls swooped overhead. In fact, it was nearly midnight before the cat moved at all.** **A man appeared on the corner the cat had been watching, appeared so suddenly and silently you'd have thought he'd just popped out of the ground. The cat's tail twitched and its eyes narrowed.** **Nothing like this man had ever been seen on Privet Drive. He was tall, thin, and very old, judging by the silver of his hair and beard, which were both long enough to tuck into his belt. He was wearing long robes, a purple cloak that swept the ground, and high-heeled, buckled boots. His blue eyes were light, bright, and sparkling behind half-moon spectacles and his nose was very long and crooked, as though it had been broken at least twice. This man's name was Albus Dumbledore."**

"Dumbledore," breathed Albus. He sat up more, interested to hear about the man he was named after. Rose sat up too; her mother held this man in great esteem and he'd always sounded incredible to Rose. Teddy had Victoire sitting almost on his lap, so he didn't sit up, but he looked up from playing with her silvery hair.

"**Albus Dumbledore didn't seem to realise that he had just arrived in a street where everything from his name to his boots was unwelcome.** **He was busy rummaging in his cloak, looking for something. But he did seem to realise he was being watched, because he looked up suddenly at the cat, which was still staring at him from the other end of the street. For some reason, the sight of the cat seemed to amuse him. He chuckled and muttered, "I should have known."** **He found what he was looking for in his inside pocket. It seemed to be a silver cigarette lighter."**

"Cigarette?" Louis asked Rose.

"All I know is that they're Muggle inventions and are awful for your health. Mum thinks they're disgusting, but I'm not sure what they are."

" **He flicked it open, held it up in the air, and clicked it. The nearest street lamp went out with a little pop."**

Something registered in Hugo's brain. "Hey! Dad's got that!"

" **He clicked it again — the next lamp flickered into darkness. Twelve times he clicked the Put-Outer, until the only lights left on the whole street were two tiny pinpricks in the distance, which were the eyes of the cat watching him. If anyone looked out of their window now, even beady-eyed Mrs Dursley, they wouldn't be able to see anything that was happening down on the pavement. Dumbledore slipped the Put-Outer back inside his cloak and set off down the street toward number four, where he sat down on the wall next to the cat. He didn't look at it, but after a moment he spoke to it.**

"**Fancy seeing you here, Professor McGonagall."** **He turned to smile at the tabby, but it had gone. Instead he was smiling at a rather severe-looking woman who was wearing square glasses exactly the shape of the markings the cat had had around its eyes. She, too, was wearing a cloak, an emerald one. Her black hair was drawn into a tight bun. She looked distinctly ruffled.**

**"How did you know it was me?" she asked.**

"**My dear Professor, I've never seen a cat sit so stiffly."**

**You'd be stiff if you'd been sitting on a brick wall all day," said Professor McGonagall.**

"**All day? When you could have been celebrating? I must have passed a dozen feasts and parties on my way here."** **Professor McGonagall sniffed angrily."**

"How do you sniff angrily?" Lucy asked.

"If anyone could-" began Freddie.

"-it's McGonagall," finished Roxanne, Teddy, Hugo and Louis, simultaneously.

"**"You'd think they'd be a bit more careful, but no — even the Muggles have noticed something's going on. It was on their news."** **She jerked her head back at the Dursley' dark living-room window. "I heard it. Flocks of owls… shooting stars… Well, they're not completely stupid. They were bound to notice something. Shooting stars down in Kent — I'll bet that was Dedalus Diggle. He never had much sense."**

"**You can't blame them," said Dumbledore gently. "We've had precious little to celebrate for eleven years."**

"**I know that," said Professor McGonagall irritably. "But that's no reason to lose our heads. People are being downright careless, out on the streets in broad daylight, not even dressed in Muggle clothes, swapping rumours." She threw a sharp, sideways glance at Dumbledore here, as though hoping he was going to tell her something, but he didn't, so she went on. "A fine thing it would be if, on the very day You-Know-Who seems to have disappeared at last, the Muggles found out about us all. I suppose he really****has****gone, Dumbledore?"**

"**It certainly seems so," said Dumbledore.** "**We have much to be thankful for. Would you care for a sherbet lemon?"**

"A _what?_" asked Dom.

James grinned and continued over her. **"A****what?"**

"**A sherbet lemon. They're a kind of Muggle sweet I'm rather fond of."**

**No, thank you," said Professor McGonagall coldly, as though she didn't think this was the moment for sherbet lemons. "As I say, even if You-Know-Who****has****gone —"**

"**My dear Professor, surely a sensible person like yourself can call him by his name? All this 'You-Know-Who' nonsense — for eleven years I have been trying to persuade people to call him by his proper name:****Voldemort."** **Professor McGonagall flinched, but Dumbledore, who was unsticking two sherbet lemons, seemed not to notice. "It all gets so confusing if we keep saying 'You-Know-Who.'"**

"I can think of much better reasons why not to call him You-Know-Who," snorted Scorpius.

" **I have never seen any reason to be frightened of saying Voldemort's name."**

**"I know you haven't," said Professor McGonagall, sounding half exasperated, half admiring. "But you're different. Everyone knows you're the only one You-Know- oh, all right,****Voldemort, was frightened of."**

"**You flatter me," said Dumbledore calmly. "Voldemort had powers I will never have."**

"**Only because you're too — well —noble****to use them."**

"Bless," said Roxanne, again.

"**It's lucky it's dark. I haven't blushed so much since Madam Pomfrey told me she liked my new earmuffs."** **Professor McGonagall shot a sharp look at Dumbledore and said, "The owls are nothing next to the****rumours****that are flying around. You know what they're saying? About why he's disappeared? About what finally stopped him?"** **It seemed that Professor McGonagall had reached the point she was most anxious to discuss, the real reason she had been waiting on a cold, hard wall all day, for neither as a cat nor as a woman had she fixed Dumbledore with such a piercing stare as she did now. It was plain that whatever "everyone" was saying, she was not going to believe it until Dumbledore told her it was true. Dumbledore, however, was choosing another sherbet lemon and did not answer."**

James put the book down. "Does anyone else fancy taking over? It's bloody tiring."

Rose was quick to volunteer, and James happily handed the book over and took a long drink of pumpkin juice.

"**What they're****saying," she pressed on, "is that last night Voldemort turned up in Godric's Hollow. He went to find the Potters.** **The rumour is that Lily and James Potter are — are — that they're —****dead."** **Dumbledore bowed his head. Professor McGonagall gasped.**

"**Lily and James… I can't believe it… I didn't want to believe it… Oh, Albus…"**

James paused for a moment, and was glad that everyone remained quiet for a moment, for Lily and James Potter, before he pressed on.

"**Dumbledore reached out and patted her on the shoulder. "I know… I know…" he said heavily.** **Professor McGonagall's voice trembled as she went on. "That's not all. They're saying he tried to kill the Potter's son, Harry**. **But - he couldn't. He couldn't kill that little boy. No one knows why, or how, but they're saying that when he couldn't kill Harry Potter, Voldemort's power somehow broke — and that's why he's gone."** **Dumbledore nodded glumly.**

"**It's — it's**_**true**_**?" faltered Professor McGonagall. "After all he's done… all the people he's killed… he couldn't kill a little boy? It's just astounding… of all the things to stop him… but how in the name of heaven did Harry survive?"**

"**We can only guess." said Dumbledore. "We may never know."**

"Aw," James scowled, "I quite fancied knowing."

"**Professor McGonagall pulled out a lace handkerchief and dabbed at her eyes beneath her spectacles. Dumbledore gave a great sniff as he took a golden watch from his pocket and examined it. It was a very odd watch. It had twelve hands but no numbers; instead, little planets were moving around the edge. It must have made sense to Dumbledore, though, because he put it back in his pocket and said, "Hagrid's late. I suppose it was he who told you I'd be here, by the way?"**

"**Yes," said Professor McGonagall. "And I don't suppose you're going to tell me**_**why**_**you're here, of all places?"**

"**I've come to bring Harry to his aunt and uncle. They're the only family he has left now."**

"**You don't mean – you**_**can't**_**mean the people who live**_**here**_**?" cried Professor McGonagall, jumping to her feet and pointing at number four. "Dumbledore — you can't. I've been watching them all day. You couldn't find two people who are less like us. And they've got this son — I saw him kicking his mother all the way up the street, screaming for sweets. Harry Potter come and live here!"**

**It's the best place for him," said Dumbledore firmly. "His aunt and uncle will be able to explain everything to him when he's older. I've written them a letter."**

"Does he really think that'll work? Thought the guy was supposed to be clever," Louis rubbed his jaw.

"Oh, he's only the greatest wizard for over two centuries!" retorted Dom. Louis made a face at her.

""**A letter?" repeated Professor McGonagall faintly, sitting back down on the wall. "Really, Dumbledore, you think you can explain all this in a letter?** **These people will never understand him! He'll be famous — a legend — I wouldn't be surprised if today was known as Harry Potter day in the future-"**

"Do we know the date it happened?" Lucy asked.

Albus pulled a face. "No, never really wanted to ask Dad..."

Freddie snorted. "Yeah, sounds like a cheery conversation – 'Hey, Dad, so what was the date your folks died, you were nearly killed, and it rendered you to live with the Despicable Dursleys?'"

James laughed. "— **there will be books written about Harry — every child in our world will know his name!"**

"**Exactly." said Dumbledore, looking very seriously over the top of his half-moon glasses. "It would be enough to turn any boy's head. Famous before he can walk and talk! Famous for something he won't even remember! Can you see how much better off he'll be, growing up away from all that until he's ready to take it?"** **Professor McGonagall opened her mouth, changed her mind, swallowed, and then said, "Yes — yes, you're right, of course. But how is the boy getting here, Dumbledore?" She eyed his cloak suddenly as though she thought he might be hiding Harry underneath it.**

"**Hagrid's bringing him."**

"**You think it —**_**wise**_**— to trust Hagrid with something as important as this?"**

"**I would trust Hagrid with my life," said Dumbledore.**

"Hmm," Teddy said, "not sure I'd go that far. I've not forgotten the Giant Fire Puffles."

"**I'm not saying his heart isn't in the right place," said Professor McGonagall grudgingly, "but you can't pretend he's not careless. He does tend to — what was that?"** **A low rumbling sound had broken the silence around them. It grew steadily louder as they looked up and down the street for some sign of a headlight; it swelled to a roar as they both looked up at the sky — and a huge motorbike fell out of the air and landed on the road in front of them.** **If the motorbike was huge, it was nothing to the man sitting astride it. He was almost twice as tall as a normal man and at least five times as wide. He looked simply too big to be allowed, and so**_**wild**_**— long tangles of bushy black hair and beard hid most of his face, he had hands the size of trash can lids, and his feet in their leather boots were like baby dolphins.** **In his vast, muscular arms he was holding a bundle of blankets."**

"And enter the Boy Who Lived," muttered Louis.

""**Hagrid," said Dumbledore, sounding relieved. "At last. And where did you get that motorbike?"**

"**Borrowed it, Professor Dumbledore, sir," said the giant, climbing carefully off the motorbike as he spoke. "Young Sirius Black lent it to me. I've got him, sir."**

Louis perked up, "If the man has a flying motorbike, he's got my respect."

""**No problems, were there?"**

"**No, sir — house was almost destroyed, but I got him out all right before the Muggles started swarmin' around. He fell asleep as we was flyin' over Bristol."** **Dumbledore and Professor McGonagall bent forward over the bundle of blankets. Inside, just visible, was a baby boy, fast asleep.**"

There were some "awwh"s from Molly and Lily, and Roxanne, Teddy, Dom and Lucy all smiled.

"**Under a tuft of jet-black hair over his forehead they could see a curiously shaped cut, like a bolt of lightning.**

"**Is that where —?" whispered Professor McGonagall.**

"**Yes," said Dumbledore. "He'll have that scar forever**."

"**Couldn't you do something about it, Dumbledore?"**

"**Even if I could, I wouldn't. Scars can come in handy. I have one myself above my left knee that is a perfect map of the London Underground. Well — give him here, Hagrid — we'd better get this over with."** **Dumbledore took Harry in his arms and turned toward the Dursley's house.**

"**Could I — could I say good-bye to him, sir?" asked Hagrid. He bent his great, shaggy head over Harry and gave him what must have been a very scratchy, whiskery kiss. Then, suddenly, Hagrid let out a howl like a wounded dog.**

"**Shhh!" hissed Professor McGonagall, "You'll wake the Muggles!"**

"**S-s-sorry," sobbed Hagrid, taking out a large, spotted handkerchief and burying his face in it. "But I c-c-can't stand it —Lily an' James dead — an' poor little Harry off ter live with Muggles —"**

"**Yes, yes, it's all very sad, but get a grip on yourself, Hagrid, or we'll be found," Professor McGonagall whispered, patting Hagrid gingerly on the arm as Dumbledore stepped over the low garden wall and walked to the front door. He laid Harry gently on the doorstep, took a letter out of his cloak, tucked it inside Harry's blankets, and then came back to the other two.** **For a full minute the three of them stood and looked at the little bundle; Hagrid's shoulders shook, Professor McGonagall blinked furiously, and the twinkling light that usually shone from Dumbledore's eyes seemed to have gone out.**

"**Well," said Dumbledore finally, "that's that. We've no business staying here. We may as well go and join the celebrations."**

"**Yeah," said Hagrid in a very muffled voice, "I best get this bike away. G'night, Professor McGonagall — Professor Dumbledore, sir."** **Wiping his streaming eyes on his jacket sleeve, Hagrid swung himself onto the motorbike and kicked the engine into life; with a roar it rose into the air and off into the night.**

"**I shall see you soon, I expect, Professor McGonagall," said Dumbledore, nodding to her. Professor McGonagall blew her nose in reply.** **Dumbledore turned and walked back down the street. On the corner he stopped and took out the silver Put-Outer. He clicked it once and twelve balls of light sped back to their street lamps so that Privet Drive glowed suddenly orange and he could make out a tabby cat slinking around the corner at the other end of the street. He could just see the bundle of blankets on the step of number four.**

"**Good luck, Harry," he murmured. He turned on his heel and with a swish of his cloak, he was gone.** **A breeze ruffled the neat hedges of Privet Drive, which lay silent and tidy under the inky sky, the very last place you would expect astonishing things to happen. Harry Potter rolled over inside his blankets without waking up. One small hand closed on the letter beside him and he slept on, not knowing he was special, not knowing he was famous, not knowing he would be woken in a few hours' time by Mrs Dursley's scream as she opened the front door to put out the milk bottles, nor that he would spend the next few weeks being prodded and pinched by his cousin Dudley… He couldn't know that at this very moment, people meeting in secret all over the country were holding up their glasses and saying in hushed voices: "To Harry Potter — the boy who lived!"**

Rose put the book down, "That's the end of the chapter."

"I'm all for reading on," Molly said, and the room as a whole agreed. There was some adjusting – Freddie took the break as an opportunity to push Roxanne off her beanbag, she used the break as an opportunity to whack him with a cushion; Albus moved to sit on the floor by Rose instead of on the sofa, and James jumped to take his place.

There was silence as they all tried not to read, before Molly rolled her eyes and picked up the book.


	2. Chapter 2: The Vanishing Glass

**A lovely reviewer pointed out where I was going wrong. I noticed it. And decided I'd edit this. So not an update (but this is over 1000 words longer now) and in the next few hours I'll upload chapter three. **

**And tomorrow you'll get chapter four. **

**I know I said every other day, but in my defence, my internet didn't work yesterday. **

**Own zilch. **

* * *

><p>"<strong>Chapter Two: The Vanishing Glass,"<strong> Molly read, in a slightly pompous voice, very similar to how her father might read the book.

"**Nearly ten years had passed since the Dursleys had woken up to find their nephew on the front step, -"**

James and Freddie snickered. It did sound quite funny, after all.

"-**but Privet Drive had hardly changed at all.** **The sun rose on the same tidy front gardens and lit up the brass number four on the Dursleys' front door; it crept into their living room, which was almost exactly the same as it had been on the night when Mr Dursley had seen that fateful news report about the owls."**

"Blimey, that sounds dull! Imagine if the house never changed in ten years," James mused.

Lily snorted. "Yeah, with you around, that'll never happen. I think we're lucky not to have needed a new house by now."

James grinned, clearly proud that this was how he was viewed.

"**Only the photographs on the mantelpiece really showed how much time had passed. Ten years ago, there had been lots of pictures of what looked like a large pink beach ball wearing different-coloured bonnets-"**

"-Dashing-" Lily interjected.

"— **but Dudley Dursley was no longer a baby, and now the photographs showed a large blond boy riding his first bicycle, on a carousel at the fair, playing a computer game with his father, being hugged and kissed by his mother. The room held no sign at all that another boy lived in the house, too."**

The Potters, and indeed, most of the other occupants, frowned at this.

"**Yet Harry Potter was still there,** **asleep at the moment, but not for long. His Aunt Petunia was awake and it was her shrill voice that made the first noise of the day.**

"**Up! Get up! Now!"** **Harry woke with a start. His aunt rapped on the door again."**

"Ugh," Freddie shuddered, "And I thought Roxanne's face first thing was bad."

Roxanne didn't reply, choosing instead to slap her brother around the head.

""**Up!" she screeched. Harry heard her walking toward the kitchen and then the sound of the frying pan being put on the stove. He rolled onto his back and tried to remember the dream he had been having. It had been a good one. There had been a flying motorbike in it."**

"And that," grinned James, "is all you need to have a good dream."

" **He had a funny feeling he'd had the same dream before.** **His aunt was back outside the door.**

"**Are you up yet?" she demanded.**

"**Nearly," said Harry.**

"**Well, get a move on, I want you to look after the bacon. And don't you dare let it burn, I want everything perfect on Duddy's birthday."**

"But Dad's a rubbish cook," joked James. Lily glared at him for downplaying something serious. Lily was James' little sister. James ignored Lily.

Molly interrupted, "Wait, he's cooking? He's ten!"

Freddie snorted. "I'll have him on slow roast, medium rare, please."

Roxanne slapped him again for failing to grasp the solemnity of this.

"But that's just cruel. Like, labour, at ten!" Dominique cried.

Albus tried to imagine Ginny Potter forcing him to do this, and couldn't, and tried again with his many aunts. He knew Fleur was all for getting her children to cook, but that was when they were older, and with her supervision.

"**Harry groaned.**

"**What did you say?" his aunt snapped through the door."**

"Nothing," Lily grumbled. Lucy frowned, furrowing her brow. Harry's aunt didn't seem a particularly nice woman.

"**Nothing, nothing…"** **Dudley's birthday — how could he have forgotten? Harry got slowly out of bed and started looking for socks. He found a pair under his bed and, after pulling a spider off one of them, put them on.** **Harry was used to spiders, because the cupboard under the stairs was full of them, and that was where he slept."**

Here, Molly stopped, shocked.

"That's horrible!" Dominique looked outraged at this treatment.

"What!" Lily cried. She almost did cry, actually. Her brave, wonderful, lovely father was brought up in a cupboard? James and Albus suddenly looked like the brothers they'd never looked like – the expression of anger was almost identical and emphasised their similarities. And they both looked outraged.

Freddie, feeling the need to lighten the situation (as always), said "I dunno, he's scrawny enough." No one dignified this with an answer, physical or verbal. Roxanne's cheerful grin was missing from her face, Lucy looked as though she couldn't believe how someone could treat their nephew this way – her many uncles and aunts doted upon her as much as they doted on their own. Teddy hugged Victoire closer (they somehow succeeded in being a few millimetres closer), Rose just looked shocked and Hugo and Louis just looked uncomfortable with their current emotions.

"**When he was dressed he went down the hall into the kitchen. The table was almost hidden beneath all Dudley's birthday presents. It looked as though Dudley had gotten the new computer he wanted, not to mention the second television and the racing bike.**"

"Not even gonna ask what they are," James said, but without a smile. Rose had opened her mouth as James had, and looked slightly put out that she hadn't been asked.

"**Exactly why Dudley wanted a racing bike was a mystery to Harry, as Dudley was very fat and hated exercise — unless of course it involved punching somebody.** **Dudley's favourite punching bag was Harry,-"**

"What a total wanker," James exclaimed angrily. Teddy felt he should have chided James' language but he agreed with James wholeheartedly.

"**-but he couldn't often catch him. Harry didn't look it, but he was very fast**. **Perhaps it had something to do with living in a dark cupboard, but Harry had always been small and skinny for his age."**

Hugo smiled, "and he's given that gift to Albus and James."

"**He looked even smaller and skinnier than he really was because all he had to wear were old clothes of Dudley's,-"**

"But that's outrageous," started Dominique, "They hardly seem struggling for money, clothes aren't very expensive!"

"-** and Dudley was about four times bigger than he was. Harry had a thin face, knobby knees, black hair, and bright green eyes.** **He wore round glasses-"**

Albus fingered the edges of his own round glasses. He, of course, probably had a lot more choice with the style than his father did, but well, Albus had come to realise (after years of wearing modern, bright glasses) that the only glasses which would suit him were round glasses, just like his father's.

Not that he didn't mind looking like his father, it's just, with a second-hand name, second-hand face, he'd like something entirely unique. Entirely 'Al', as he'd been trying (in vain) to get people to call him. ** "-held together with a lot of Sellotape because of all the times Dudley had punched him on the nose.** **The only thing Harry liked about his own appearance was a very thin scar on his forehead that was shaped like a bolt of lightning.** **He had had it as long as he could remember, and the first question he could ever remember asking his Aunt Petunia was how he had gotten it.**

"**In the car crash when your parents died," she had said.**

"**And don't ask questions."**"

"I've never had so much sympathy for Uncle Harry," Lucy remarked sadly.

"**Don't ask questions — that was the first rule for a quiet life with the Dursleys.** **Uncle Vernon entered the kitchen as Harry was turning over the bacon.**

"**Comb your hair!" he barked, by way of a morning greeting."**

Albus and James, having both inherited their father's hair, smiled knowingly. The Potter hair, as Ginny called it, was notoriously messy, and stubbornly refused to lie flat. Ginny liked to say it portrayed the Potter mentality.

"**About once a week, Uncle Vernon looked over the top of his newspaper and shouted that Harry needed a haircut. Harry must have had more haircuts than the rest of the boys in his class put together, but it made no difference, his hair simply grew that way — all over the place."**

"Could be worse," Victoire muttered, "it could be bright orange." She fingered her hair with distain. Dominique and Louis grinned at her; they'd both inherited the beautiful Veela hair. Victoire looked very similar to her mother, with only her hair being different (hair and the ears, they stuck out far too much, but the hair hid them).

Teddy smiled and stroked her hair too. "I like it."

"**Harry was frying eggs by the time Dudley arrived in the kitchen with his mother.** **Dudley looked a lot like Uncle Vernon. He had a large pink face, not much neck, small, watery blue eyes, and thick blond hair that lay smoothly on his thick, fat head."**

"Poor kid," interjected Freddie, ruffling his dark brown hair as he did so, as if to emphasise how lovely his hair was in comparison.

"**Aunt Petunia often said that Dudley looked like a baby angel — Harry often said that Dudley looked like a pig in a wig."**

Snorts circulated the room.

"**Harry put the plates of egg and bacon on the table, which was difficult as there wasn't much room. Dudley, meanwhile, was counting his presents. His face fell.**

"**Thirty-six," he said, looking up at his mother and father. "That's two less than last year.""**

"Thirty-six? That's a ridiculous amount of presents!" Lucy said.

"Thirty-six presents? Bloody hell, that's a hell of a spoilt kid," said James. Even Scorpius nodded, and his father always tried to buy Scorpius off on his birthdays.

"Imagine trying to find thirty-six presents every year for him," said Hugo, who found it hard enough to get one present for a person. His eyes were wide in wonder.

""**Darling, you haven't counted Auntie Marge's present, see, it's here under this big one from Mummy and Daddy."**

"**All right, thirty-seven then," said Dudley, going red in the face. Harry, who could see a huge Dudley tantrum coming on, began wolfing down his bacon as fast as possible in case Dudley turned the table over."**

"He's getting into a tantrum over thirty-seven presents?" said Scorpius, completely amazed. "I'd hate to know what my parents would do if I got into a tantrum over that!"

"Maman would probably refuse to buy us anything until we were thirty-seven ourselves," Louis predicted. Dominique almost rolled her eyes at her brother's exaggeration, but then thought about it. Fleur Weasley probably would do that.

" **Aunt Petunia obviously scented danger, too, because she said quickly, "And we'll buy you another two presents while we're out today. How's that, popkin? Two more presents. Is that all right?""**

"I thought it was the child's job to be afraid of the mother, not the other way around," Roxanne remarked dryly.

"**Dudley thought for a moment. It looked like hard work. Finally he said slowly, "So I'll have thirty… thirty…"**

"**Thirty-nine, sweetums," said Aunt Petunia."**

"He's _eleven_," Lucy said in disbelief.

""**Oh." Dudley sat down heavily and grabbed the nearest parcel. "All right then."**

**Uncle Vernon chuckled."**

"He hardly needs encouragement," Dominique scoffed.

""**Little tyke wants his money's worth, just like his father. 'Atta boy, Dudley!" He ruffled Dudley's hair."**

"Well, he's no bloody help either," Victoire said furiously. "He's not even trying to bring Dudley up well!"

" **At that moment the telephone rang and Aunt Petunia went to answer it while Harry and Uncle Vernon watched Dudley unwrap the racing bike, a video camera, a remote control airplane, sixteen new computer games, and a video recorder."**

"Are they impressive presents?" Scorpius asked the room at large.

"Yup," Freddie nodded, "we've seen them in shops. Loads of kids want all of them," he gestured at himself and Roxanne.

"Spoilt brat," Lily muttered.

"**He was ripping the paper off a gold wristwatch-"**

"But that's what you get when you're of age!" Louis cried out, having desperately wanted one since Teddy had got one. He seemed to find it very unjust that this eleven year old boy got one and didn't even care.

"-** when Aunt Petunia came back from the telephone looking both angry and worried.**

"**Bad news, Vernon," she said. "Mrs Figg's broken her leg. She can't take him."** **She jerked her head in Harry's direction.** **Dudley's mouth fell open in horror, but Harry's heart gave a leap. Every year on Dudley's birthday, his parents took him and a friend out for the day, to adventure parks, hamburger restaurants, or the movies. Every year, Harry was left behind with Mrs Figg, a mad old lady who lived two streets away. Harry hated it there. The whole house smelled of cabbage and Mrs Figg made him look at photographs of all the cats she'd ever owned."**

Roxanne pulled a face. It sounded perfectly ghastly. She found it hard enough seeing her Johnson grandparents, who at least smelled of old people instead of cabbage, and she and Freddie were able to muck around, and George often tried to break free and join them.

""**Now what?" said Aunt Petunia, looking furiously at Harry as though he'd planned this. Harry knew he ought to feel sorry that Mrs Figg had broken her leg,-"**

James interrupted her, "Don't think I would."

"-** but it wasn't easy when he reminded himself it would be a whole year before he had to look at Tibbles, Snowy, Mr Paws, and Tufty again.**

"**We could phone Marge," Uncle Vernon suggested.**

"**Don't be silly, Vernon, she hates the boy.""**

Lily jumped up angrily. "They don't have to call him 'the boy'! He's clearly got a name!" Roxanne pulled her down, trying to calm the girl who inherited Ginny's quick temper and Harry's stubborn anger.

Lily wasn't quietened easily, and kept a look of high disgust on her face. Many of the other occupants had a similar disgusted look, mind, they hated to hear first hand how their brave, famous, amazing, wonderful Uncle Harry was mistreated. It gave him whole new depths.

"**The Dursleys often spoke about Harry like this, as though he wasn't there — or rather, as though he was something very nasty that couldn't understand them, like a slug."**

James couldn't help himself and let out a snort, shared a look with Louis, both trying to hold in laughter. Freddie didn't even try and snickered, so Roxanne hit him over the head. Molly spoke loudly over the twins' petty bickering.

""**What about what's-her-name, your friend — Yvonne?"**

"**On holiday in Majorca," snapped Aunt Petunia.**

"**You could just leave me here," Harry put in hopefully (he'd be able to watch what he wanted on television for a change and maybe even have a go on Dudley's computer)-"**

"Be nice and let him stay alone," Lucy almost begged the book.

" **Aunt Petunia looked as though she'd just swallowed a lemon.**

"**And come back and find the house in ruins?" she snarled.**

"**I won't blow up the house," said Harry, but they weren't listening.**

"**I suppose we could take him to the zoo," said Aunt Petunia slowly, "… and leave him in the car…""**

Lucy raised an eyebrow. "Like a dog? Charming."

""**That car's new, he's not sitting in it alone…"** **Dudley began to cry loudly. In fact, he wasn't really crying — it had been years since he'd really cried — but he knew that if he screwed up his face and wailed, his mother would give him anything he wanted.**

"**Dinky Duddydums-"**

The room snickered. Even Molly was grinning as she read it.

"**-don't cry, Mummy won't let him spoil your special day!" she cried, flinging her arms around him.**

"**I… don't… want… him… t-t-to come!" Dudley yelled between huge, pretend sobs. "He always sp-spoils everything!" He shot Harry a nasty grin through the gap in his mother's arms.** **Just then, the doorbell rang — "Oh, good Lord, they're here!" said Aunt Petunia frantically — and a moment later, Dudley's best friend, Piers Polkiss, walked in with his mother.** **Piers was a scrawny boy with a face like a rat.** **He was usually the one who held people's arms behind their backs while Dudley hit them."**

"Sounds like a similarly delightful git," Teddy muttered.

" **Dudley stopped pretending to cry at once.** **Half an hour later, Harry, who couldn't believe his luck, was sitting in the back of the Dursleys' car with Piers and Dudley, on the way to the zoo for the first time in his life."**

"But even I've been to a zoo," Lucy said.

"Have you? We haven't," Freddie frowned, having decided that George and Angelina had certainly not lived up to their parental duties.

"I'm not surprised. Your parents aren't stupid. Imagine letting you two run riot with a bunch of animals and Muggles," Teddy remarked. Freddie and Roxanne grinned at him, this observation clearly not affecting them.

" **His aunt and uncle hadn't been able to think of anything else to do with him, but before they'd left, Uncle Vernon had taken Harry aside.**

"**I'm warning you," he had said, putting his large purple face right up close to Harry's, "I'm warning you now, boy — any funny business, anything at all — and you'll be in that cupboard from now until Christmas.""**

"Don't you _dare_!" Lily cried out furiously. Each of them was hoping that nothing eventful happened at the zoo, but were sure of otherwise.

"**I'm not going to do anything," said Harry, "honestly…"** **But Uncle Vernon didn't believe him. No one ever did.** **The problem was, strange things often happened around Harry and it was just no good telling the Dursleys he didn't make them happen.** **Once, Aunt Petunia, tired of Harry coming back from the barbers looking as though he hadn't been at all, had taken a pair of kitchen scissors and cut his hair so short he was almost bald except for his fringe, which she left "to hide that horrible scar.""**

"Papa has worse scars," Dominique muttered quietly, and indeed, it was a bit like Bill's face had been cut in half and sewn back together, but a few millimetres off, like it wasn't aligned properly.

"I reckon Dad's is worst. It's a bloody great hole in his head," Roxanne said. It was worse when he kept his wand there "for safekeeping", as that always aggravated it slightly, given that the wand was thicker than the hole – Roxanne suspected magic was involved – and it was red and inflamed and the suddenly a black hole and some remnants of where the ear once was.

"**Dudley had laughed himself silly at Harry, who spent a sleepless night imagining school the next day, where he was already laughed at for his baggy clothes and taped glasses.** **Next morning, however, he had gotten up to find his hair exactly as it had been before Aunt Petunia had sheared it off."**

Lily laughed. " Brilliant!"

"**He had been given a week in his cupboard for this, even though he had tried to explain that he couldn't explain how it had grown back so quickly."**

"Poor dad!" Albus exclaimed.

"Understatement perhaps," James muttered.

" **Another time, Aunt Petunia had been trying to force him into a revolting old jumper of Dudley's (brown with orange puff balls)."**

"Funny, sounds just like the one Mum was trying to persuade Albie _not_ to wear," James grinned.

"Shut up," Albus groaned.

"Well, Al, I mean, your style is distinct to you, but," Rose began, diplomatic as ever.

"She means you have crap fashion sense," James assured his brother.

"I like my style," Albus scowled.

"You're the only one," laughed Freddie. Albus sulkily folded his arms over his thick forest green, scarlet and dark orange jumper.

" **The harder she tried to pull it over his head, the smaller it seemed to become, until finally it might have fitted a hand puppet, but certainly wouldn't fit Harry.** **Aunt Petunia had decided it must have shrunk in the wash and, to his great relief, Harry wasn't punished."**

"Well, that's a first," Hugo said.

"**On the other hand, he'd gotten into terrible trouble for being found on the roof of the school kitchens. Dudley's gang had been chasing him as usual when, as much to Harry's surprise as anyone else's, there he was sitting on the chimney."**

"Wish I could do that," grinned Dominique, "it would be so awesome if I could fly."

"**The Dursleys had received a very angry letter from Harry's headmistress –"**

"Can imagine."

"-**telling them Harry had been climbing school buildings. But all he'd tried to do (as he shouted at Uncle Vernon through the locked door of his cupboard) was jump behind the big rubbish bins outside the kitchen doors. Harry supposed that the wind must have caught him in mid-jump."**

"Of course that couldn't happen!" Rose cried.

"Come on, Rose, what would you think had happened?" Scorpius reasoned. Rose frowned, not speaking, which Louis took to mean she knew she couldn't argue back and so pressed on, noticing the time. "**But today, nothing was going to go wrong. It was even worth being with Dudley and Piers to be spending the day somewhere that wasn't school, his cupboard, or Mrs Figg's cabbage-smelling living room.** **While he drove, Uncle Vernon complained to Aunt Petunia. He liked to complain about things: people at work, Harry, the council, Harry, the bank, and Harry were just a few of his favourite subjects. This morning, it was motorbikes."**

"What? Motorbikes are so cool," grinned Louis.

"Louis, _Maman_ would never let you ride a motorbike. You're her _petit fils_," smirked Dominique.

Teddy winked at Victoire. "Ya think she'd let her son-in-law?"

Everyone stiffened. Teddy looked at their shocked faces and grinned widely.

"Kidding."

Victoire slapped his shoulder. "Stop messing about, honestly Teddy. I'll tell _Papa_ you're messing me around," she threatened. This had the desired effect; Teddy's smile dropped. Bill Weasley was a terrifying man when it came to his girls.

""… **roaring along like maniacs, the young hoodlums," he said, as a motorbike overtook them.**

"**I had a dream about a motorbike," said Harry, remembering suddenly. "It was flying."** **Uncle Vernon nearly crashed into the car in front. He turned right around in his seat and yelled at Harry, his face like a gigantic beetroot with a moustache: "MOTORBIKES DON'T FLY!"** **Dudley and Piers sniggered."**

As did James, Freddie, Hugo and Louis.

"Hey, doesn't Granddad have a motorbike in the shed?" Freddie asked.

"Just bits of one. I'm hinting at him to give it to me for a birthday or Christmas, but he's not so far," Louis said. "If he did, I'd totally learn how to make it fly."

"Lou, I'll help you if you give me a ride?" James asked desperately. Victoire snorted. "What makes you think you'll get it? _Maman_ wouldn't let you."

"_Papa_ would though! He'd think it was awesome!"

""**I know they don't," said Harry. "It was only a dream."** **But he wished he hadn't said anything. If there was one thing the Dursleys hated even more than his asking questions, it was his talking about anything acting in a way it shouldn't, no matter if it was in a dream or even a cartoon — they seemed to think he might get dangerous ideas."**

"Yeah," Hugo sniggered, "he might start robbing from banks and riding dragons!" They all laughed, but for Teddy, who instead frowned. "How did you know that?"

"Dad. He told me a bedtime story of two boys and a girl who did that, and then said Mum's name when he was telling the story."

"Wait, what? Dad, Uncle Ron and Aunt Hermione robbed a bank and rode a dragon?" James asked, his mouth dropping open. Hugo grinned and refused to talk any more, so James turned to his god-brother, who similarly refused to talk.

"Oh, honestly James, if it's true it'll come up at some point," Lily rolled her eyes, but James continued to pester Teddy until Teddy make it clear he wasn't going to answer, by doing something quite different with his mouth, involving Victoire. James rolled his eyes at them.

"**It was a very sunny Saturday and the zoo was crowded with families. The Dursleys bought Dudley and Piers large chocolate ice creams at the entrance and then, because the smiling lady in the van had asked Harry what he wanted before they could hurry him away, they bought him a cheap lemon ice lolly.** **It wasn't bad, either, Harry thought, licking it as they watched a gorilla scratching its head who looked remarkably like Dudley, except that it wasn't blond."**

Grins cracked around the room.

"**Harry had the best morning he'd had in a long time. He was careful to walk a little way apart from the Dursleys so that Dudley and Piers, who were starting to get bored with the animals by lunchtime, wouldn't fall back on their favourite hobby of hitting him."**

The grins dropped slightly.

" **They ate in the zoo restaurant, and when Dudley had a tantrum because his knickerbocker glory didn't have enough ice cream on top, Uncle Vernon bought him another one and Harry was allowed to finish the first.** **Harry felt, afterward, that he should have known it was all too good to last."**

"Oh, no, can't it just be a nice day?" Lily moaned.

Roxanne snorted. "'Course it can't be. No one would write about that, it'd be dull."

"**After lunch they went to the reptile house. It was cool and dark in there, with lit windows all along the walls. Behind the glass, all sorts of lizards and snakes were crawling and slithering over bits of wood and stone. Dudley and Piers wanted to see huge, poisonous cobras and thick, man-crushing pythons. Dudley quickly found the largest snake in the place. It could have wrapped its body twice around Uncle Vernon's car and crushed it into a trash can — but at the moment it didn't look in the mood. In fact, it was fast asleep.** **Dudley stood with his nose pressed against the glass, staring at the glistening brown coils."**

Molly wrinkled her nose. She wasn't too keen on snakes.

""**Make it move," he whined at his father. Uncle Vernon tapped on the glass, but the snake didn't budge.**

"**Do it again," Dudley ordered. Uncle Vernon rapped the glass smartly with his knuckles, but the snake just snoozed on.**

"**This is boring," Dudley moaned. He shuffled away.** **Harry moved in front of the tank and looked intently at the snake. He wouldn't have been surprised if it had died of boredom itself — no company except stupid people drumming their fingers on the glass trying to disturb it all day long. It was worse than having a cupboard as a bedroom, where the only visitor was Aunt Petunia hammering on the door to wake you up; at least he got to visit the rest of the house.** **The snake suddenly opened its beady eyes. Slowly, very slowly, it raised its head until its eyes were on a level with Harry's.** **It winked."**

"The snake _winked_ at him? Blimey." Louis raised an eyebrow.

"**Harry stared. Then he looked quickly around to see if anyone was watching. They weren't. He looked back at the snake and winked, too."**

"Why would you wink back?" Hugo asked. It seemed no one could think of a worthy reply, so Freddie had a shot. "He thinks it's sssssssssssexy?"

"**The snake jerked its head toward Uncle Vernon and Dudley, then raised its eyes to the ceiling." **Louis' face and voice had turned slightly baffled, and as did many of them. Even Teddy and Victoire had broken apart.

"**It gave Harry a look that said quite plainly:**

"**I get that all the time."**

"**I know," Harry murmured through the glass, though he wasn't sure the snake could hear him. "It must be really annoying."** **The snake nodded vigorously."**

"Hold up," James interrupted, "Dad can talk to snakes?"

"Certainly sounds like it," Molly said slowly.

"But that means he speaks Parseltongue!" Rose exclaimed.

"Didn't know that," Teddy frowned. Being the oldest he got on the best with Harry, and so had been told a relatively large amount about his life compared to his children, nieces and nephews. But this was one detail he'd not shared with Teddy. And Teddy could understand why, to be fair.

"**Where do you come from, anyway?" Harry asked. The snake jabbed its tail at a little sign next to the glass.** **Harry peered at it.** '**Boa Constrictor, Brazil.'"**

"Your dad is having a casual conversation with a snake," Scorpius said slowly. He looked slightly impressed, only-

"Isn't Parseltongue associated with Salazar Slytherin?" Roxanne asked. Molly, Rose and Scorpius all nodded.

""**Was it nice there?"** **The boa constrictor jabbed its tail at the sign again and Harry read on: "This specimen was bred in the zoo. "Oh, I see — so you've never been to Brazil?"** **As the snake shook its head, a deafening shout behind Harry made both of them jump. "DUDLEY! MR DURSLEY! COME AND LOOK AT THIS SNAKE! YOU WON'T BELIEVE WHAT IT'S DOING!"** **Dudley came waddling toward them as fast as he could.**

"**Out of the way, you," he said, punching Harry in the ribs. Caught by surprise, Harry fell hard on the concrete floor."**

"Git," James muttered.

"**What came next happened so fast no one saw how it happened — one second, Piers and Dudley were leaning right up close to the glass, the next, they had leapt back with howls of horror.** **Harry sat up and gasped; the glass front of the boa constrictor's tank had vanished."** "

"Brilliant, Dad!" James grinned. He, Louis and Dominique had laughed outright, and Lily giggled, imagining her father completely bemused as to what had happened (his expression took the face of Albus when confronted with Lily crying for various reasons).

" **The great snake was uncoiling itself rapidly, slithering out onto the floor. People throughout the reptile house screamed and started running for the exits.** **As the snake slid swiftly past him, Harry could have sworn a low, hissing voice said, "Brazil, here I come… Thanksss, amigo."**"

Roxanne snorted. "Of course he'd find the most polite yet most deadly snake to converse with."

"**The keeper of the reptile house was in shock.**

"**But the glass," he kept saying, "where did the glass go?"-"**

"Clearly it went where vanished objects go," Molly interrupted herself, and waited for someone to answer the implied question.

"Into everything," Victoire said, unimpressed with Molly's tone.

Molly was quick to rebut (and prove wrong) her cousin, "No, it's into nothing, actually."

"Actually," Victoire replied loftily, "the concept of 'nothing' has been disputed; it is impossible to become nothing, instead matter disperses into nothing."

Molly's ears tinged red, and she read quickly to hide her embarrassment. " **The zoo director himself made Aunt Petunia a cup of strong, sweet tea while he apologised over and over again. Piers and Dudley could only gibber. As far as Harry had seen, the snake hadn't done anything except snap playfully at their heels as it passed, but by the time they were all back in Uncle Vernon's car, Dudley was telling them how it had nearly bitten off his leg, while Piers was swearing it had tried to squeeze him to death."**

"Pfft! Pathetic," said Louis.

"As if you wouldn't do the same," scoffed Victoire.

"Oi! I wouldn't be quite so dramatic. Especially not to the people who were there. Maybe once at Hogwarts, I'd make it a little more interesting..."

" **But worst of all, for Harry at least, was Piers calming down enough to say, "Harry was talking to it, weren't you, Harry?""**

Lily scowled again, "Oh, well done."

" **Uncle Vernon waited until Piers was safely out of the house before starting on Harry. He was so angry he could hardly speak. He managed to say, "Go — cupboard — stay — no meals,""**

"They can't starve him!" Albus cried out.

"Apparently they can," Louis replied grimly.

For once, Freddie remained silent, which pleased Roxanne, who never enjoyed it when she got associated with Freddie's often insensitive jokes.

"-**before he collapsed into a chair, and Aunt Petunia had to run and get him a large brandy.** **Harry lay in his dark cupboard much later, wishing he had a watch. He didn't know what time it was and he couldn't be sure the Dursleys were asleep yet. Until they were, he couldn't risk sneaking to the kitchen for some food.** "

"Least he's got some survival techniques," James reasoned, who had been getting more and more miserable as the book went on.

"**He'd lived with the Dursleys almost ten years, ten miserable years, as long as he could remember, ever since he'd been a baby and his parents had died in that car crash. He couldn't remember being in the car when his parents had died. Sometimes, when he strained his memory during long hours in his cupboard, he came up with a strange vision: a blinding flash of green light and a burning pain on his forehead."**

"Ugh," Rose shuddered, "imagine remembering that. Doesn't sound like a nice first memory."

"**This, he supposed, was the crash, though he couldn't imagine where all the green light came from. He couldn't remember his parents at all.** **His aunt and uncle never spoke about them, and of course he was forbidden to ask questions. There were no photographs of them in the house."**

"But Lily's her sister! Mum's got pictures of her sister in our house, even if we don't see them much, and if she died Mum would probably fill the house with them!" Lucy cried. Roxanne nodded, she'd imagine much the same for her mum; Dominique, Louis and Victoire were clearly all thinking about their aunt Gabrielle, and Fred Weasley the first appeared in each mind; every household with a Weasley had at least one picture of him (well, him and George, apparently there was only one picture of a single Weasley twin, one from when they were seven, and even George couldn't tell if it were him or Fred), and the Burrow had Fred (and George) grinning at them from nearly every room (it was the bathroom that didn't have one; a teenage Fred and George laughing at you when you're on the loo would be very off putting.

" **When he had been younger, Harry had dreamed and dreamed of some unknown relation coming to take him away,-"**

"I thought Dad had Sirius?" Lily asked. Rose and Teddy both made to answer but James got there first, "No, Sirius is in Azkaban until Dad's about thirteen." James was always very interested in any mention of Sirius; probably came from being named after him.

"**- but it had never happened;** **the Dursleys were his only family. Yet sometimes he thought (or maybe hoped) that strangers in the street seemed to know him. Very strange strangers they were, too.** **A tiny man in a violet top hat had bowed to him once while out shopping with Aunt Petunia and Dudley."**

"That's nice of him," smiled Lucy.

"**After asking Harry furiously if he knew the man, Aunt Petunia had rushed them out of the shop without buying anything.** **A wild-looking old woman dressed all in green had waved merrily at him once on a bus. A bald man in a very long purple coat had actually shaken his hand in the street the other day and then walked away without a word."**

"You don't think..." Molly had a thoughtful expression. They all looked at her, waiting for her to continue.

"Yeah?" prompted Teddy.

"The tiny man could be professor Flitwick; I'm sure he's got a violet top hat. And the bald man, shaking his hand sounds something dignified like Mr Shacklebolt would do."

"Hey, it could be actually," Teddy looked very interested.

" **The weirdest thing about all these people was the way they seemed to vanish the second Harry tried to get a closer look.** **At school, Harry had no one."**

Roxanne noticed the smiles from Harry's confusion droop, so quickly reminded everyone of how popular Harry was now.

"I s'pose he's not got this shit anymore," Dominique said thoughtfully. Lily grinned at her cousin, definitely relieved after having realised this.

" **Everybody knew that Dudley's gang hated that odd Harry Potter in his baggy old clothes and broken glasses, and nobody liked to disagree with Dudley's gang. **That's it," Molly put the book down.

"Hope this cheers up," Hugo said. James laughed.

"He's got Hogwarts soon, that's gotta be better," Lucy reasoned.

James clapped his hands. "Anyway. Shall we continue?"


	3. Chapter 3: The Letters from No One

**AN: Word of warning, the nasty nasty c-word occurs once in this, about half way through, from James about Dudley's second bedroom. Personally I don't find a problem with this word, but some people find it offensive (more so than f-word or others) and so I don't mean to offend.**

**Please enjoy, tell me what you don't like, maybe tell me what you do like? And chap four should be up within twenty-four hours... Hopefully...**

**Own nuffin'**

* * *

><p>Teddy and Victoire untangled themselves from each other. "I'm gonna take a quick slash," and out the door he went. Roxanne stretched out and jumped back, seemingly trying to get comfortable. There was a great deal of shuffling for they'd all been very still for the past hour and a half.<p>

Hugo stretched his arms and cracked his knuckles, causing many of them, Victoire mostly, to look at him in disgust.

By the time Teddy had returned, Molly and Lily had decided they needed the loo too, Roxanne jumped up, eager to continue her conversation with Lily, Albus and Scorpius had disappeared in search of food, Freddie and Hugo had started up Exploding Snap.

Everyone had returned twenty minutes later, including Louis and Dom, who James had sent off to bring up a load of snacks.

They were all comfortable and chatting quietly, eager for the next chapter, Louis had got up and was ready to read, when James realised how badly he needed to pee.

"We're starting in two minutes!" Louis yelled at him as he ran out the room.

"**Chapter Three: The Letters from No One," **Louis read, the moment James burst through the door.

"**The escape of the Brazilian boa constrictor earned Harry his longest-ever punishment.** **By the time he was allowed out of his cupboard again, the summer holidays had started-"**

"How can they do that to him?" Dominique cried. Albus couldn't understand how his father voluntarily still saw his cousin.

"- **and Dudley had already broken his new video camera, crashed his remote control airplane, and, first time out on his racing bike, knocked down old Mrs Figg as she crossed Privet Drive on her crutches."**

"Ouch! Poor woman," Lucy said, concerned.

"**Harry was glad school was over, but there was no escaping Dudley's gang, who visited the house every single day. Piers, Dennis, Malcolm, and Gordon were all big and stupid, but as Dudley was the biggest and stupidest of the lot, he was the leader."**

"Yes, that's what we all look for in a leader," Molly said sarcastically.

"**The rest of them were all quite happy to join in Dudley's favourite sport: Harry Hunting.** **This was why Harry spent as much time as possible out of the house, wandering around and thinking about the end of the holidays, where he could see a tiny ray of hope. When September came he would be going off to secondary school and, for the first time in his life, he wouldn't be with Dudley."**

"Blimey, imagine things being bad enough that you actually want t go to school," Freddie said, shaking his head. Roxanne scoffed. "Fred, I've seen you tick off the days until Hogwarts."

Freddie scowled.

" **Dudley had been accepted at Uncle Vernon's old private school, Smeltings.** **Piers Polkiss was going there too. Harry, on the other hand, was going to Stonewall High,** **the local comprehensive school. Dudley thought this was very funny."**

"He's obviously got no sense of humour then," Hugo muttered.

"**They stuff people's heads down the toilet the first day at Stonewall," he told Harry. "Want to come upstairs and practice?"**

"**No, thanks," said Harry. "The poor toilet's never had anything as horrible as your head down it — it might be sick." **

They all laughed at this, James grinning and nodding his head as he did so, as if reminding them that this was his father.

**Then he ran,-"**

"Aw, c'mon Dad, you were doing so well!" James put his head in his hands – but was clearly joking.

"**-before Dudley could work out what he'd said.** **One day in July, Aunt Petunia took Dudley to London to buy his Smeltings uniform, leaving Harry at Mrs Figg's. Mrs Figg wasn't as bad as usual. It turned out she'd broken her leg tripping over one of her cats, and she didn't seem quite as fond of them as before. She let Harry watch television and gave him a bit of chocolate cake that tasted as though she'd had it for several years."**

"Yum," muttered Dom.

"**That evening, Dudley paraded around the living room for the family in his brand-new uniform. Smeltings' boys wore maroon tailcoats,** **orange knickerbockers,** **and flat straw hats called boaters."**

"Seriously? That sounds disgusting," Molly pulled a face. "I'm guessing it's a boys only school."

"Probably for the best, given they've got boys like Vernon and Dudley going," Dominique added.

" **They also carried knobbly sticks, used for hitting each other while the teachers weren't looking. This was supposed to be good training for later life."**

"How? I certainly don't go around hitting my colleagues with knobbly sticks," said Teddy.

Louis grinned. "Yeah, that's what he tells you, Vic," he chortled.

"**As he looked at Dudley in his new knickerbockers, Uncle Vernon said gruffly that it was the proudest moment of his life.** **Aunt Petunia burst into tears and said she couldn't believe it was her Ickle Dudleykins, he looked so handsome and grown-up. Harry didn't trust himself to speak. He thought two of his ribs might already have cracked from trying not to laugh."**

"Feeling that way myself," grinned James.

"Knickerbockers. They even sound awful," Freddie said. A thought struck him and he leaned over the bean bag to Roxanne. "D'you reckon Dad could make something about them?"

"I've got an idea," James shouted out. "Knicker-blockers! Contraceptive device or something?" He laughed at how his younger cousins and siblings didn't understand.

"**There was a horrible smell in the kitchen the next morning when Harry went in for breakfast. It seemed to be coming from a large metal tub in the sink. He went to have a look. The tub was full of what looked like dirty rags swimming in grey water.**

"**What's this?" he asked Aunt Petunia. Her lips tightened as they always did if he dared to ask a question.**

"**Your new school uniform," she said.** **Harry looked in the bowl again.**

"**Oh," he said, "I didn't realise it had to be so wet."**

"**Don't be stupid," snapped Aunt Petunia. "I'm dyeing some of Dudley's old things grey for you. It'll look just like everyone else's when I've finished."** **Harry seriously doubted this, but thought it best not to argue."**

Teddy snorted softly. "Good instincts there..."

"I'm sure," Victoire said acidly, "that it wouldn't cost them too much to buy him a uniform of his own."

"I'm sure they'd rather spend their money on their twat of a son," Dominique responded.

"**He sat down at the table and tried not to think about how he was going to look on his first day at Stonewall High — like he was wearing bits of old elephant skin, probably.** **Dudley and Uncle Vernon came in, both with wrinkled noses because of the smell from Harry's new uniform. Uncle Vernon opened his newspaper as usual and Dudley banged his Smelting stick, which he carried everywhere, on the table.** **They heard the click of the letter-box and flop of letters on the doormat.**

"**Get the post, Dudley," said Uncle Vernon from behind his paper.**

"**Make Harry get it."**

"**Get the post, Harry."**

"**Make Dudley get it."**

"**Poke him with your Smelting stick, Dudley.""**

"Charming."

"**Harry dodged the Smelting stick and went to get the post. Three things lay on the doormat: a postcard from Uncle Vernon's sister Marge, who was holidaying on the Isle of Wight, a brown envelope that looked like a bill and—**_**a letter for Harry**_**. "**

"Hogwarts!" cheered Albus, Scorpius, Freddie and Roxanne.

"**Harry picked it up and stared at it, his heart twanging like a giant elastic band. No one, ever, in his whole life, had written to him. Who would? He had no friends, no other relatives — he didn't belong to the library, so he'd never even got rude notes asking for books back. Yet here it was, a letter, addressed so plainly there could be no mistake:**

_**Mr H. Potter**_

_**The Cupboard under the Stairs **_

_**4 Privet Drive**_

_**Little Whinging**_

_**Surrey**_

**The envelope was thick and heavy, made of yellowish parchment, and the address was written in emerald-green ink.** **There was no stamp.** **Turning the envelope over, his hand trembling, Harry saw a purple wax seal bearing a coat of arms; a lion, an eagle, a badger, and a snake surrounding a large letter**_**H**_**."**

Teddy smiled wistfully. "I remember that letter. Miss that place so much." Victoire smiled softly at him and snuggled up closer. "Me too."

"Think you two are forgetting about the teachers," Freddie shuddered. "I mean, Neville's all right when he's not telling you to go back to bed before he calls McGonagall, but that Clearwater's got it in for me!"

"That's because you thought it'd be funny to cover her in dirt and call her 'Murkywater'," Roxanne reminded him.

"See? She can't even take a joke, come on."

""**Hurry up, boy!" shouted Uncle Vernon from the kitchen. "What are you doing, checking for letter bombs?" He chuckled at his own joke."**

"Yeah, really funny that was. My sides hurt from containing my laughter," Dominique scoffed, raising her carefully shaped eyebrow.

"**Harry**** went back to the kitchen, still staring at his letter. He handed Uncle Vernon the bill and the postcard, sat down, and slowly began to open the yellow envelope."**

"What, in front of them?" James looked shocked.

"Dad, don't be stupid, take it to your roo- uh, cupboard." Lily willed. She winced slightly saying 'cupboard' instead of bedroom.

"**Uncle Vernon ripped open the bill, snorted in disgust, and flipped over the postcard.**

"**Marge's ill," he informed Aunt Petunia. "Ate a funny whelk…"**

"**Dad!" said Dudley suddenly. "Dad, Harry's got something!""**

"Oh, shut up, will you?" Albus snapped. Roxanne and Lily had both groaned as Louis read that, and James looked like he very much wanted to punch Dudley Dursley in the face.

**Harry was on the point of unfolding his letter,** **which was written on the same heavy parchment as the envelope, when it was jerked sharply out of his hand by Uncle Vernon."**

"I thought Uncle Harry was clever," Freddie raised an eyebrow. "Surely even he could tell it'd be sensible to open it in the hall."

"Hah! Fred Weasley lecturing someone on being sensible?"

Freddie scowled at Hugo.

""**That's**_**mine**_**!" said Harry, trying to snatch it back."**

"Go on, use your seeker skills!" Hugo urged desperately.

"He wouldn't have a clue what a seeker is," Molly pointed out, adjusting her position.

"He still would have the skills which make him a good seeker," said Lucy.

"Oh, look, does it really matter?" Rose huffed impatiently. "He's done it already!" Freddie caught Hugo's eye and they both sniggered.

""**Who'd be writing to you?" sneered Uncle Vernon, shaking the letter open with one hand and glancing at it. His face went from red to green faster than a set of traffic lights."**

"He just skipped out orange! The best colour there is!" Hugo interrupted. In doing so, he pulled the sleeve of his orange hooded jumper and gestured at the vivid red heads in the room.

"**And it didn't stop there. Within seconds it was the greyish white of old porridge. **

"**P-P-Petunia!" he gasped.** **Dudley tried to grab the letter to read it, but Uncle Vernon held it high out of his reach. Aunt Petunia took it curiously and read the first line. For a moment it looked as though she might faint. She clutched her throat and made a choking noise."**

"It's not like the letter is poisoning her," Lily muttered.

"**Vernon! Oh my goodness — Vernon!"**

**They stared at each other, seeming to have forgotten that Harry and Dudley were still in the room. Dudley wasn't used to being ignored. He gave his father a sharp tap on the head with his Smelting stick."**

"Imagine if I did that to Dad. I think he'd set a snake on me," said Albus, shaking his head.

"Might want to rephrase that, mate," Teddy said, shaking his head. "Sounds a bit wrong." Albus frowned, trying to puzzle it out. James and Louis laughed at him, although, to be fair to him, it was a little tenuous an innuendo.

""**I want to read that letter," he said loudly."**

Lily twitched her eyes. "Why on earth would he get to read it? It's nothing to do with him."

"He's a nosy twat?" James offered. Teddy snorted.

"_**I**_**want to read it," said Harry furiously, "as it's**_**mine**_**.""**

"Exactly! Give him his letter!" Lucy cried out.

"**OUT!" roared Uncle Vernon, and he took both Harry and Dudley by the scruffs of their necks-"**

Victoire made a sound of disgust. Vernon Dursley was an awful human being, and she didn't want someone close to her having lived with this awful man. Teddy held her close but had a similar look of anger on his face.

"-** and threw them into the hall,** **slamming the kitchen door behind them. Harry and Dudley promptly had a furious but silent fight over who would listen at the keyhole; Dudley won, so Harry,** **his glasses dangling from one ear, lay flat on his stomach to listen at the crack between door and floor."**

"Well, it seems Dudley learns a lot from his father," Dominique said, scowling.

"**Vernon," Aunt Petunia was saying in a quivering voice, "look at the address — how could they possibly know where he sleeps? You don't think they're watching the house?"**

"**Watching — spying — might be following us," muttered Uncle Vernon wildly."**

Louis snorted, "Yeah, they've probably got much better things to do then spend weeks watching the Dursleys."

"And," added Molly, "I like to think if they were watching, they'd intervene with how Harry's treated." Molly certainly hoped so, or she'd lost all faith in Professors McGonagall and Dumbledore.

""**But what should we do, Vernon? Should we write back? Tell them we don't want —"** **Harry could see Uncle Vernon's shiny black shoes pacing up and down the kitchen.**

"**No," he said finally. "No, we'll ignore it. If they don't get an answer… Yes, that's best… we won't do anything…""**

"Ignoring the issue never works," James said, shaking his head sadly, "learnt that from experience. I tried to ignore Albie from day one, but he's still here."

"Hey!"

""**But —"**

"**I'm not having one in the house, Petunia! Didn't we swear when we took him in we'd stamp out that dangerous nonsense?""**

Victoire was outraged. "You can't stamp it out!" she cried. "It's who he is!"

Lucy nodded. "They should let him be who he is," she said.

"**That evening when he got back from work, Uncle Vernon did something he'd never done before; he visited Harry in his cupboard.**

"**Where's my letter?" said Harry, the moment Uncle Vernon had squeezed through the door."**

"Hope that was painful," James said savagely. Louis was marvelling that the man fit in, and by the expressions on Freddie's, Hugo's, Roxanne's and Dominique's faces, they were marvelling the same. Albus had a picture of the man getting wedged in, unable to get out, and snorted at the image of his father stuck looking at the backside of an immensely fat man which blocked the only exit.

" **"Who's writing to me?"**

"**No one. It was addressed to you by mistake," said Uncle Vernon shortly."**

"Clearly Mr Potter would know that's a lie," scoffed Scorpius, "It even had where he slept on it."

"**I have burned it."**

"**It was**_**not**_**a mistake," said Harry angrily, "it had my cupboard on it.""**

"Exactly!" Scorpius interrupted quickly, as if they had been disputing his earlier comment.

Rose rolled her eyes. "No one even argued with that, Scorpius."

""**SILENCE!" yelled Uncle Vernon, and a couple of spiders fell from the ceiling.** **He took a few deep breaths and then forced his face into a smile, which looked quite painful."**

At this, the Potters, Scorpius, Freddie, Victoire and Teddy all snorted.

""**Er — yes, Harry — about this cupboard. Your aunt and I have been thinking… you're really getting a bit big for it… we think it might be nice if you moved into Dudley's second bedroom."**

Lily seethed. "Their son has two bedrooms and they shove my father into a cupboard?"

"That's just bloody ridiculous," James near shouted, "They're actually cunts!"

"James!" Molly chastised. "Don't use that word! It's disgusting!"

"It's just a swear word," James said through gritted teeth; Molly's patronising telling off didn't help his anger – she wasn't his bloody mother!

"What does it mean?" Hugo asked. Freddie grinned and leaned over to explain, but Molly cast a quick silencing charm on him.

"Freddie, he does not need to know," she said firmly.

Lily, who clearly hadn't been listening to any of this, muttered "two rooms!" again, with great incredulousness.

"That's awful," Victoire agreed. Teddy thought about the man he'd met quite a few times and couldn't believe that Dudley Dursley, the big, mild-mannered and polite man, had once been such a spoilt boy.

""**Why?" said Harry.**

"**Don't ask questions!" snapped his uncle. "Take this stuff upstairs, now."** **The Dursleys' house had four bedrooms:-"**

"So they've got _another_ spare room!" Albus shouted. He couldn't believe this selfishness. His father did not deserve this!

Lily was apparently too disgusted to even speak, and Lucy's delicate face suddenly looked so harsh in anger and disgust at this. She believed everyone and everything should be treated equally, or at least to an equal amount of respect, so it was very strange to see such dislike on her face. Molly did have some pride at her little sister – Molly was always worried Lucy would stubbornly see only good, and then be hurt in the future.

Roxanne shook her head in disgust. This was just disgraceful, really.

"-** one for Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia, one for visitors (usually Uncle Vernon's sister, Marge), one where Dudley slept, and one where Dudley kept all the toys and things that wouldn't fit into his first bedroom."**

"Surely," Rose said through gritted teeth, "surely it would make an awful lot more sense if they put the toys he didn't want into the cupboard, instead of putting the nephew they don't want in it."

" **It only took Harry one trip upstairs to move everything he owned from the cupboard to this room. He sat down on the bed and stared around him. Nearly everything in here was broken. The month-old video camera was lying on top of a small, working tank Dudley had once driven over the next door neighbour's dog; in the corner was Dudley's first-ever television set, which he'd put his foot through when his favourite program had been cancelled; there was a large birdcage, which had once held a parrot that Dudley had swapped at school for a real air rifle,-"**

"Why would you swap a parrot? I'd love a parrot," remarked Freddie. "Imagine having a parrot deliver your post, when everyone else has boring owls."

"Owls," Hugo said, with a menacing tone (which Louis laughed at, given that Hugo was short and weedy, with quite a high-pitched voice. Menacing was never linked to Hugo Weasley), "are wonderful. Don't diss them."

"All right, all right, chill, cuz," Freddie grinned easily, holding up a jokey hand.

"-**which was up on a shelf with the end all bent because Dudley had sat on it. Other shelves were full of books. They were the only things in the room that looked as though they'd never been touched.**"

"It shows," scoffed Dominique.

"**From downstairs came the sound of Dudley bawling at his mother, "I don't**_**want**_**him in there… I**_**need**_**that room… make him get out…""**

"Bollocks," Teddy muttered, "he doesn't need that room, he's just being a spoilt brat."

"Agreed," James nodded darkly – his brow was furrowed, that's what made it a dark nod.

"**Harry**** sighed and stretched out on the bed. Yesterday he'd have given anything to be up here. Today he'd rather be back in his cupboard with that letter than up here without it.** **Next morning at breakfast, everyone was rather quiet. Dudley was in shock. He'd screamed, whacked his father with his Smelting stick, been sick on purpose, kicked his mother, and thrown his tortoise through the greenhouse roof-"**

"WHAT?" cried Lucy. "That's HORRIBLE!"

Lily attempted to raise an eyebrow at her, leading to James mocking her attempts. She ignored James, and said "My dad has been treated awfully through this whole book, and its the tortoise you're worried about?"

"Your dad's hardly defenceless, though. What can a tortoise do if it's chucked through the roof of a greenhouse?" Luc y snapped.

Louis diplomatically continued reading, "**- and he still didn't have his room back.** **Harry was thinking about this time yesterday and bitterly wishing he'd opened the letter in the hall."**

"So now he sees sense," James muttered.

"Cut him some slack," Freddie grinned, "It's not like he's had much experience of opening letters he doesn't want other people to read."

"You know," Rose mused, "it would make it all so much easier if they sent a Howler to tell Uncle Harry about Hogwarts. There isn't much they could do about a Howler."

They all nodded; the girl had a point.

"Although," reasoned Lucy, "it would be a bit more of a shock to have a red letter yelling at you."

"I'm sure they'd get through it," Albus muttered.

"But they could like, faint, or something," Lucy continued.

"But Petunia must know about magic. It would have been in the letter, and her sister was a witch, and she clearly knows Uncle Harry's a wizard. She wouldn't faint," Rose countered.

"Oh, that's true..."

"**Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia kept looking at each other darkly.** **When the post arrived, Uncle Vernon, who seemed to be trying to be nice to Harry,-"**

"Scared, perhaps?" Teddy smiled.

"-** made Dudley go and get it.** **They heard him banging things with his Smelting stick all the way down the hall."**

"Can you get more childish?" Lily scoffed, in the tone Molly often used.

James grinned, "Yup. And I'm talking to it."

Lily scowled. "Bite me."

" **Then he shouted, "There's another one! 'Mr H. Potter, the Smallest Bedroom, 4 Privet Drive —'"** **With a strangled cry, Uncle Vernon leapt from his seat and ran down the hall, Harry right behind him. Uncle Vernon had to wrestle Dudley to the ground to get the letter from him, which was made difficult by the fact that Harry had grabbed Uncle Vernon around the neck from behind."**

Louis snorted, but Albus and Hugo looked quite impressed with Harry's courage. They could imagine Uncle Vernon could throw Harry quite far.

" **After a minute of confused fighting, in which everyone got hit a lot by the Smelting stick,-"**

"See, this stick is a bloody awful idea!" Lucy cried out.

Molly swatted James' head.

"Oi, what did I do?"

"You keep swearing! It's a bad influence on Lucy!"

Lucy rolled her eyes in a very exaggerated manner, in irritation. "I'm thirteen. I'll bloody well swear if I want to!"

"No you won't!" Molly bristled. Lucy, looking an awful lot like her aunt Ginny, held her sister's glare, and matched it.

Louis quickly resumed reading, "-**Uncle Vernon straightened up, gasping for breath, with Harry's letter clutched in his hand.**

"**Go to your cupboard — I mean, your bedroom," he wheezed at Harry. "Dudley — go — just go."** **Harry walked round and round his new room. Someone knew he had moved out of his cupboard and they seemed to know he hadn't received his first letter. Surely that meant they'd try again?"**

"Course they would," Teddy said firmly. "It's Hogwarts. They're nothing if not determined."

"Yeah," James nodded, "after I managed to spike the professors' drinks, they relentlessly tried to get me in trouble, even though they had no proof. In the end I had a hell of a detention for breaking a potions vial."

Dominique snorted, "James, you deserve everything you get, and more."

James seemed a little unsure on how to take this, so settled for a half-hearted grin.

" **And this time he'd make sure they didn't fail. He had a plan.** **The repaired alarm clock rang at six o'clock the next morning."**

"That's no time to be up," Scorpius shook his head.

Albus and Dominique snorted. Giving a meaningful look at James, Albus said, "sometimes certain Quidditch captains like to wake us up at this time for some practise. No one should have to wake up at that hour; it's wrong."

" **Harry turned it off quickly and dressed silently. He mustn't wake the Dursleys. He stole downstairs without turning on any of the lights.** **He was going to wait for the postman on the corner of Privet Drive and get the letters for number four first. His heart hammered as he crept across the dark hall toward the front door —**

"**AAAAARRRGH!"**

"He's not..." James groaned.

"**Harry leapt into the air; he'd trodden on something big and squashy on the doormat — something**_**alive**_**!** **Lights clicked on upstairs and to his horror Harry realised that the big, squashy something had been his uncle's face."**

Roxanne grinned. "Honestly, Uncle Harry just walks over everyone."

There was a lot of moaning at this poor joke, but Louis and Teddy both laughed loudly.

"**Uncle Vernon had been lying at the foot of the front door in a sleeping bag, clearly making sure that Harry didn't do exactly what he'd been trying to do. He shouted at Harry for about half an hour-"**

"He was only trying to get what was rightfully his!" Lily said heatedly.

"Well, he did step on Vernon's face," Rose reminded her.

"Oh, yeah. Yeah, I'd be a bit annoyed if someone stood on my face," Lily replied.

"Yeah, just a bit annoyed," Teddy laughed.

"-** and then told him to go and make a cup of tea. Harry shuffled miserably off into the kitchen and by the time he got back, the post had arrived, right into Uncle Vernon's lap. Harry could see three letters addressed in green ink."**

"Bad luck, Uncle Harry," Freddie shook his head slowly.

"**I want —" he began, but Uncle Vernon was tearing the letters into pieces before his eyes.** **Uncle Vernon didn't go to work that day.** **He stayed at home and nailed up the letter-box.**

"**See," he explained to Aunt Petunia through a mouthful of nails, "if they can't**_**deliver**_**them they'll just give up.""**

"Well, that's not likely," Hugo said matter-of-factly.

""**I'm not sure that'll work, Vernon.""**

James clapped. "Crazy, but the woman speaks sense!"

"**Oh, these people's minds work in strange ways, Petunia, they're not like you and me," said Uncle Vernon, trying to knock in a nail with the piece of fruitcake Aunt Petunia had just brought him."**

Sniggers circulated the room.

"And I think we're very glad about that," Dominique added.

"Actually," Freddie said thoughtfully, "I'd use Hagrid's cakes as hammers."

"I threw one at Josh Kelley last year," said James. "Knocked him straight out. They're good ammo."

"**On Friday, no less than twelve letters arrived for Harry. As they couldn't go through the letter-box they had been pushed under the door, slotted through the sides, and a few even forced through the small window in the downstairs bathroom."**

"See? Hogwarts needs Uncle Harry," Lucy said. "They wouldn't dream of giving up."

" **Uncle Vernon stayed at home again. After burning all the letters, he got out a hammer and nails and boarded up the cracks around the front and back doors so no one could go out. He hummed "Tiptoe Through the Tulips" as he worked, and jumped at small noises."**

"Sounds like he's cracking up," murmured Dominique.

"**On Saturday, things began to get out of hand. Twenty-four letters to Harry found their way into the house, rolled up and hidden inside each of the two-dozen eggs that their very confused milkman had handed Aunt Petunia through the living room window."**

James snorted, trying to imagine the scene.

"You'd think his aunt and uncle would get the message that they wouldn't give up," Rose said.

"You'd also think they'd be nice enough to give their nephew a proper room," Scorpius added.

"That's true, I suppose," Rose said sadly.

"**While Uncle Vernon made furious telephone calls to the post office and the dairy trying to find someone to complain to, Aunt Petunia shredded the letters in her food processor.**

"**Who on earth wants to talk to**_**you**_**this badly?" Dudley asked Harry in amazement."**

"The whole entire Wizarding World, I'm guessing," grinned Louis.

" **On Sunday morning, Uncle Vernon sat down at the breakfast table looking tired and rather ill, but happy.**

"**No post on Sundays," he reminded them cheerfully as he spread marmalade on his newspapers-**

"Definitely cracking up," nodded Hugo.

**"no damn letters today —"** **Something came whizzing down the kitchen chimney as he spoke-"**

"Galleon says it's a letter," Scorpius muttered to Albus.

"That'd be a total waste of a galleon," Albus muttered back.

"-** and caught him sharply on the back of the head. Next moment, thirty or forty letters came pelting out of the fireplace like bullets. The Dursleys ducked, but Harry leapt into the air trying to catch one —**

"**Out! OUT!"** **Uncle Vernon seized Harry around the waist and threw him into the hall."**

"Take your bloody hands off my father!" Albus shouted out in frustration. He really hoped Harry would get the letter soon, so he could get to the security and wonderment of Hogwarts.

" **When Aunt Petunia and Dudley had run out with their arms over their faces, Uncle Vernon slammed the door shut. They could hear the letters still streaming into the room, bouncing off the walls and floor.**

"**That does it," said Uncle Vernon, trying to speak calmly but pulling great tufts out of his moustache at the same time. "I want you all back here in five minutes ready to leave. We're going away. Just pack some clothes. No arguments!"** **He looked so dangerous with half his moustache missing that no one dared argue."**

"I certainly wouldn't," James muttered. Louis pretended to drop the book in horror.

"Of course you would, James. You'd irritate him more for fun," Lily sighed at her brother.

"I don't think I would, actually," he said doubtfully, but before he could continue, Lily replied with "I don't think you think at all."

"Oh, great one Lil. Really witty." James replied, eyebrow raised.

"**Ten minutes later they had wrenched their way through the boarded-up doors and were in the car, speeding toward the highway. Dudley was sniffling in the back seat; his father had hit him round the head for holding them up while he tried to pack his television, video recorder, and computer in his sports bag."**

"He still shouldn't _hit_ him!" Lily cried out. Albus was in mixed minds; he still hated the thought of a father hitting his son, but couldn't hide the small satisfaction that he was being treated similarly to how Harry had been treated.

**They drove. And they drove. Even Aunt Petunia didn't dare ask where they were going. Every now and then Uncle Vernon would take a sharp turn and drive in the opposite direction for a while.**

"**Shake 'em off… shake 'em off," he would mutter whenever he did this."**

James looked scared. "Blimey, don't even think that's funny any more. I'd be terrified if I were Dad." Albus and Lily nodded in agreement.

"**They didn't stop to eat or drink all day. By nightfall Dudley was howling. He'd never had such a bad day in his life. He was hungry, he'd missed five television programs he'd wanted to see, and he'd never gone so long without blowing up an alien on his computer."**

"He deserves that," Victoire said angrily. Albus, who generally saw the best in people, surprised them all by nodding. Even Lucy gave the impression of agreeing, but didn't let on her true mind. And this was that Dudley did deserve to be ignored for a bit. She hoped it did him well.

**Uncle Vernon stopped at last outside a gloomy-looking hotel on the outskirts of a big city. Dudley and Harry shared a room with twin beds and damp, musty sheets. Dudley snored but Harry stayed awake, sitting on the windowsill, staring down at the lights of passing cars and wondering…** **They ate stale cornflakes and cold tinned tomatoes on toast for breakfast the next day."**

"That sounds like a disgusting breakfast," shuddered Louis, interrupting himself. He was thankful that Fleur was a fantastic cook and kept the larder fully stocked at all times. Teddy, on the other hand, didn't think this sounded too bad. Teddy currently lived alone, with a full time job and wonderful girlfriend. He didn't shop much, and neither did he bother learning to cook – well, Victoire was always being encouraged to cook by Fleur, and he always had Molly or a multitude of other adults he could get to cook for him.

Except for Hermione. Ron could now cook better than she could.

"'**Scuse me, but is one of you Mr H. Potter? Only I got about an 'undred of these at the front desk."** **She held up a letter so they could read the green ink address:**

_**Mr H. Potter**_

_**Room 17**_

_**Railview Hotel**_

_**Cokeworth**_

**Harry made a grab for the letter but Uncle Vernon knocked his hand out of the way. The woman stared."**

"Good! Tell someone he's being mistreated!" Lucy cried.

"Won't help Uncle Harry much. He'll get to Hogwarts anyway, we know that," Rose told her.

"**I'll take them," said Uncle Vernon, standing up quickly and following her from the dining room.**

"**Wouldn't it be better just to go home, dear?" Aunt Petunia suggested timidly, hours later, but Uncle Vernon didn't seem to hear her.** **Exactly what he was looking for, none of them knew. He drove them into the middle of a forest, got out, looked around, shook his head, got back in the car, and off they went again. The same thing happened in the middle of a ploughed field, halfway across a suspension bridge, and at the top of a multilevel parking garage."**

"Blimey, that sounds pretty scary, actually," Louis said.

"**Daddy's gone mad, hasn't he?" Dudley asked Aunt Petunia dully late that afternoon."**

"I don't really fancy saying this, but I reckon Dudley's right," Hugo sighed.

"And I never thought I'd say this, but I think Hugo's right too," Roxanne replied. Hugo scowled at her.

" **Uncle Vernon had parked at the coast, locked them all inside the car, and disappeared.** **It started to rain. Great drops beat on the roof of the car. Dudley snivelled.**

"**It's Monday," he told his mother. "The Great Humberto's on tonight.""**

"The _what?_ Lily giggled. "That sounds ridiculous."

"" **I want to stay somewhere with a**_**television**_**."** **Monday.** **This reminded Harry of something. If it**_**was**_**Monday — and you could usually count on Dudley to know the days the week, because of television — then tomorrow, Tuesday, was Harry's eleventh birthday.** **Of course, his birthdays were never exactly fun — last year, the Dursleys had given him a coat hanger and a pair of Uncle Vernon's old socks."**

"Ouch," James said, shaking his head. "And to think, when I was ten, Dad got me – well, I forget, but it was something good."

"At least," Lucy tried to be optimistic, "at least they don't ignore it completely."

"I wouldn't have thought they could do that, given how much they celebrate Dudley's," Rose replied. Lucy wrinkled her nose. "Yeah, that's probably true, actually."

"**Still, you weren't eleven every day.** **Uncle Vernon was back and he was smiling.** **He was also carrying a long, thin package and didn't answer Aunt Petunia when she asked what he'd bought.**

"**Found the perfect place!" he said. "Come on! Everyone out!"** **It was very cold outside the car. Uncle Vernon was pointing at what looked like a large rock way out at sea. Perched on top of the rock was the most miserable little shack you could imagine. One thing was certain, there was no television in there."**

Molly gasped. "He's not serious, is he?"

Louis glanced ahead, and nodded, slightly bemuse to the lengths 'Uncle Vernon' was going in vain.

"**Storm forecast for tonight!" said Uncle Vernon gleefully,-"**

"'Gleefully'," repeated Rose, "gleeful about a storm when they're surrounded by sea?"

"-** clapping his hands together. "And this gentleman's kindly agreed to lend us his boat!"** **A toothless old man came ambling up to them, pointing, with a rather wicked grin, at an old rowboat bobbing in the iron-grey water below them.**

"**I've already got us some rations," said Uncle Vernon, "so all aboard!"**

**It was freezing in the boat. Icy sea spray and rain crept down their necks and a chilly wind whipped their faces. After what seemed like hours they reached the rock, where Uncle Vernon, slipping and sliding, led the way to the broken-down house.** **The inside was horrible; it smelled strongly of seaweed, the wind whistled through the gaps in the wooden walls, and the fireplace was damp and empty. There were only two rooms.** **Uncle Vernon's rations turned out to be a bag of crisps each and four bananas."**

"Bloody hell, they must be starving! Only crisps, a banana, some tomatoes and some cornflakes all day, " said Dominique. Hugo looked dismayed at prospect of this dismal excuse for dinner.

Freddie glanced up, a familiar sensation in his stomach. "Speaking of food..."

James threw some chocolate frogs at his cousin's head, and was slightly irritated to see that he caught each of them.

"**He tried to start a fire but the empty crisp bags just smoked and shrivelled up.**

"**Could do with some of those letters now, eh?" he said cheerfully.** **He was in a very good mood. Obviously he thought nobody stood a chance of reaching them here in a storm to deliver post.** **Harry privately agreed, though the thought didn't cheer him up at all."**

"Have more faith in magic, Uncle Harry," Lucy said.

"Bit hard as he doesn't know magic," Molly countered.

"**As night fell, the promised storm blew up around them. Spray from the high waves splattered the walls of the hut and a fierce wind rattled the filthy windows."**

"Why would you choose to stay in a place like that?" Dominique asked, although she didn't expect an answer.

"If they believe old Muggle superstitions," Teddy began, and noticed that the faces were blank, "well, there's old superstitions that witches can't cross water."

"Well, that's nonsense," Molly scoffed.

"But they don't know that," Teddy replied patiently.

"**Aunt Petunia found a few mouldy blankets in the second room and made up a bed for Dudley on the moth-eaten sofa. She and Uncle Vernon went off to the lumpy bed next door, and Harry was left to find the softest bit of floor he could and to curl up under the thinnest, most ragged blanket."**

"'Course," Albus muttered angrily, "don't worry about your nephew. He's just your dead sister's son."

" **The storm raged more and more ferociously as the night went on. Harry couldn't sleep. He shivered and turned over, trying to get comfortable,-"**

"Not likely; stone floors aren't too comfortable," James said.

"Yeah, you've had experience with that, have you?" Lily asked.

"I have, actually," James grinned. "This girl in Hufflepuff, I went out with her, really liked her, went out with her friend, tried to get back with this girl... she wouldn't see me, so I made a romantic bid for her affection and said I'd sleep outside the common room if I had to. She wouldn't come out."

"Smart girl," Albus muttered.

"-** his stomach rumbling with hunger. Dudley's snores were drowned by the low rolls of thunder that started near midnight. The lighted dial of Dudley's watch, which was dangling over the edge of the sofa on his fat wrist, told Harry he'd be eleven in ten minutes' time."**

"Ahh," Freddie said wistfully, "I remember that countdown. Tensest ten minutes of my life."

Roxanne snorted, "What, in case you suddenly turned nine by mistake?"

Freddie grumbled. "It's been known to happen..."

"To be fair," Teddy cut in, "you live above a joke shop. There is that de-aging sweet..."

"Exactly!" Freddie nodded ostentatiously at Teddy. Roxanne snorted again.

"**He lay and watched his birthday tick nearer, wondering if the Dursleys would remember at all, wondering where the letter writer was now."**

"I've got my suspicions," Teddy smiled.

"Five** minutes to go. Harry heard something creak outside. He hoped the roof wasn't going to fall in, although he might be warmer if it did.** **Four minutes to go. Maybe the house in Privet Drive would be so full of letters when they got back that he'd be able to steal one somehow."**

"He's got to get a letter," Lucy said, worried. They all had leaned in slightly, almost expectantly.

"Well, we know he gets the letter," Rose reasoned, "He DID go to Hogwarts, after all."

Lucy grinned quickly, "Oh, yeah."

" **Three minutes to go. Was that the sea, slapping hard on the rock like that?"**

"Oh, no, don't let it be something bad," Lily said desperately.

"**And (two minutes to go) what was that funny crunching noise? Was the rock crumbling into the sea?"**

Lily winced again, certain something bad was coming up. Molly was inclined to agree, and Teddy could feel Victoire getting more tense and rigid as every mention of something outside the hut was read.

" **One minute to go and he'd be eleven. Thirty seconds… twenty… ten… nine — maybe he'd wake Dudley up, just to annoy him**— **three… two… one…BOOM."**

During the countdown the tension had risen, everyone got steadily stiffer and more on edge, and Victoire and Teddy were the only ones not to jump when Louis shouted the word, and that only because Teddy had Victoire on him and Victoire had Teddy's arms around her.

"**The whole shack shivered and Harry sat bolt upright, staring at the door. Someone was outside, knocking to come in."**

Louis had fallen silent now that the chapter was over. He, like all of them, wanted very much to know who it was who'd found them, but found all of their anxious faces hilarious. He grinned easily at them, "All right, that's me done. Who next?"

Albus practically snatched the book of f of him.


	4. Chapter 4: The Keeper of the Keys

**AN: Bloody hell, I've done it again. Tomorrow you'll actually get an update on time. **

**Hopefully. **

**Oh, and I just wanted to point out that I adore Fred and George, and so I love Freddie and Roxanne. Freddie acts quite immaturely, and a bit like he's trying too hard to be funny -and so actually isn't at times. That's deliberate. The boy is twelve; I reckon he'll be funny when he's like, fourteen or older, but he's still really a little kid. I know no one's commented, but I just wanted to say that :L**

**I own nothing. **

**And drop a review by, will you? **

* * *

><p>Albus looked at the title and grinned. "<strong>Chapter Four: The Keeper of the Keys. BOOM.<strong> **They knocked again. Dudley jerked awake.**

"**Where's the cannon?" he said stupidly.** **There was a crash behind them and Uncle Vernon came skidding into the room. He was holding a rifle in his hands."**

"Rifle?" asked Louis, directing his question to Rose.

"They're like... a metal wand, I suppose. Muggles kill people with them. They're pretty lethal, I've heard."

The Potters and Weasleys all frowned.

" **Now they knew what had been in the long, thin package he had brought with them.**

"**Who's there?" he shouted. "I warn you — I'm armed!""**

James frowned. "Aren't most people?"

Rose laughed. "No, that means he's got a gun. They call them firearms, so say they're armed."

"Oh, Grandad's talked about them," piped up Lucy. "He never explained them properly though."

"**There was a pause. Then —** **SMASH!** **The door was hit with such force that it swung clean off its hinges and with a deafening crash landed flat on the floor.** **A giant of a man was standing in the doorway. His face was almost completely hidden by a long, shaggy mane of hair and a wild, tangled beard, but you could make out his eyes, glinting like black beetles under all the hair."**

"Hagrid!" they cheered.

"Quite fitting it being him, seeing how he brought Harry to the Dursley's, now he gets to take him away," mused Lily.

"**The giant squeezed his way into the hut, stooping so that his head just brushed the ceiling. He bent down, picked up the door, and fitted it easily back into its frame."**

"Bless, Hagrid the friendly half giant," Roxanne grinned, thinking of her friend. Every Weasley and Potter got along with Hagrid, and it seemed he entertained each of them every week.

"**The noise of the storm outside dropped a little. He turned to look at them all.**

"**Couldn't make us a cup o' tea, could yeh? It's not been an easy journey…"** **He strode over to the sofa where Dudley sat frozen with fear."**

"Well," Teddy smiled, "Harry likes to insist how cold it was. They're probably a bit frozen stiff too."

"**Budge up, yeh great lump," said the stranger."**

Louis snorted. "Don't think Hagrid can call anyone 'great', he's bloody massive!"

"He's a half giant," Teddy reminded him.

"Still!"

"Yup," Teddy grinned. "You don't lose who your mother is, LouLou."

Louis rolled his eyes.

"**Dudley squeaked and ran to hide behind his mother, who was crouching, terrified, behind Uncle Vernon."**

"Pfft! Pathetic," Freddie scoffed.

"**An' here's Harry!" said the giant.** **Harry looked up into the fierce, wild, shadowy face and saw that the beetle eyes were crinkled in a smile.**

"**Las' time I saw you, you was only a baby," said the giant. "Yeh look a lot like yer dad, but yeh've got yer mum's eyes.""**

Albus smiled. He'd inherited these, and he really did like them. His sister may have got her name, and his brother may have got _his_ name, but it was Albus who'd got the bright green Lily Evans eyes, and black messy James Potter hair (James' – James Sirius's – hair didn't count. It was red and much too long to be truly messy).

" **Uncle Vernon made a funny rasping noise.**

"**I demand that you leave at once, sir!" he said. "You are breaking and entering!"**

"**Ah, shut up, Dursley, yeh great prune,""**

"YUS! Good on you, Hagrid!" James cheered.

"About bloody time," Freddie grinned.

"_Prune_?" Roxanne said. Her face was completely baffled – who insulted each other by calling them prunes?

"-** said the giant;** **he reached over the back of the sofa, jerked the gun out of Uncle Vernon's hands, bent it into a knot as easily as if it had been made of rubber, and threw it into a corner of the room."**

There was more cheering at this action.

"**Uncle Vernon made another funny noise, like a mouse being trodden on.**

"**Anyway — Harry," said the giant, turning his back on the Dursleys, "a very happy birthday to yeh."**

"It's lovely how Hagrid remembered," Lily smiled. Victoire too smiled. Hagrid was such a lovely man.

" **Got summat fer yeh here — I mighta sat on it at some point, but it'll taste all right.""**

"Oh, Merlin no! Dad, don't eat it!" James moaned.

"I think the worst I ever had was a Victoria sponge cake, which tasted pretty funny, and then it was only when I'd found a bit of fur that I remembered he had that vole called Victoria..." Scorpius shuddered. That was the one time that Scorpius' father was right – that Scorpius shouldn't get himself associated with Hagrid (well, Draco had used some rather mean adjectives there too, but Scorpius ignored those).

"**From an inside pocket of his black overcoat he pulled a slightly squashed box. Harry opened it with trembling fingers. Inside was a large, sticky chocolate cake with**_**Happy Birthday Harry**_**written on it in green icing."**

"Hagrid is just so lovely," grinned Dominique. "Used to go down when I was cold after Quidditch; he'd always give me some nice tea and once you softened his cakes in the tea, they are nice."

" **Harry looked up at the giant. He meant to say thank you, but the words got lost on the way to his mouth, and what he said instead was, "Who are you?""**

"James, you've inherited his manners!" Louis yelled out. James scowled at him.

"**The giant chuckled.**

"**True, I haven't introduced myself. Rubeus Hagrid, Keeper of Keys and Grounds at Hogwarts."**

**He held out an enormous hand and shook Harry's whole arm."**

Teddy laughed, "Yeah, he did that to me too."

"And me," James grinned.

"Me too!" Lucy nodded vigorously.

"And us," grinned Freddie and Roxanne.

**"****What about that tea then, eh?" he said, rubbing his hands together. "I'd not say no ter summat stronger if yeh've got it, mind."**

"'Course you wouldn't," Teddy smiled, shaking his head.

**His eyes fell on the empty grate with the shrivelled crisp bags in it and he snorted. He bent down over the fireplace; they couldn't see what he was doing but when he drew back a second later, there was a roaring fire there.** **It filled the whole damp hut with flickering light and Harry felt the warmth wash over him as though he'd sunk into a hot bath.** **The giant sat back down on the sofa, which sagged under his weight, and began taking all sorts of things out of the pockets of his coat:** **a copper kettle, a squashy package of sausages, a poker, a teapot-"**

"A teapot?" said Lucy in disbelief.

"Know what you mean," Roxanne nodded, "just imagine if you sat on it by accident."

"**- several chipped mugs, and a bottle of some amber liquid that he took a swig from before starting to make tea."**

Teddy shook his head again, in amusement. "I'm surprised he's not gotten into trouble for drinking," he said.

Rose piped up, sounding knowledgeable, as per usual, "Actually, Hagrid's giant blood will make alcohol affect him less, so it must take him a lot to get him even slightly intoxicated."

Teddy raised his eyes; that explained a lot. Hagrid spent the 2nd of May remembrance celebrations sipping from strong alcohol (quite a few people did this, actually. Teddy could just about remember a year when George and Percy had both got totally pissed in the middle of the day, and Dennis Creevey, Harry's friend, was often having alcohol wrestled from him) yet Teddy had only once seen him actually drunk.

"**Soon the hut was full of the sound and smell of sizzling sausage. Nobody said a thing while the giant was working, but as he slid the first six fat, juicy, slightly burnt sausages from the poker, Dudley fidgeted a little."**

So did Dominique. She was getting pretty hungry, and, like her father, loved her meat.

And this wasn't an innuendo.

"**Uncle Vernon said sharply, "Don't touch anything he gives you, Dudley.""**

"Like he needs it," James snorted.

" **The giant chuckled darkly.**

"**Yer great puddin' of a son don' need fattenin' anymore, Dursley, don' worry."**

**He passed the sausages to Harry, who was so hungry he had never tasted anything so wonderful, but he still couldn't take his eyes off the giant."**

"Granted he is a bit funny looking," chortled Teddy.

"He's brilliant!" Albus cried.

"I know, I know! Hagrid is brilliant, but, y'know, he's a bit..." Teddy trailed off, unsure how to finish without getting cushions thrown at him.

"Distinct?" Rose offered.

Teddy grinned. "Yeah, he's distinct."

This seemed to appease Albus and he quietened.

" **Finally, as nobody seemed about to explain anything, he said, "I'm sorry, but I still don't really know who you are.""**

"There we go," Lily smiled, "That's perfectly polite."

" **The giant took a gulp of tea and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.**

"**Call me Hagrid," he said, "everyone does. An' like I told yeh, I'm Keeper of Keys at Hogwarts — yeh'll know all about Hogwarts, o' course.**

"**Er — no," said Harry.** **Hagrid looked shocked.**

"**Sorry," Harry said quickly.**

"_**Sorry**_**?" barked Hagrid, turning to stare at the Dursleys, who shrank back into the shadows. "It's them as should be sorry!"**

"You tell them, Hagrid!" James cheered.

"**I knew yeh weren't gettin' yer letters but I never thought yeh wouldn't even know abou' Hogwarts, fer cryin' out loud! Did yeh never wonder where yer parents learned it all?"**

"**All what?" asked Harry."**

"Aw, he's all innocent, how adorable," Roxanne grinned.

""**ALL WHAT?" Hagrid thundered.**

"**Now wait jus' one second!"** **He had leapt to his feet. In his anger he seemed to fill the whole hut."**

"Never seen him angry," Lucy commented casually.

"I have," James and Freddie said together. Hugo, Roxanne and Louis were nodding knowingly too.

"He can get pretty shirty when you antagonise his 'pets'," Hugo smirked. Lucy looked aghast that they'd been upsetting animals, and Rose looked annoyed with her brother.

"I think it was the – what, fiftieth time we'd tried to get into the Forest?" James grinned.

Louis smiled too, but shook his head, "Get it right, it was about the fiftieth time Hagrid had caught us. We've got the other times that other teachers have caught us. And I prefer Hagrid's anger to McGonagall's, I'm not gonna lie."

" **The Dursleys were cowering against the wall.**

"**Do you mean ter tell me," he growled at the Dursleys, "that this boy — this boy! — knows nothin' abou' — about ANYTHING?"** **Harry thought this was going a bit far. He had been to school, after all, and his marks weren't bad.**

"**I know**_**some**_**things," he said. "I can, you know, do maths and stuff.""**

James snorted. "What even is maths?"

"Arithmancy to us," Rose replied, in the lofty voice she used when she (inadvertently, they hoped) reminded the others how well read and knowledgeable she was (just like her mother).

"**But Hagrid simply waved his hand and said, "About**_**our**_**world, I mean.**_**Your**_**world.**_**My**_**world.**_**Yer parents' world**_**."**

"**What world?""**

"The wondrous world of the wacky, weird and wonderful –" Hugo began.

"-And Weasleys," Freddie added, - Scorpius grinned at this, it was true, you could scarcely spend ten minutes in the Wizarding World without bumping into a red haired, freckle faced Weasley (Roxanne and Freddie still counted as this, even though they had much darker hair and no freckles).

"The wonderful Wizarding World!" Lucy and Roxanne cheered.

"**Hagrid looked as if he was about to explode.**

"**DURSLEY!" he boomed.**

**Uncle Vernon, who had gone very pale, whispered something that sounded like "Mimblewimble."**

**Hagrid stared wildly at Harry. "But yeh must know about yer mum and dad," he said. "I mean, they're**_**famous**_**. You're**_**famous**_**."**

"**What? My — my mum and dad weren't famous, were they?""**

"Just a bit," chortled Hugo.

"Yeah," Albus grinned, "There's only a couple of monuments in their honour, a few books mentioning them..."

"**Yeh don' know… yeh don' know…" Hagrid ran his fingers through his hair, fixing Harry with a bewildered stare.**

"**Yeh don' know what yeh**_**are**_**?" he said finally.** **Uncle Vernon –"**

"I'm surprised he didn't come out with 'Of course I know who I am! I'm Harry!'" Dominique smiled. James and a few others, Albus included, laughed, but Lily pursed her lips, not liking her father being teased.

"**Uncle Vernon suddenly found his voice."**

"**Stop!" he commanded. "Stop right there, sir! I forbid you to tell the boy anything!""**

Victoire snorted. "As if Hagrid will listen to that."

" **A braver man than Vernon Dursley would have quailed under the furious look Hagrid now gave him; when Hagrid spoke, his every syllable trembled with rage.**

"**You never told him? Never told him what was in the letter Dumbledore left fer him? I was there! I saw Dumbledore leave it, Dursley! An' you've kept it from him all these years?"**

"**Kept**_**what**_**from me?" said Harry eagerly."**

"Oh, you know, just your whole life," Freddie sniggered.

""**STOP! I FORBID YOU!" yelled Uncle Vernon in panic.** **Aunt Petunia gave a gasp of horror.**

"**Ah, go boil yer heads, both of yeh,-""**

"I'm all for that," Louis nodded. James snorted, "Yeah, me too."

"**- said Hagrid. "Harry — yer a wizard.""**

"Boom!" James punched the air. "And that's when Dad gets cool!"

"He's always sounded a lot cooler than his family," Dominique pointed out.

"Yeah, but no where near as cool as when with a wand and all the magic and stuff!" James protested, sounding whiney.

" **There was silence inside the hut. Only the sea and the whistling wind could be heard.**

"**I'm a**_**what**_**?" gasped Harry.** "

"Wizard, mate. That's what he said," James said.

"**A wizard, o' course," said Hagrid, sitting back down on the sofa, which groaned and sank even lower, "an' a thumpin' good 'un, I'd say, once yeh've been trained up a bit. With a mum an' dad like yours, what else would yeh be? An' I reckon it's abou' time yeh read yer letter.""**

"And about time!" Roxanne cried out. Hugo nodded.

" **Harry stretched out his hand at last to take the yellowish envelope, addressed in emerald green to**

_**Mr H. Potter, The Floor, Hut-on-the-Rock, The Sea."**_

"It's crudely precise, that letter," Molly said with a distasteful expression.

"**He pulled out the letter and read:**

_**HOGWARTS SCHOOL of WITCHCRAFT and WIZARDRY**_

_**Headmaster: ALBUS DUMBLEDORE**_

_**(Order of Merlin, First Class, Grand Sorc., Chf. Warlock, Supreme Mugwump, International Confed. of Wizards)**_

_**Dear Mr Potter,**_

_**We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment.**_

_**Term begins on September 1. We await your owl by no later than July 31.**_

_**Yours sincerely,**_

_**Minerva McGonagall,-"**_

James and Louis cheered.

"_**Deputy Headmistress.**_

**Questions exploded inside Harry's head like fireworks-"**

"Not like Wheezes' fireworks," Freddie muttered, "bet he doesn't get flying dragons and ones which land as snow."

"Of course he doesn't, Freddie, he's not weird," Lily smirked.

"He's got to be! He's your father!" Freddie retorted. Lily only rolled her eyes.

"**-and he couldn't decide which to ask first. After a few minutes he stammered, "What does it mean, they await my owl?""**

"Yeah," James snorted, "don't ask how you got accepted when you never applied, don't ask what it means by Witchcraft and Wizardry..."

"**Gallopin' Gorgons, that reminds me," said Hagrid, clapping a hand to his forehead with enough force to knock over a cart horse, and from yet another pocket inside his overcoat he pulled an owl — a real, live, rather ruffled-looking owl-"**

"Probably bit annoyed too, doesn't sound like much space in that coat," said Freddie.

"Ew!" Hugo cried out. "Imagine what it's done in that pocket!"

Molly scoffed at the immaturity of this comment, and how Freddie, Roxanne, Hugo, Lily, even Albus, were all giggling and looking disgusted.

"— **a long quill, and a roll of parchment. With his tongue between his teeth he scribbled a note that Harry could read upside down:"**

"Can't even read it the right way up," muttered James.

Louis rolled his eyes. "It's bloody impossible to read with you guys interrupting me all the time."

"James, it's the Weasley blood. The thoughts in each of your heads get lonely, so you talk and let them loose to have friends," Teddy was choking on his own wit by the end of this sentence. Victoire slapped the top of his head.

"_**Dear Professor Dumbledore,**_

_**Given Harry his letter.**_

_**Taking him to buy his things tomorrow.**_

_**Weather's horrible. Hope you're well.**_

_**Hagrid"**_

"Bit blunt," Scorpius raised an eyebrow.

"**Hagrid rolled up the note, gave it to the owl, which clamped it in its beak, went to the door, and threw the owl out into the storm."**

"Poor thing!" Lucy cried.

Molly rolled her eyes. "Lucy, owls are resilient. There's a good reason wizards and witches have used them for as long as we know."

"But still!"

" **Then he came back and sat down as though this was as normal as talking on the telephone.** **Harry realised his mouth was open and closed it quickly.**

"**Where was I?" said Hagrid, but at that moment, Uncle Vernon, still ashen-faced but looking very angry, moved into the firelight.**

"**He's not going," he said."**

"Hah!" Dominique laughed. "As if Uncle Harry wouldn't go to Hogwarts."

" **Hagrid grunted.**

"**I'd like ter see a great Muggle like you stop him," he said.**

"**A what?" said Harry, interested.**

"**A Muggle," said Hagrid, "it's what we call non-magic folk like them. An' it's your bad luck you grew up in a family o' the biggest Muggles I ever laid eyes on.""**

"Hagrid!" Molly said, astounded. "He implied that being a Muggle was bad!"

Lily too frowned, Lucy mirroring her.

"I'm sure he didn't mean it like that," Albus said fairly.

"How else could he mean it?" Louis asked.

Albus couldn't answer.

""**We swore when we took him in we'd put a stop to that rubbish," said Uncle Vernon, "swore we'd stamp it out of him! Wizard indeed!"**

"**You**_**knew**_**?" said Harry. "You**_**knew**_**I'm a — a wizard?"**

"**Knew!" shrieked Aunt Petunia suddenly. "**_**Knew**_**! Of course we knew! How could you not be, my dratted sister being what she was?"**

Lily, Albus, James and Teddy all scowled, having great respect and love for Lily Evans, having seen her grinning face around Harry's house for all their lives. There was even a picture of her and James in this very room; her looking very resplendent on her wedding day.

"**Oh, she got a letter just like that and disappeared off to that — that**_**school-"**_

"The greatest school there is," James said sullenly.

" — **and came home every holiday with her pockets full of frog spawn, turning teacups into rats.** **But for my mother and father, oh no, it was Lily this and Lily that, they were proud of having a witch in the family!""**

"Hmm," Rose frowned. "I guess it could be quite hard to have a magical sibling. The attention would go to them when they were home, and I don't suppose you'd get to see them much."

"Doesn't mean Petunia has a reason to hate my grandmother!" Lily replied hotly.

"I know," Rose assured her, "it was just, well, I can slightly understand. Not to that extent, of course!" she hastily added, seeing Lily stiffen, ready to shout.

" **She stopped to draw a deep breath and then went ranting on. It seemed she had been wanting to say all this for years.**

"**Then she met that Potter at school and they left and got married and had you, and of course I knew you'd be just the same, just as strange, just as — as —**_**abnormal-"**_

"_Abnormal?"_ Victoire hissed, pursing her lips.

" — **and then, if you please, she went and got herself blown up and we got landed with you!"** **Harry had gone very white."**

"Ouch," Lucy said sympathetically. "Be awful to find out that way..."

Albus winced. "That would be horrible," he agreed. Scorpius too nodded.

"**As soon as he found his voice he said, "Blown up? You told me they died in a car crash!"**

"**CAR CRASH!" roared Hagrid, jumping up so angrily that the Dursleys scuttled back to their corner. "How could a car crash kill Lily an' James Potter? It's an outrage! A scandal! Harry Potter not knowin' his own story when every kid in our world knows his name!"**

"**But why? What happened?" Harry asked urgently.** **The anger faded from Hagrid's face. He looked suddenly anxious."**

"Ooooh," Rose breathed in, "Ooh, I would really not like to have to tell him that!"

""**I never expected this," he said, in a low, worried voice. "I had no idea, when Dumbledore told me there might be trouble gettin' hold of yeh, how much yeh didn't know. Ah, Harry, I don' know if I'm the right person ter tell yeh — but someone's gotta — yeh can't go off ter Hogwarts not knowin'."** **He threw a dirty look at the Dursleys.**

"**Well, it's best yeh know as much as I can tell yeh — mind, I can't tell yeh everythin', it's a great myst'ry, parts of it…""**

"Not for much longer," Roxanne grinned.

"**He sat down, stared into the fire for a few seconds, and then said, "It begins, I suppose, with — with a person called — but it's incredible yeh don't know his name, everyone in our world knows —"**

"**Who?"**

"**Well — I don' like sayin' the name if I can help it. No one does.""**

"Always seemed ridiculous to me," Freddie shook his head.

Teddy snorted, "Of course you don't. You weren't brought up in a time of fear. Voldemort was dead before your time, it's different."

"**Why not?"**

"**Gulpin' gargoyles, Harry, people are still scared."**

"But hasn't he been gone for ten years?" Hugo asked.

"He was still terrifying! They didn't know whether or not he'd come back, the guy killed hundreds of people and caused massive fear!" Teddy looked like he was squeezing something invisible. Perhaps they were just too young to get it. He presumed this book would help them know.

""**Blimey, this is difficult. See, there was this wizard who went… bad. As bad as you could go. Worse. Worse than worse. His name was…"**

**Hagrid gulped, but no words came out."**

"But Hagrid's so brave!" Lily cried out.

"Yes," Teddy said with the air of one trying to be very patient, "this is how terrifying Voldemort was, even ten years after him vanishing!"

""**Could you write it down?" Harry suggested.**

"**Nah — can't spell it. All right —**_**Voldemort**_**. "** **Hagrid shuddered. "Don' make me say it again. Anyway, this — this wizard, about twenty years ago now, started lookin' fer followers. Got 'em, too — some were afraid, some just wanted a bit o' his power, 'cause he was gettin' himself power, all right."**

Scorpius realised Hagrid was talking about people like his grandfather. He wasn't really sure what to make of that.

"**Dark days, Harry. Didn't know who ter trust, didn't dare get friendly with strange wizards or witches… terrible things happened. He was takin' over."**

Louis paused, trying to take in how the world was back then. Teddy noticed the downcast faces, all struggling to imagine a world in fear, and similarly realised he couldn't truly. For all his talk, Teddy didn't actually have much of a clue what it was like in that time.

"**'Course, some stood up to him — an' he killed 'em."**

Louis' voice had grown slightly harder saying this, and the atmosphere in the room had darkened significantly.

"**Horribly. One o' the only safe places left was Hogwarts. Reckon Dumbledore's the only one You-Know-Who was afraid of. Didn't dare try takin' the school, not jus' then, anyway.**

"**Now, yer mum an' dad were as good a witch an' wizard as I ever knew."**

James, Albus and Lily all looked slightly proud at being related to them.

"**Head boy an' girl at Hogwarts in their day! Suppose the myst'ry is why You-Know-Who never tried to get 'em on his side before… probably knew they were too close ter Dumbledore ter want anythin' ter do with the Dark Side.**

"**Maybe he thought he could persuade 'em… maybe he just wanted 'em outta the way. All anyone knows is, he turned up in the village where you was all living, on Halloween ten years ago."**

"Halloween?" Lily breathed in. "What an awful day to die on."

"Bit like a bad joke," James frowned. "Means the evil Voldemort was defeated on the 'scariest' day of the year."

" **You was just a year old. He came ter yer house an' — an' —"** **Hagrid suddenly pulled out a very dirty, spotted handkerchief and blew his nose with a sound like a foghorn.**

"**Sorry," he said. "But it's that sad — knew yer mum an' dad, an' nicer people yeh couldn't find — anyway…"**

Lily and James smiled sadly, wishing they'd known their grandparents. Albus was staring into the distance, deep in thought.

""**You-Know-Who killed 'em. An' then — an' this is the real myst'ry of the thing — he tried to kill you, too. Wanted ter make a clean job of it, I suppose, or maybe he just liked killin' by then."**

The three Potters winced at that.

"**But he couldn't do it. Never wondered how you got that mark on yer forehead? That was no ordinary cut. That's what yeh get when a powerful, evil curse touches yeh — took care of yer mum an' dad an' yer house, even — but it didn't work on you, an' that's why yer famous, Harry.**

"**No one ever lived after he decided ter kill 'em, no one except you, an' he'd killed some o' the best witches an' wizards of the age — the McKinnons, the Bones, the Prewetts-"**

"Not-" Molly began, but was interrupted by Victoire.

"Yes, Grandma was Prewett before she married Granddad. I think her two brothers were killed."

"Oh yeah," Roxanne said, "Dad said he and Fred were named after them. They were – Gideon and Fabian, right?" She directed the last at Freddie, who shrugged.

" — **an' you was only a baby, an' you lived."**

**Something very painful was going on in Harry's mind. As Hagrid's story came to a close, he saw again the blinding flash of green light, more clearly than he had ever remembered it before — and he remembered something else, for the first time in his life: a high, cold, cruel laugh."**

Lucy and Lily shuddered; Molly and James looked pained; Albus, Rose and Roxanne all winced.

"**Hagrid was watching him sadly.**

"**Took yeh from the ruined house myself, on Dumbledore's orders. Brought yeh ter this lot…."**

"**Load of old tosh," said Uncle Vernon."**

"What? He's the one speaking a load of tosh, not Hagrid!" Lily fumed.

" **Harry jumped; he had almost forgotten that the Dursleys were there. Uncle Vernon certainly seemed to have got back his courage. He was glaring at Hagrid and his fists were clenched."**

Albus snorted. "I'd love to see that fight. Would last one punch, maybe."

""**Now, you listen here, boy," he snarled, "I accept there's something strange about you, probably nothing a good beating wouldn't have cured-"**

"No!" Lily cried, "Shut up and leave him alone, you bastard!"

James was slightly in awe of his little sister's anger, and so patted her shoulder to calm her down. Not that the idea of someone wanting to beat his father didn't anger him, but he decided Lily was more in need of calming down a little.

Albus didn't say a word, but his eyes were hard and jaw set.

"**-****and as for all this about your parents, well, they were weirdoes, no denying it, and the world's better off without them in my opinion-" **Louis looked pained to be saying this. James and Lily Potter (the first) were very highly respected about the Potter-Weasley (-Lupin).

"Bollocks to that!" James shouted out angrily, removing his hand from his sister's shoulder.

"Wanker," Louis muttered angrily.

"**-asked for all they got, getting mixed up with these wizarding types — just what I expected, always knew they'd come to a sticky end -"** **But at that moment, Hagrid leapt from the sofa and drew a battered pink umbrella from inside his coat."**

"A pink umbrella?" Freddie shook his head in amazement. "He could get a bit more fearsome. I mean, even a walking stick is scarier than that!"

**Pointing this at Uncle Vernon like a sword, he said, "I'm warning you, Dursley — I'm warning you — one more word…"** **In danger of being speared on the end of an umbrella by a bearded giant,-"**

"Blimey," Hugo chuckled, "that does sound terrifying."

"All right, all right, I might have spoken too soon," Freddie conceded, also chuckling.

"**Uncle Vernon's courage failed again; he flattened himself against the wall and fell silent.**

"**That's better," said Hagrid, breathing heavily and sitting back down on the sofa, which this time sagged right down to the floor.** **Harry, meanwhile, still had questions to ask, hundreds of them."**

"Of course he does, even we do, and we know some of the story," Dominique said.

"Not like we know much, though," James said, frowning.

Teddy smirked. He knew a lot more than all of them.

Victoire was closest, so she slapped the back of his head to remove his smirk.

""**But what happened to Vol-, sorry — I mean, You-Know-Who?"**

"**Good question, Harry. Disappeared. Vanished. Same night he tried ter kill you. Makes yeh even more famous. That's the biggest myst'ry, see… he was gettin' more an' more powerful — why'd he go?"**

Rose wanted desperately to know this too. She'd grilled her mother and father – she and Hugo both had – but they'd told her she was too young to know the gory details. They'd always fobbed her off with mentions of love. James, Albus and Lily had the same issue.

""**Some say he died. Codswallop, in my opinion. Dunno if he had enough human left in him to die."**

Unease began to spread through the room. Teddy was the only one alive when Voldemort was still a threat, and he was slightly more preoccupied with grabbing his mother's pink hair and grabbing anything within grabbing distance, so this was a creepy way to first truly hear about the man Harry Potter had defeated.

" **Some say he's still out there, bidin' his time, like, but I don' believe it. People who was on his side came back ter ours. Some of 'em came outta kinda trances. Don' reckon they could've done if he was comin' back."**

"Yeah," Teddy said in an undertone, "can't imagine why. I'm sure he'd be fine that they renounce him when they think he's a bit weak."

""**Most of us reckon he's still out there somewhere but lost his powers."**

"Sounds a bit scary," Lucy said in a low voice. Albus snorted without humour. "Yeah, just a bit!"

" **Too weak to carry on. 'Cause somethin' about you finished him, Harry. There was somethin' goin' on that night he hadn't counted on —**_**I**_**dunno what it was, no one does**— **but somethin' about you stumped him, all right."** **Hagrid looked at Harry with warmth and respect blazing in his eyes,-"**

"Like everyone else who ever meets him," James muttered.

"-** but Harry, instead of feeling pleased and proud, felt quite sure there had been a horrible mistake."**

"Blimey, I'd feel that... just turned eleven and told you defeated the most evil wizard of all time when you were a baby... I'd think Hagrid was off his rocker," Hugo said, marvelling at the absurdity of the situation. Teddy chuckled appreciatively.

"**A wizard? Him? How could he possibly be? He'd spent his life being clouted by Dudley, and bullied by Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon;-"**

Here, they all frowned again, and James swore at the Dursleys.

"**- if he was really a wizard, why hadn't they been turned into warty toads every time they'd tried to lock him in his cupboard?"**

"Ahh, if he had that would have been awesome," said Roxanne with a wistful expression.

"**If he'd once defeated the greatest sorcerer in the world, how come Dudley had always been able to kick him around like a football?"**

"Football?"

"I'd imagine," Rose said in a voice full of sarcasm and distain, "it was some kind of _ball_ which you play with with your _feet."_

""**Hagrid," he said quietly, "I think you must have made a mistake. I don't think I can be a wizard."** **To his surprise, Hagrid chuckled.**

"**Not a wizard, eh? Never made things happen when you was scared or angry?""**

"Yup!" Albus nodded, flicking up one, two, three fingers, "There's the hair, the flying-"

"Al," Rose smiled, "we know. We've heard Uncle Harry think about them too." Albus' face tinged a slight red, and he stopped counting things off his fingers, and closed his mouth.

"**Harry looked into the fire. Now he came to think about it… every odd thing that had ever made his aunt and uncle furious with him had happened when he, Harry, had been upset or angry… chased by Dudley's gang, he had somehow found himself out of their reach… dreading going to school with that ridiculous haircut, he'd managed to make it grow back… and the very last time Dudley had hit him, hadn't he got his revenge, without even realizing he was doing it? Hadn't he set a boa constrictor on him?"**

"He thinks that like it's a good thing," Molly huffed. "That was dangerous."

Lily looked like she was about to retort angrily, but Louis, to their surprise, nodded. "That's true, but it wasn't like Uncle Harry meant to set it on Dudley. And the snake just gave him a shock, that's all."

"He still shouldn't present it like it's a good thing," Molly grumbled, but let it lie.

" **Harry looked back at Hagrid, smiling, and saw that Hagrid was positively beaming at him.**

"**See?" said Hagrid. "Harry Potter, not a wizard — you wait, you'll be right famous at Hogwarts."But Uncle Vernon wasn't going to give in without a fight.**

"**Haven't I told you he's not going?" he hissed. "He's going to Stonewall High and he'll be grateful for it."**

"He's not going to bloody Stonewall High!" James said hotly. "Stop trying to control Dad!"

"**I've read those letters and he needs all sorts of rubbish — spell books and wands and —"**

"**If he wants ter go, a great Muggle like you won't stop him," growled Hagrid. "Stop Lily an' James Potter's son goin' ter Hogwarts! Yer mad. His name's been down ever since he was born.** **He's off ter the finest school of witchcraft and wizardry in the world."**

"_Maman_ still thinks Beaubatons is better," said Louis, shaking his head.

"Your mum's wrong," James said.

"I'm sure they both have their merits," Rose pointed out.

"Still, Hogwarts is better," James said stubbornly. Rose raised her eyebrows but said no more.

"**Seven years there and he won't know himself. He'll be with youngsters of his own sort, fer a change, an' he'll be under the greatest headmaster Hogwarts ever had Albus Dumbled—"**

"**I AM NOT PAYING FOR SOME CRACKPOT OLD FOOL TO TEACH HIM MAGIC TRICKS!" yelled Uncle Vernon.** **But he had finally gone too far. Hagrid seized his umbrella and whirled it over his head,-"**

"Ooh, watch out," Freddie guffawed, "Ol' Hagrid'll rain down on you!"

**"NEVER —" he thundered, "— INSULT — ALBUS — DUMBLEDORE — IN — FRONT — OF — ME!"** **He brought the umbrella swishing down through the air to point at Dudley — there was a flash of violet light, a sound like a firecracker, a sharp squeal, and the next second, Dudley was dancing on the spot with his hands clasped over his fat bottom, howling in pain. When he turned his back on them, Harry saw a curly pig's tail poking through a hole in his trousers."**

They all exploded with laughter – well, most of them did. Molly laughed, but not very hard, more of a heavy chuckle, while Victoire let out a few airy laughs.

"Oh, Hagrid," Hugo hooted, admiring Hagrid more than he ever had.

"**Uncle Vernon roared. Pulling Aunt Petunia and Dudley into the other room, he cast one last terrified look at Hagrid and slammed the door behind them.** **Hagrid looked down at his umbrella and stroked his beard.**

"**Shouldn'ta lost me temper," he said ruefully, "but it didn't work anyway. Meant ter turn him into a pig, but I suppose he was so much like a pig anyway there wasn't much left ter do.""**

James laughed loudly again, and the preteens all grinned gleefully at each other. Louis unintentionally snorted, and couldn't stop, which got everyone laughing as he sounded just like a pig.

Only Victoire didn't, who looked mildly irritated at the immaturity of the room.

" **He cast a sideways look at Harry under his bushy eyebrows.**

"**Be grateful if yeh didn't mention that ter anyone at Hogwarts," he said. "I'm — er — not supposed ter do magic, strictly speakin'. I was allowed ter do a bit ter follow yeh an' get yer letters to yeh an' stuff — one o' the reasons I was so keen ter take on the job.""**

Rose rolled her eyes. "He's meant to say that he took the job so he got to see Harry again, not so he could use magic again."

"To be fair," said Louis, "you're also not supposed to get expelled back in your third year. Or drink on the job," he added as if an afterthought.

""**Why aren't you supposed to do magic?" asked Harry.**

"**Oh, well — I was at Hogwarts meself but I — er — got expelled, ter tell yeh the truth. In me third year. They snapped me wand in half an' everything. But Dumbledore let me stay on as gamekeeper. Great man, Dumbledore.""**

"He sounds it," Molly nodded. Albus felt pride again at being named after this man. He seemed brilliant.

"**Why were you expelled?"**

"**It's gettin' late and we've got lots ter do tomorrow," said Hagrid loudly."**

"Aww," James said, "I always fancied knowing why he got expelled."

" **"Gotta get up ter town, get all yer books an' that."**

**He took off his thick black coat and threw it to Harry."**

"Oh yeah, Hugo got wrapped up in that, didn't you, Hugh?" Freddie hit his shoulder.

Hugo glowered at him. "Only because _someone_ thought it'd be funny to rock the boat," he grumbled.

"Yeah," Freddie smirked, "Roxanne."

"It wasn't my idea!" Roxanne protested, her ears going slightly red.

"_You_ made me fall in?" Hugo turned his glower to Roxanne, who grinned sheepishly and gave an apologetic shrug.

""**You can kip under that," he said. "Don' mind if it wriggles a bit, I think I still got a couple o' dormice in one o' the pockets." **Blimey, that was a lot of words." Louis gasped.

Molly wrinkled her nose, clearly not liking the idea of sleeping under a coat that wriggles.

Louis stretched and handed the book to the nearest one to him – Lucy, who sighed, made a pleading look at her cousin, and got up and sat where he'd sat.


	5. 5: Diagon Alley Enter Harry & Ginny

**All right, I'm rubbish at updating when I say I will. I'll change my promise; update as often as possible. **

**Point out what's wrong, what you don't like, and hey, why not what you do like?**

* * *

><p>Lucy took a deep breath and began: "<strong>Chapter Five: Diagon Alley."<strong>

Here already there was a great deal of cheering, especially loud from Roxanne and Freddie, that Alley being their home.

Lucy grinned and continued, **"Harry woke early the next morning. Although he could tell it was daylight, he kept his eyes shut tight."**

"Daylight! That's not early," Lucy interrupted herself.

"In the summer it is," Rose reminded her, "this would be getting into August now, I presume."

"_**It was a dream,**_**he told himself firmly.**_**I dreamed a giant called Hagrid came to tell me I was going to a school for wizards. When I open my eyes I'll be at home in my cupboard."**_

Albus frowned at "my cupboard." It just didn't sound nice at all.

"**There was suddenly a loud tapping noise.**

_**And there's Aunt Petunia knocking on the door**_**, Harry thought, his heart sinking.**

**But he still didn't open his eyes. It had been such a good dream."**

James grinned. "You're very wrong there."

"Luckily," added Freddie.

"**Tap. Tap. Tap.**

"**All right," Harry mumbled, "I'm getting up.""**

"Surely he can tell by now? He's not got his aunt moaning at him," Lily pointed out.

"**He sat up and Hagrid's heavy coat fell off him."**

Despite everyone knowing it wasn't a dream, each of them smiled at that, smiling in relief.

" **The hut was full of sunlight, the storm was over, Hagrid himself was asleep on the collapsed sofa, and there was an owl rapping its claw on the window, a newspaper held in its beak.**

**Harry scrambled to his feet, so happy he felt as though a large balloon was swelling inside him. He went straight to the window and jerked it open."**

"See? He was made for this world. There's an owl tapping on the window holding a newspaper, and what does he do? Calmly gets up and lets it in," Lily said with pride.

"**The owl swooped in and dropped the newspaper on top of Hagrid, who didn't wake up. The owl then fluttered onto the floor and began to attack Hagrid's coat.**

"**Don't do that.""**

Victoire snorted (delicately and beautifully, of course). "As if the owl would listen to him."

"He would hardly know the temperament of owls," Molly tucked her hair behind her ear.

"**Harry tried to wave the owl out of the way, but it snapped its beak fiercely at him and carried on savaging the coat.**

"**Hagrid!" said Harry loudly. "There's an owl —""**

"Blimey," Louis blinked, "don't think I'd have the courage to wake Hagrid up after first meeting him."

""**Pay him," Hagrid grunted into the sofa.**

"**What?"**

"**He wants payin' fer deliverin' the paper. Look in the pockets."**

**Hagrid's coat seemed to be made of nothing**_**but**_**pockets — bunches of keys,** **slug pellets, balls of string, peppermint humbugs,-"**

"Humbugs are so good," Roxanne grinned.

"I agree with Dumbledore, actually, I think I prefer sherbet lemons," Rose said thoughtfully.

"Ah, I could do with some Bertie Botts..." Freddie looked wistful, imagining boxes upon boxes of the daring beans.

"**-teabags… -"**

"Tea! I could really have some tea right now," Louis blurted out.

James looked at him sideways. "And you call yourself French?" he scoffed.

"No." He replied.

"Oh."

Lucy snorted. "- **finally, Harry pulled out a handful of strange-looking coins.**

"**Give him five Knuts," said Hagrid sleepily."**

"Only five? For a newspaper?" Lily was amazed.

"The war encouraged inflation. Things are more expensive now, although people get paid more, so it slightly works out," Rose informed her.

""**Knuts?"**

"**The little bronze ones."**

**Harry counted out five little bronze coins, and the owl held out his leg so Harry could put the money into a small leather pouch tied to it. Then he flew off through the open window.**

**Hagrid yawned loudly, sat up, and stretched.**

"**Best be off, Harry, lots ter do today, gotta get up ter London an' buy all yer stuff fer school.""**

"Ooh," Roxanne gave a happy little wiggle, "Diagon Alley!"

"Ooh!" Freddie imitated her in a high pitched voice, and gave a bad imitation of her wiggling.

"Oh, shut up," she retorted angrily.

"**Harry was turning over the wizard coins and looking at them. He had just thought of something that made him feel as though the happy balloon inside him had got a puncture."**

Freddie snorted. "Sounds like he's got to fart," he sniggered.

""**Um — Hagrid?"**

"**Mm?" said Hagrid, who was pulling on his huge boots.**

"**I haven't got any money — and you heard Uncle Vernon last night… he won't pay for me to go and learn magic.""**

"But Dad's rich!" Lily protested.

"Yes," said Molly, sounding like she was talking to a five year old, "but he doesn't know that yet, does he?"

Lily scowled at being talked down to. She loved Molly, but Molly could be very patronising, and downright dull at times. Not to mention pompous. Lily couldn't understand where this came from – Percy may be slightly dull, but he didn't speak down to anyone – well, maybe a little – but he certainly wasn't as pretentious as his daughter. And Audrey was rather lovely.

""**Don't worry about that," said Hagrid, standing up and scratching his head. "D'yeh think yer parents didn't leave yeh anything?"**

"**But if their house was destroyed —""**

"Why would anyone keep their money in their house?" James asked, astounded.

"I'm sure even Muggles don't do that," Rose was puzzled.

""**They didn' keep their gold in the house, boy!"**

"'Boy,'" Albus repeated with a raised eyebrow. "Not like Hagrid to call someone that."

"He wouldn't have meant it like the Dursley's meant it," Molly replied. James grinned at how the argument had reversed to it being Molly to defend Hagrid.

"No, I know," Albus said hastily, "just that it's quite patronising, that's all."

"**Nah, first stop fer us is Gringotts. Wizards' bank. Have a sausage, they're not bad cold — an' I wouldn' say no teh a bit o' yer birthday cake, neither."**

"**Wizards have**_**banks**_**?""**

"No, we keep our money under stones," Dominique commented sarcastically.

""**Just the one. Gringotts. Run by goblins."**

**Harry dropped the bit of sausage he was holding.**

"_**Goblins**_**?""**

"I dislike goblins," Victoire shuddered. That time that the group of them had appeared at Shell Cottage was a day she'd never forget. The rude, ungrateful, messy and tricky things had leered at her while ordering her to make tea and other things while they waited for Bill Weasley to return home.

""**Yeah — so yeh'd be mad ter try an' rob it, I'll tell yeh that. Never mess with goblins, Harry.** **Gringotts is the safest place in the world fer anything yeh want ter keep safe — 'cept maybe Hogwarts. As a matter o' fact, I gotta visit Gringotts anyway. Fer Dumbledore. Hogwarts business.""**

"Sounds intriguing," said Lucy. "D'you think we might find out?"

"Yes," said Dominique, James, Lily, Hugo and Teddy. The others laughed.

"**Hagrid drew himself up proudly. "He usually gets me ter do important stuff fer him. Fetchin' you — gettin' things from Gringotts — knows he can trust me, see.""**

"Yup, ", grinned James, "trust him with his life, he would."

"We _know_, James." Rose said.

""**Got everythin'? Come on, then." Harry followed Hagrid out onto the rock. The sky was quite clear now and the sea gleamed in the sunlight. The boat Uncle Vernon had hired was still there, with a lot of water in the bottom after the storm.**

"**How did you get here?" Harry asked, looking around for another boat.**

"**Flew," said Hagrid.**

"_**Flew**_**?""**

Freddie laughed. "Imagine seeing a massive great man just flying over the sea... that'd be mental."

""**Yeah — but we'll go back in this. Not s'pposed ter use magic now I've got yeh."**

**They settled down in the boat, Harry still staring at Hagrid, trying to imagine him flying."**

Grins and chuckles were emitted, the occupants were all trying to imagine the same thing.

""**Seems a shame ter row, though," said Hagrid, giving Harry another of his sideways looks. "If I was ter — er — speed things up a bit, would yeh mind not mentionin' it at Hogwarts?"**

"**Of course not," said Harry, eager to see more magic. Hagrid pulled out the pink umbrella again, tapped it twice on the side of the boat, and they sped off toward land.**

"**Why would you be mad to try and rob Gringotts?" Harry asked.**

"**Spells — enchantments," said Hagrid, unfolding his newspaper as he spoke. "They say there's dragons guardin' the high security vaults."**

"D'you really think there is a dragon?" Freddie asked excitedly.

"I think there might be," Victoire said thoughtfully, "I've heard Uncle Charlie arguing with Dad about a dragon being kept by a bank."

"That's horrible! Dragons need fresh air and space to move, you wouldn't get that in Gringotts!" Lucy protested.

"**And then yeh gotta find yer way — Gringotts is hundreds of miles under London, see. Deep under the Underground. Yeh'd die of hunger tryin' ter get out, even if yeh did manage ter get yer hands on summat."**

**Harry sat and thought about this while Hagrid read his newspaper, the**_**Daily Prophet**_**."**

"Thought that was a load of bollocks when Dad was young," James said.

"I think it was all right until Voldemort returned," Teddy replied. Harry had said something about the _Prophet_, it was true, and there was a reason why their family preferred _The Quibbler_, even if it was filled with nonsense from their friend Luna Scamander.

" **Harry had learned from Uncle Vernon that people liked to be left alone while they did this, but it was very difficult, he'd never had so many questions in his life.**

"**Ministry o' Magic messin' things up as usual," Hagrid muttered, turning the page."**

"Oh, there we go," Teddy laughed.

""**There's a Ministry of Magic?" Harry asked, before he could stop himself.**

"'**Course," said Hagrid. "They wanted Dumbledore fer Minister, o' course, but he'd never leave Hogwarts, so old Cornelius Fudge got the job."**

"Dad always calls him a tool," Albus said knowledgably.

Teddy snorted, having broached this subject with Harry too. "Yes, he really was."

"**Bungler if ever there was one. So he pelts Dumbledore with owls every morning, askin' fer advice.""**

James snorted. "Sounds rubbish already."

""**But what does a Ministry of Magic**_**do**_**?"**

"**Well, their main job is to keep it from the Muggles that there's still witches an' wizards up an' down the country."**

"**Why?""**

"If Muggles knew there really was magic, they'd be wanting to use it for everything. That could go so far as to starting a civil war!" Rose informed Lucy, as if it were she asking the question.

"What's a civil war?" Hugo enquired, cocking his head.

"A war when the two sides are from the same country – like, two armies from the same country, one in favour of one ruler and the other in favour of the other, fighting against each other."

"Oh."

""_**Why?**_**Blimey, Harry, everyone'd be wantin' magic solutions to their problems. Nah, we're best left alone."**

**At this moment the boat bumped gently into the harbour wall. Hagrid folded up his newspaper, and they clambered up the stone steps onto the street.**

**Passersby stared a lot at Hagrid as they walked through the little town to the station."**

"Yeah, a half-giant definitely fits in with the sleepy British residents of a small town," Louis shook his head at Hagrid's complete lack of subtlety.

"**Harry couldn't blame them. Not only was Hagrid twice as tall as anyone else, he kept pointing at perfectly ordinary things like parking meters and saying loudly, "See that, Harry? Things these Muggles dream up, eh?"**

"**Hagrid," said Harry, panting a bit as he ran to keep up, "did you say there are**_**dragons**_**at Gringotts?"**

"**Well, so they say," said Hagrid. "Crikey, I'd like a dragon."**

"**You'd**_**like**_**one?""**

"I'd want a dragon!" Lucy interrupted herself, "baby ones are so cute!"

"Yes," Molly scoffed, "until it got big enough to think you'd make a nice snack."

"Uncle Charlie would help me look after it," Lucy said mulishly. Molly only shook her head in reply.

"**Wanted one ever since I was a kid — here we go."**

**They had reached the station. There was a train to London in five minutes' time. Hagrid, who didn't understand "Muggle money," as he called it, gave the bills to Harry so he could buy their tickets.**

**People stared more than ever on the train. Hagrid took up two seats and sat knitting what looked like a canary-yellow circus tent." **Lucy was giggling as she read this, imagining this.

"**Still got yer letter, Harry?" he asked as he counted stitches."**

"I can't believe Hagrid knits," Hugo looked amazed.

"Really? I can," Louis looked less than amazed. The potential if you looked like Hagrid...

**Harry took the parchment envelope out of his pocket.**

"**Good," said Hagrid. "There's a list there of everything yeh need."**

**Harry unfolded a second piece of paper he hadn't noticed the night before, and read:**

_**HOGWARTS SCHOOL of WITCHCRAFT and WIZARDRY**_

_**UNIFORM**_

_**First-year students will require:**_

_**1. Three sets of plain work robes (black)**_

_**2. One plain pointed hat (black) for day wear**_

_**3. One pair of protective gloves (dragon hide or similar)**_

_**4. One winter cloak (black, silver fastenings)**_

_**Please note that all pupils' clothes should carry name tags**_

_**COURSE BOOKS**_

_**All students should have a copy of each of the following:**_

_**The Standard Book of Spells (Grade 1)by Miranda Goshawk**_

_**A History of Magic by Bathilda Bagshot**_

_**Magical Theory by Adalbert Waffling-"**_

"Got that right," James muttered.

"_**-A Beginners' Guide to Transfiguration by Emeric Switch-"**_

"Hah, 'Switch'", Roxanne tittered.

_**One Thousand Magical Herbs and Fungi by Phyllida Spore**_

_**Magical Drafts and Potions by Arsenius Jigger**_

_**Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them by Newt Scamander-"**_

"That's –"

"Yes, Freddie, Lorcan and Lysander's granddad, we know," Freddie pulled a face at Roxanne.

"_**The Dark Forces: A Guide to Self-Protection by Quentin Trimble**_

_**OTHER EQUIPMENT**_

_**1 wand**_

_**1 cauldron (pewter, standard size 2)**_

_**1 set of glass or crystal phials**_

_**1 telescope set**_

_**1 brass scales**_

_**Students may also bring an owl OR a cat OR a toad-"**_

"Who'd bring a toad?"

"_**-PARENTS ARE REMINDED THAT FIRST YEARS ARE NOT ALLOWED THEIR OWN BROOMSTICKS**_

"**Can we buy all this in London?" Harry wondered aloud."**

"'Course you can!" Freddie said excitedly.

""**If yeh know where to go," said Hagrid.**

The room door opened, and Lucy dropped the book in shock. They watched helplessly as a good looking, red headed woman peered around the door, eyebrow raised.

"What are you all doing?" Ginny Potter sounded utterly bewildered – in fact, she was utterly bewildered.

"What- is Lucy reading to you all?" Lucy mutely picked the book up and stared at her aunt with wide eyes.

Teddy had jumped up when he saw Ginny – his girlfriend almost straddling him wasn't something he wanted the closest thing to a mother to see him do.

"Ginny!" he said guiltily. James sighed. His god-brother was a god-awful liar.

"Evening, Mum!" James said, in what he clearly thought was a jaunty, winning voice.

Ginny snorted. "Your uncles used that voice on my mum. Worked on her about as well as it's going to work on me."

"We're not doing anything wrong," Roxanne protested.

Ginny snorted again, actually coming into the room. "She heard that a lot too."

"What's going on?" Harry's scruffy bespectacled head popped around the door.

"They're _reading_," Ginny said.

Harry snorted "Go on, what are you reading?" Lucy looked at James, James looked around to Teddy, and somehow the gaze landed on Freddie and Roxanne – possibly because they were the ones with the idea in the first place?

"Well?" Ginny asked. Wordlessly, Lucy handed the book over to her aunt.

"_Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone..."_ Ginny lookedat Harry, who was staring at the book.

"No," he said quietly. He took it off her, read the blurb and flicked through the first pages.

"Where did you get this?"

Roxanne answered him in a meek voice. "Freddie and I found them in a Muggle bookshop."

"Them?"

Roxanne collected the books together and gave them to her uncle. He looked at them silently.

"Well. I... well." Harry was a little lost for words. This wasn't some crappy biography by Rita Skeeter or Francine Nosie . This was real.

"Where are you? Or should I say, where am I?" Harry said, slightly puzzled.

"Just about to go to Diagon Alley," Rose whispered. Harry nodded. He looked around at all the terrified faces, seemed to think things over, and reached a conclusion.

"Oh, why not then?" He made to sit down on the floor but Scorpius and Albus both jumped up to allow Harry and Ginny room on the sofa, but before Harry could sit, a small child latched around his waist. Lily hugged her father firmly, and from this Harry could guess the gist of the description of his life with the Dursleys – i.e. accurate.

Ginny looked very interested in this, and gave Lucy back the book and gestured for her to start reading. Lily settled by her father's feet.

"**Harry had never been to London before." **Lucy's voice cracked; she was a lot more nervous now Harry was in the room, and kept wanting to say "Uncle Harry had never"...** "Although Hagrid seemed to know where he was going, he was obviously not used to getting there in an ordinary way. He got stuck in the ticket barrier on the Underground, and complained loudly that the seats were too small and the trains too slow."**

Harry smiled. "He almost got stuck in the tube, and then hit his head a few times."

""**I don't know how the Muggles manage without magic," he said as they climbed a broken-down escalator that led up to a bustling road lined with shops.**

**Hagrid was so huge that he parted the crowd easily; all Harry had to do was keep close behind him. They passed book shops and music stores, hamburger bars and cinemas, but nowhere that looked as if it could sell you a magic wand."**

James laughed. "Dad, didn't you listen to Hagrid? They'd keep it hidden, of course."

"Oi, I was young and naive," Harry retorted mildly.

" **This was just an ordinary street full of ordinary people. Could there really be piles of wizard gold buried miles beneath them? Were there really shops that sold spell books and broomsticks? Might this not all be some huge joke that the Dursleys had cooked up?"**

"Nah," Freddie said ruefully, "they wouldn't have the brains."

"Or the imagination," Roxanne added.

"**If Harry hadn't known that the Dursleys had no sense of humour, he might have thought so; yet somehow, even though everything Hagrid had told him so far was unbelievable, Harry couldn't help trusting him."**

"Of course you'll trust Hagrid! Who wouldn't?" Louis protested. Harry agreed with him, totally.

""**This is it," said Hagrid, coming to a halt, "the Leaky Cauldron. It's a famous place."**

**It was a tiny, grubby-looking pub. If Hagrid hadn't pointed it out, Harry wouldn't have noticed it was there. The people hurrying by didn't glance at it. Their eyes slid from the big book shop on one side to the record shop on the other as if they couldn't see the Leaky Cauldron at all. In fact, Harry had the most peculiar feeling that only he and Hagrid could see it."**

"You know what? I reckon James and Harry are very similar. Both very simple," Teddy teased. Both Harry and James bristled at this, albeit light-heartedly.

"It was my first day in the wizarding world!" Harry protested, and James, in the same voice, said "I've always noticed that! It was Freddie who never noticed it!"

"Hey! I did!"

"No you didn't. I pointed it out to you."

"Shut up, Rox."

"**Before he could mention this, Hagrid had steered him inside.**

**For a famous place, it was very dark and shabby."**

"What? But now it's lovely," Freddie looked deeply upset at this.

"Yes, Neville and Hannah made it very homely when they took over it," Ginny smiled.

"**A few old women were sitting in a corner, drinking tiny glasses of sherry. One of them was smoking a long pipe. A little man in a top hat was talking to the old bartender, who was quite bald and looked like a toothless walnut."**

"Toothless walnut? Do you mean Tom?" Ginny sounded very amused.

"Yeah, I guess that was Tom," Harry chuckled.

" **The low buzz of chatter stopped when they walked in. Everyone seemed to know Hagrid; they waved and smiled at him, and the bartender reached for a glass, saying, "The usual, Hagrid?"**

"**Can't, Tom, I'm on Hogwarts business," said Hagrid, clapping his great hand on Harry's shoulder and making Harry's knees buckle."**

"He's done that to me too," Teddy sighed. Over half the people in the room nodded too.

""**Good Lord," said the bartender, peering at Harry, "is this — can this be —?"**

**The Leaky Cauldron had suddenly gone completely still and silent.**

"**Bless my soul," whispered the old bartender, "Harry Potter… what an honour.""**

"Merlin," Harry shook his head, "that was the weirdest moment of my life."

Ginny laughed outright, slightly bitterly, mind. "_That_ was the weirdest moment of your life?"

The colour rose in Harry's cheeks. "Well, all right, maybe not..."

"**He hurried out from behind the bar, rushed toward Harry and seized his hand, tears in his eyes.**

"**Welcome back, Mr Potter, welcome back."**

**Harry didn't know what to say. Everyone was looking at him. The old woman with the pipe was puffing on it without realizing it had gone out. Hagrid was beaming.**

**Then there was a great scraping of chairs and the next moment, Harry found himself shaking hands with everyone in the Leaky Cauldron."**

"I'll tell you now, that's one crazy experience."

""**Doris Crockford, Mr Potter, can't believe I'm meeting you at last."**

"**So proud, Mr Potter, I'm just so proud."**

"**Always wanted to shake your hand — I'm all of a flutter."**

"**Delighted, Mr Potter, just can't tell you, Diggle's the name, Dedalus Diggle.""**

"Mr Diggle! Oh, he's lovely!" Lily said excitedly.

""**I've seen you before!" said Harry, as Dedalus Diggle's top hat fell off in his excitement. "You bowed to me once in a shop.""**

"Oh, it was Diggle, not Flitwick then," Molly said unnecessarily.

""**He remembers!" cried Dedalus Diggle, looking around at everyone. "Did you hear that? He remembers me!" Harry shook hands again and again — Doris Crockford kept coming back for more.**

**A pale young man made his way forward, very nervously. One of his eyes was twitching."**

Harry stiffened at that.

""**Professor Quirrell!" said Hagrid. "Harry, Professor Quirrell will be one of your teachers at Hogwarts."**

"**P-P-Potter," stammered Professor Quirrell, grasping Harry's hand, "c-can't t-tell you how p-pleased I am to meet you."**

"**What sort of magic do you teach, Professor Quirrell?"**

"**D-Defence Against the D-D-Dark Arts," muttered Professor Quirrell, as though he'd rather not think about it."**

"You've got this guy as a Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher?" James looked rather unimpressed.

Harry laughed, but it had a very bitter quality to it.

"**N-not that you n-need it, eh, P-P-Potter?" He laughed** **nervously. "You'll be g-getting all your equipment, I suppose? I've g-got to p-pick up a new b-book on vampires, m-myself." He looked terrified at the very thought.**

**But the others wouldn't let Professor Quirrell keep Harry to himself. It took almost ten minutes to get away from them all. At last, Hagrid managed to make himself heard over the babble.**

"**Must get on — lots ter buy. Come on, Harry.""**

"I can't say I was unhappy when Hagrid said this," Harry muttered.

"**Doris Crockford shook Harry's hand one last time, and Hagrid led them through the bar and out into a small, walled courtyard, where there was nothing but a dustbin and a few weeds.**

**Hagrid grinned at Harry.**

"**Told yeh, didn't I? Told yeh you was famous. Even Professor Quirrell was tremblin' ter meet yeh — mind you, he's usually tremblin'."**

"**Is he always that nervous?"**

"**Oh, yeah. Poor bloke. Brilliant mind."**

Harry scoffed at this. Ginny knew there was something not right about Quirrell – her brothers had complained about him, and in a darker way than had he only been a bad teacher, but she didn't know the full story. And the rest of them in the room were just suspicious of Quirrell now.

"**He was fine while he was studyin' outta books but then he took a year off ter get some firsthand experience… They say he met vampires in the Black Forest, and there was a nasty bit o' trouble with a hag — never been the same since. Scared of the students, scared of his own subject –" **

"Sounds brilliant," Dominique muttered sarcastically.

"— **now, where's me umbrella?"**

**Vampires? Hags? Harry's head was swimming. Hagrid, meanwhile, was counting bricks in the wall above the dustbin.**

"**Three up… two across…" he muttered. "Right, stand back, Harry.""**

"You don't really have to stand back," Roxanne said knowledgably.

"We know," Lucy informed her.

"**He tapped the wall three times with the point of his umbrella.**

**The brick he had touched quivered — it wriggled — in the middle, a small hole appeared — it grew wider and wider — a second later they were facing an archway large enough even for Hagrid, an archway onto a cobbled street that twisted and turned out of sight.**

"**Welcome," said Hagrid, "to Diagon Alley." **Lucy stopped. "Would someone like to take over?"

"I'll do it!" Roxanne stood up energetically, and took the book and read with gusto, "**He grinned at Harry's amazement. They stepped through the archway. Harry looked quickly over his shoulder and saw the archway shrink instantly back into solid wall.**

**The sun shone brightly on a stack of cauldrons outside the nearest shop. Cauldrons — All Sizes — Copper, Brass, Pewter, Silver — Self-Stirring — Collapsible, said a sign hanging over them.**

"**Yeah, you'll be needin' one," said Hagrid, "but we gotta get yer money first."**

**Harry wished he had about eight more eyes."**

"I still wish that, to keep an eye on you all!" Harry joked.

"**He turned his head in every direction as they walked up the street, trying to look at everything at once: the shops, the things outside them, the people doing their shopping. A plump woman outside an Apothecary was shaking her head as they passed, saying, "Dragon liver, sixteen Sickles an ounce, they're mad…""**

"But that's so cheap!" Lucy's mouth hung open for a few moments, until Freddie sniggered that she'd catch flies soon.

"**A low, soft hooting came from a dark shop with a sign saying Eeylops Owl Emporium — Tawny, Screech, Barn, Brown, and Snowy. Several boys of about Harry's age had their noses pressed against a window with broomsticks in it. "Look," Harry heard one of them say, "the new Nimbus Two Thousand — fastest ever —"" **

"Nimbus Two Thousand? Nimbus Blade, now there's a broomstick!" James slapped the side of the sofa, presumably for emphasis.

"Nah," Dominique shook her head, "the Flash. That's the best."

"I'm the oldest one here and I know best! The Firebolt. Never was a broom more wonderful than the Firebolt," Harry said loudly. There was more protesting, but Roxanne had quite a shoddy broomstick – it was only shoddy because she couldn't aim very well, so her parents refused to get her another, so wanted out this conversation, and so read very loudly over the top. "**There were shops selling robes, shops selling telescopes and strange silver instruments Harry had never seen before, windows stacked with barrels of bat spleens and eels' eyes, tottering piles of spell books, quills, and rolls of parchment, potion bottles, globes of the moon…**

"**Gringotts," said Hagrid.**

**They had reached a snowy white building that towered over the other little shops. Standing beside its burnished bronze doors, wearing a uniform of scarlet and gold, was —**

"**Yeah, that's a goblin," said Hagrid quietly as they walked up the white stone steps toward him. The goblin was about a head shorter than Harry. He had a swarthy, clever face, a pointed beard and, Harry noticed, very long fingers and feet. He bowed as they walked inside. Now they were facing a second pair of doors, silver this time, with words engraved upon them:**

_**Enter, stranger, but take heed**_

_**Of what awaits the sin of greed,**_

_**For those who take, but do not earn,**_

_**Must pay most dearly in their turn.**_

_**So if you seek beneath our floors**_

_**A treasure that was never yours,**_

_**Thief, you have been warned, beware**_

_**Of finding more than treasure there.**_

"**Like I said, Yeh'd be mad ter try an' rob it," said Hagrid."**

Harry made a noise which sounded somewhere in between a cough and a laugh. Ginny giggled, "Sounds about right," she murmured to Harry, and both laughed some more.

Teddy, James and Albus eyed Harry and Ginny suspiciously, but Harry motioned for Roxanne to continue reading, and, knowing she'd get no answer, but might if she read on, she read on. "**A pair of goblins bowed them through the silver doors and they were in a vast marble hall. About a hundred more goblins were sitting on high stools behind a long counter, scribbling in large ledgers, weighing coins in brass scales, examining precious stones through eyeglasses. There were too many doors to count leading off the hall, and yet more goblins were showing people in and out of these. Hagrid and Harry made for the counter.**

"**Morning," said Hagrid to a free goblin. "We've come ter take some money outta Mr Harry Potter's safe."**

"**You have his key, sir?"**

"**Got it here somewhere," said Hagrid, and he started emptying his pockets onto the counter, scattering a handful of mouldy dog biscuits over the goblin's book of numbers."**

"Nice," Victoire wrinkled her nose.

"**The goblin wrinkled his nose." **Roxanne grinned as she read this, looking at Victoire, who went slightly pink, and wrinkled her nose further.

" **Harry watched the goblin on their right weighing a pile of rubies as big as glowing coals.**

"**Got it," said Hagrid at last, holding up a tiny golden key.**

**The goblin looked at it closely.**

"**That seems to be in order."**

"**An' I've also got a letter here from Professor Dumbledore," said Hagrid importantly, throwing out his chest. "It's about the You-Know-What in vault seven hundred and thirteen." **Ooh, what's the You-Know-What?" Roxanne asked Harry. He looked at her and simply shook his head.

"**The goblin read the letter carefully.**

"**Very well," he said, handing it back to Hagrid, "I will have someone take you down to both vaults. Griphook!"**

**Griphook was yet another goblin."**

"Of course it is," Rose muttered, "it's hardly a very human name, is it."

"**Once Hagrid had crammed all the dog biscuits back inside his pockets, he and Harry followed Griphook toward one of the doors leading off the hall.**

"**What's the You-Know-What in vault seven hundred and thirteen?" Harry asked."**

"Oh, yeah, what is it?" Freddie asked eagerly.

"If he didn't say to begin with, I doubt he'd go and tell Harry now," Ginny said.

""**Can't tell yeh that," said Hagrid mysteriously. "Very secret. Hogwarts business. Dumbledore's trusted me. More'n my job's worth ter tell yeh that.""**

Harry laughed once more.

"You know, Harry," Teddy said casually, "it's quite annoying when you do that. We've got no idea why you're laughing."

Harry only laughed more.

"**Griphook held the door open for them. Harry, who had expected more marble, was surprised. They were in a narrow stone passageway lit with flaming torches. It sloped steeply downward and there were little railway tracks on the floor. Griphook whistled and a small cart came hurtling up the tracks toward them. They climbed in — Hagrid with some difficulty-"**

"Can imagine," snorted Louis.

" — **and were off.**

**At first they just hurtled through a maze of twisting passages. Harry tried to remember, left, right, right, left, middle fork, right, left, but it was impossible.**

**The rattling cart seemed to know its own way, because Griphook wasn't steering."**

"It's magic, Uncle Harry." Hugo said, nodding.

"I know, Hugo..."

"**Harry's eyes stung as the cold air rushed past them, but he kept them wide open. Once, he thought he saw a burst of fire at the end of a passage and twisted around to see if it was a dragon, but too late-"**

"Aw, I want to know if there really is one!" Lucy cut in.

Harry met Ginny's eye and they both smiled.

"— **they plunged even deeper, passing an underground lake where huge stalactites and stalagmites grew from the ceiling and floor.**

"**I never know," Harry called to Hagrid over the noise of the cart, "what's the difference between a stalagmite and a stalactite?""**

Rose opened her mouth, but Freddie quickly clamped a hand over it. Rose wasn't impressed.

""**Stalagmite's got an 'm' in it," said Hagrid. "An' don' ask me questions just now, I think I'm gonna be sick."**

**He did look very green, and when the cart stopped at last beside a small door in the passage wall, Hagrid got out and had to lean against the wall to stop his knees from trembling."**

"Urgh," Lily made a face, "Hagrid sick. There's be masses."

James met Louis' eye. "I know what else Hagrid might make masses of," he grinned. Harry and Ginny gave him a withering look.

"**Griphook unlocked the door. A lot of green smoke came billowing out, and as it cleared, Harry gasped. Inside were mounds of gold coins. Columns of silver. Heaps of little bronze Knuts.**

"**All yours," smiled Hagrid.**

**All Harry's — it was incredible. The Dursleys couldn't have known about this or they'd have had it from him faster than blinking.**

**How often had they complained how much Harry cost them to keep?"**

Lily and Harry both snorted, thinking of Harry's hand-me-down clothes and little food, and pathetic excuse for a bedroom.

" **And all the time there had been a small fortune belonging to him, buried deep under London. Hagrid helped Harry pile some of it into a bag.**

"**The gold ones are Galleons," he explained. "Seventeen silver Sickles to a Galleon and twenty-nine Knuts to a Sickle, it's easy enough. Right, that should be enough fer a couple o' terms, we'll keep the rest safe for yeh." He turned to Griphook. "Vault seven hundred and thirteen now, please, and can we go more slowly?"**

"**One speed only," said Griphook.**

**They were going even deeper now and gathering speed. The air became colder and colder as they hurtled round tight corners. They went rattling over an underground ravine, and Harry leaned over the side to try to see what was down at the dark bottom, but Hagrid groaned and pulled him back by the scruff of his neck."**

Molly laughed. "Yes, wouldn't do too well for the Boy Who Lived if he dies going to the bank."

"**Vault seven hundred and thirteen had no keyhole.**

"**Stand back," said Griphook importantly. He stroked the door gently with one of his long fingers and it simply melted away.**

"**If anyone but a Gringotts goblin tried that, they'd be sucked through the door and trapped in there," said Griphook.**

"**How often do you check to see if anyone's inside?" Harry asked.**

"**About once every ten years," said Griphook with a rather nasty grin."**

"I wouldn't like to be the person to find them," Albus said, thinking of a ten year old corpse awaiting someone in a vault.

"**Something really extraordinary had to be inside this top security vault, Harry was sure, and he leaned forward eagerly, expecting to see fabulous jewels at the very least**— **but at first he thought it was empty. Then he noticed a grubby little package wrapped up in brown paper lying on the floor."**

"Well, that was an anti-climax," Louis remarked.

"**Hagrid picked it up and tucked it deep inside his coat. Harry longed to know what it was, but knew better than to ask."**

"Dad, did you find out?" Lily asked eagerly.

"Yes, I did."

Rose raised her eyebrows. Did they not notice the name of the book? She caught Teddy's eye and knew they were thinking the same.

""**Come on, back in this infernal cart, and don't talk to me on the way back, it's best if I keep me mouth shut," said Hagrid.**

**One wild cart ride later they stood blinking in the sunlight outside Gringotts. Harry didn't know where to run first now that he had a bag full of money. He didn't have to know how many Galleons there were to a pound to know that he was holding more money than he'd had in his whole life — more money than even Dudley had ever had."**

"Does Dudley change or something?" Albus asked. "Because you and him seem to get along now..."

"You'll probably find out," Harry replied. The Deathly Hallows book would probably contain the bit where everyone becomes him, so it must include the Dudley bit.

""**Might as well get yer uniform," said Hagrid, nodding toward Madam Malkin's Robes for All Occasions. "Listen, Harry, would yeh mind if I slipped off fer a pick-me-up in the Leaky Cauldron? I hate them Gringotts carts." He did still look a bit sick, so Harry entered Madam Malkin's shop alone, feeling nervous."**

"I think I was right to be nervous," Harry said. He knew what was coming.

"**Madam Malkin was a squat, smiling witch dressed all in mauve.**

"**Hogwarts, dear?" she said, when Harry started to speak. "Got the lot here — another young man being fitted up just now, in fact."**

**In the back of the shop, a boy with a pale, pointed face was standing on a footstool while a second witch pinned up his long black robes."**

"Oh, no..." Scorpius muttered.

Harry gave him a reassuring smile, trying to show that he still liked Scorpius even though his father was a bit of a prat.

" **Madam Malkin stood Harry on a stool next to him slipped a long robe over his head, and began to pin it to the right length.**

"**Hullo," said the boy, "Hogwarts, too?"**

"**Yes," said Harry.**

"**My father's next door buying my books and mother's up the street looking at wands," said the boy."**

"Shouldn't he really go with his mother to see the wands?" Rose enquired. "I thought they chose the wizard or something."

"That's Draco Malfoy for you," Ginny remarked. Everyone looked at Scorpius, who flushed slightly.

"The reason I'm always here is 'cause Dad and I don't really get along, you know that."

"**He had a bored, drawling voice. "Then I'm going to drag them off to look at racing brooms. I don't see why first years can't have their own. I think I'll bully father into getting me one and I'll smuggle it in somehow."**

**Harry was strongly reminded of Dudley."**

"I've met Dudley, and I definitely prefer him," Ginny said.

"You didn't meet the Dudley who didn't get along with me," Harry reminded her.

"Ron said he didn't seem too bad, when he met him."

"Ron saw him when he was terrified Mr Weasley would give him a tail!"

Ginny burst out laughing. "A what?"

"Oh, Mum, you should have been there! Hagrid gave Dudley a _tail!"_

"And, Gin, your brothers did give him an _interesting_ sweet."

"Oh. Of course. I remember that argument..."

"This something about Dad's stuff?" Freddie looked very interested.

"Later, Freddie. Perhaps... the fourth book?"

""**Have**_**you**_**got your own broom?" the boy went on.**

"**No," said Harry.**

"**Play Quidditch at all?"**

"**No," Harry said again, wondering what on earth Quidditch could be."**

"Not knowing Quidditch." James shook his head sadly. "That's a life not worth living."

Victoire scoffed at him.

""_**I**_**do — Father says it's a crime if I'm not picked to play for my house, and I must say, I agree. Know what house you'll be in yet?"**

"**No," said Harry, feeling more stupid by the minute."**

Ginny looked at her husband. "If he'd known who you were..."

"I don't want Draco Malfoy sucking up to me, thanks." Harry replied.

""**Well, no one really knows until they get there, do they, but I know I'll be in Slytherin, all our family have been — imagine being in Hufflepuff, I think I'd leave, wouldn't you?""**

"Hufflepuff is wonderful!" Lucy piped up.

""**Mmm," said Harry, wishing he could say something a bit more interesting.**

"**I say, look at that man!" said the boy suddenly, nodding toward the front window. Hagrid was standing there, grinning at Harry and pointing at two large ice creams to show he couldn't come in.**

"**That's Hagrid," said Harry, pleased to know something the boy didn't. "He works at Hogwarts."**

"**Oh," said the boy, "I've heard of him. He's a sort of servant, isn't he?"**

"**He's the gamekeeper," said Harry. He was liking the boy less and less every second."**

"Good." Ginny understood that Harry could be civil and neutral to Draco, but she could never like him.

""**Yes, exactly. I heard he's a sort of**_**savage**_— **lives in a hut on the school grounds and every now and then he gets drunk, tries to do magic, and ends up setting fire to his bed.""**

"Hagrid's brilliant!" James shouted. Cries of "Yeah!" and "Exactly!" circulated.

""**I think he's brilliant," said Harry coldly.**

"_**Do**_**you?" said the boy, with a slight sneer. "Why is he with you? Where are your parents?"**

"**They're dead," said Harry shortly. He didn't feel much like going into the matter with this boy."**

Freddie made to say something but Roxanne hit him. She didn't think her brother's insensitive jokes should be said at this time, when their young uncle was talking about his dead parents.

""**Oh, sorry," said the other, not sounding sorry at all.** "**But they were**_**our**_**kind, weren't they?"**

"**They were a witch and wizard, if that's what you mean."**

"**I really don't think they should let the other sort in, do you? They're just not the same, they've never been brought up to know our ways. Some of them have never even heard of Hogwarts until they get the letter, imagine. I think they should keep it in the old wizarding families."**

"That's completely ridiculous," Ginny seethed.

"Magic is in the person, not the blood," Lucy said.

Hugo and Rose both bore an angry expression, thinking of their brilliant mother. And well, to be fair, no one in the room looked best pleased that Draco Malfoy had said this.

"**What's your surname, anyway?"**

**But before Harry could answer, Madam Malkin said, "That's you done, my dear,""**

"Thank Merlin," Freddie muttered, at the same time as Harry said "Perfect timing."

"-** and Harry, not sorry for an excuse to stop talking to the boy, hopped down from the footstool.**

"**Well, I'll see you at Hogwarts, I suppose," said the drawling boy."**

"That made me very happy," Harry said sarcastically.

"**Harry was rather quiet as he ate the ice cream Hagrid had bought him (chocolate and raspberry with chopped nuts).**

"**What's up?" said Hagrid.**

"**Nothing," Harry lied."**

Ginny laughed. "You're a rubbish liar. Hagrid won't buy that."

"Probably not," Harry admitted, "but he knows how to drag it out of me."

"**They stopped to buy parchment and quills. Harry cheered up a bit when he found a bottle of ink that changed colour as you wrote."**

"Did that really cheer you up?" James looked unimpressed.

"Cheered me up," Albus grumbled.

"That's you. You're weird."

"James!"

"Sorry, Mum..."

The non-Potter's (and Lily)snickered.

"**When they had left the shop, he said, "Hagrid, what's Quidditch?"**

"**Blimey, Harry, I keep forgettin' how little yeh know — not knowin' about Quidditch!"**

"**Don't make me feel worse," said Harry. He told Hagrid about the pale boy in Madam Malkin's.**

"— **and he said people from Muggle families shouldn't even be allowed in —"**

"**Yer not**_**from**_**a Muggle family. If he'd known who yeh**_**were**_— **he's grown up knowin' yer name if his parents are wizardin' folk. You saw what everyone in the Leaky Cauldron was like when they saw yeh. Anyway, what does he know about it, some o' the best I ever saw were the only ones with magic in 'em in a long line o' Muggles — look at yer mum! Look what she had fer a sister!""**

"And look what some of us have as magical relatives," Dominique gestured at Louis.

"_V__a te faire foutre__!__"_

"**So what**_**is**_**Quidditch?"**

"**It's our sport. Wizard sport. It's like — like soccer in the Muggle world — everyone follows Quidditch — played up in the air on broomsticks and there's four balls — sorta hard ter explain the rules.""**

"It's easy!" James moaned.

""**And what are Slytherin and Hufflepuff?"**

"**School houses. There's four. Everyone says Hufflepuff are a lot o' duffers, but —""**

"No we're not," Lucy huffed.

""**I bet I'm in Hufflepuff," said Harry gloomily.**

"**Better Hufflepuff than Slytherin," said Hagrid darkly. "There's not a single witch or wizard who went bad who wasn't in Slytherin. You-Know-Who was one.""**

"I've got friends in Slytherin!" Albus interrupted.

"Things were different. House divisions were much stronger than they are now," Harry told them.

""**Vol-, sorry —You-Know-Who was at Hogwarts?"**

"**Years an' years ago," said Hagrid.**

**They bought Harry's school books in a shop called Flourish and Blotts where the shelves were stacked to the ceiling with books as large as paving stones bound in leather; books the size of postage stamps in covers of silk; books full of peculiar symbols and a few books with nothing in them at all."**

"I love that shop," Lily said.

"I'm ashamed to even be related to you," James shook his head.

"It's the smell of old books, they're so lovely," Rose shared a smile with Lily.

"**Even Dudley, who never read anything, would have been wild to get his hands on some of these. Hagrid almost had to drag Harry away from**_** Curses and Counter curses (Bewitch Your Friends and Befuddle Your Enemies with the Latest Revenges: Hair Loss, Jelly-Legs, Tongue-Tying and Much, Much More)**_**by Professor Vindictus Viridian.**

"**I was trying to find out how to curse Dudley."**

"**I'm not sayin' that's not a good idea,-"**

"He can talk!" Molly exclaimed.

Roxanne laughed. "-** but yer not ter use magic in the Muggle world except in very special circumstances," said Hagrid. "An' anyway, yeh couldn' work any of them curses yet, yeh'll need a lot more study before yeh get ter that level."**

**Hagrid wouldn't let Harry buy a solid gold cauldron, either ("It says pewter on yer list"), but they got a nice set of scales for weighing potion ingredients and a collapsible brass telescope. Then they visited the Apothecary, which was fascinating enough to make up for its horrible smell, a mixture of bad eggs and rotted cabbages. Barrels of slimy stuff stood on the floor; jars of herbs, dried roots, and bright powders lined the walls; bundles of feathers, strings of fangs, and snarled claws hung from the ceiling."**

"When we got my first ingredients, someone," Lily glared at James, "spilt shredded dragon liver everywhere. I slipped in it, it was horrible."

Freddie and Roxanne burst out laughing, as (surprisingly) did Ginny and Albus, but Harry patted Lily's shoulder, as slight comfort, while Teddy and Louis too laughed. And Lucy giggled. And Dominique joined in.

"**While Hagrid asked the man behind the counter for a supply of some basic potion ingredients for Harry, Harry himself examined silver unicorn horns at twenty-one Galleons each and minuscule, glittery-black beetle eyes (five Knuts a scoop).**

**Outside the Apothecary, Hagrid checked Harry's list again.**

"**Just yer wand left — A yeah, an' I still haven't got yeh a birthday present.""**

"That's nice of him," commented Lucy.

"Yeah, it was," Harry said, thinking of Hedwig and feeling slightly sad.

"**Harry felt himself go red.**

"**You don't have to —"**

"**I know I don't have to. Tell yeh what, I'll get yer animal. Not a toad, toads went outta fashion years ago, yeh'd be laughed at**, **an' I don' like cats, they make me sneeze."**

"Cats are lovely!" Hugo protested. They'd all cried whe Hermione's cat Crookshanks had died, but it fathered eight kittens, mostly given away – Lucy got one – and Freddie's god-brother Archie Jordan got one... and Hugo and Hermione kept a kitten each – Ariana and Beedle.

"**I'll get yer an owl. All the kids want owls, they're dead useful, carry yer post an' everythin'."**

**Twenty minutes later, they left Eeylops Owl Emporium, which had been dark and full of rustling and flickering, jewel-bright eyes. Harry now carried a large cage that held a beautiful snowy owl, fast asleep with her head under her wing."**

"But your owl is a tawny owl," Lily frowned.

"I had one before Dobby," Harry told her.

"**He couldn't stop stammering his thanks, sounding just like Professor Quirrell.**

"**Don' mention it," said Hagrid gruffly. "Don' expect you've had a lotta presents from them Dursleys. Just Ollivanders left now — only place fer wands, Ollivanders, and yeh gotta have the best wand."**

**A magic wand… this was what Harry had been really looking forward to."**

"It's not that exciting," James said.

"Speak for yourself," Roxanne glanced at her brother, "Fred got a bit overexcited and broke a few windows, knocked over a few shelves and nearly killed Mr Ollivanders."

"**The last shop was narrow and shabby. Peeling gold letters over the door read Ollivanders: Makers of Fine Wands since 382 B.C. A single wand lay on a faded purple cushion in the dusty window.**

**A tinkling bell rang somewhere in the depths of the shop as they stepped inside. It was a tiny place, empty except for a single, spindly chair that Hagrid sat on to wait. Harry felt strangely as though he had entered a very strict library; he swallowed a lot of new questions that had just occurred to him and looked instead at the thousands of narrow boxes piled neatly right up to the ceiling."**

"Yeah, and imagine five of these toppling over and scattering everywhere. Ollivanders made us pick them up and everything. Mum and Dad laughed at us." Freddie grinned at this memory.

" **For some reason, the back of his neck prickled.**

**The very dust and silence in here seemed to tingle with some secret magic.**

"**Good afternoon," said a soft voice. Harry jumped. Hagrid must have jumped, too, because there was a loud crunching noise and he got quickly off the spindly chair.**

**An old man was standing before them, his wide, pale eyes shining like moons through the gloom of the shop."**

"Oooh, that's not like our Mr Ollivanders," Lily exclaimed.

"Well, he sounds rather old there, he'd have to pass it on at some point," Victoire said.

Harry decided not to say anything about "his" Ollivanders, who was still alive and sent the occasional owl – he was still very friendly with Luna Lovegood.

Luna Scamander, rather. Harry always thought of her as Lovegood, it just sounded better.

""**Hello," said Harry awkwardly.**

"**Ah yes," said the man. "Yes, yes. I thought I'd be seeing you soon. Harry Potter." It wasn't a question. "You have your mother's eyes. It seems only yesterday she was in here herself, buying her first wand. Ten and a quarter inches long, swishy, made of willow. Nice wand for charm work.""**

"Hey, that's like mine," James said thoughtfully. The only difference was James' was a bit longer. And his held unicorn hair, but Ollivanders didn't seem to say what was the centre of Lily Evan's wand.

"**Mr Ollivander moved closer to Harry. Harry wished he would blink. Those silvery eyes were a bit creepy.**

"**Your father, on the other hand, favoured a mahogany wand. Eleven inches. Pliable. A little more power and excellent for transfiguration. Well, I say your father favoured it — it's really the wand that chooses the wizard, of course.""**

"What does that mean?" Rose asked curiously.

"Your mum will probably know more than we do, but I know that wands have a preference for certain people, and if you disarm another person and get their wand, it prefers you," Harry said, although he was sure his information wasn't entirely accurate. Hermione would know more.

"**Mr Ollivander had come so close that he and Harry were almost nose to nose. Harry could see himself reflected in those misty eyes.**

"**And that's where…"**

**Mr Ollivander touched the lightning scar on Harry's forehead with a long, white finger.**

"**I'm sorry to say I sold the wand that did it," he said softly. "Thirteen-and-a-half inches. Yew. Powerful wand, very powerful, and in the wrong hands… well, if I'd known what that wand was going out into the world to do…""**

"He couldn't know that," Lucy said fairly, "and if Voldemort went to Hogwarts, some teachers must have taught him things he used to use evilly."

Harry smiled. His niece was clearly very astute.

"**He shook his head and then, to Harry's relief, spotted Hagrid.**

"**Rubeus! Rubeus Hagrid! How nice to see you again… Oak, sixteen inches, rather bendy, wasn't it?"**

"**It was, sir, yes," said Hagrid.**

"**Good wand, that one. But I suppose they snapped it in half when you got expelled?" said Mr Ollivander, suddenly stern.**

"**Er — yes, they did, yes," said Hagrid, shuffling his feet. "I've still got the pieces, though," he added brightly.**

"**But you don't**_**use**_**them?" said Mr Ollivander sharply."**

"'Course not, Hagrid?" grinned Louis. Harry and Ginny also laughed.

"Did you read what he did to Dudley?" Harry grinned.

"Yeah! It was brilliant," Freddie replied gleefully.

"It was," Harry agreed.

""**Oh, no, sir," said Hagrid quickly. Harry noticed he gripped his pink umbrella very tightly as he spoke.**

"**Hmmm," said Mr Ollivander, giving Hagrid a piercing look. "Well, now — Mr Potter. Let me see." He pulled a long tape measure with silver markings out of his pocket. "Which is your wand arm?"**

"**Er — well, I'm right-handed," said Harry.**

"**Hold out your arm. That's it." He measured Harry from shoulder to finger, then wrist to elbow, shoulder to floor, knee to armpit and round his head. As he measured, he said, "Every Ollivander wand has a core of a powerful magical substance, Mr Potter. We use unicorn hairs, phoenix tail feathers, and the heartstrings of dragons."**

"I always wanted a dragon heartstring wand," Lucy said. "They sound the coolest."

Louis, Freddie, Roxanne, Mollyand Scorpius all smiled and fingered their own wands. Yes, they did like dragon heartstring.

"**No two Ollivander wands are the same, just as no two unicorns, dragons, or phoenixes are quite the same. And of course, you will never get such good results with another wizard's wand."**

**Harry suddenly realised that the tape measure, which was measuring between his nostrils, was doing this on its own."**

"Magic, Dad..."

"I know, James..."

" **Mr Ollivander was flitting around the shelves, taking down boxes.**

"**That will do," he said, and the tape measure crumpled into a heap on the floor. "Right then, Mr Potter. Try this one. Beechwood and dragon heartstring. Nine inches. Nice and flexible. just take it and give it a wave."**

**Harry took the wand and (feeling foolish) waved it around a bit, but Mr Ollivander snatched it out of his hand almost at once."**

"Boring," Freddie commented with a smile, "when I did that-"

"-The windows smashed, we've heard."

""**Maple and phoenix feather. Seven inches. Quite whippy. Try —"**

**Harry tried — but he had hardly raised the wand when it, too, was snatched back by Mr Ollivander.**

"**No, no — here, ebony and unicorn hair, eight and a half inches, springy. Go on, go on, try it out."**

**Harry tried. And tried. He had no idea what Mr Ollivander was waiting for. The pile of tried wands was mounting higher and higher on the spindly chair, but the more wands Mr Ollivander pulled from the shelves, the happier he seemed to become."**

"Funny, that's the opposite with our one," Lily said thoughtfully.

"We know, love. Your father and I got to wait while you ran through hundreds of wands."

""**Tricky customer, eh? Not to worry, we'll find the perfect match here somewhere — I wonder, now — yes, why not — unusual combination — holly and phoenix feather, eleven inches, nice and supple."**

**Harry took the wand. He felt a sudden warmth in his fingers.**

**He raised the wand above his head, brought it swishing down through the dusty air and a stream of red and gold sparks shot from the end like a firework, throwing dancing spots of light on to the walls."**

"Ooh, definitely right," Lily grinned.

"Nice one, Dad! Gryffindor from the start, eh?" James grinned.

"**Hagrid whooped and clapped and Mr Ollivander cried, "Oh, bravo! Yes, indeed, oh, very good. Well, well, well… how curious… how very curious…"**

**He put Harry's wand back into its box and wrapped it in brown paper, still muttering, "Curious… curious…""**

"What's curious?" Molly asked curiously.

Roxanne read loudly over her. "**Sorry," said Harry, "but what's curious?"**

"Yeah, Dad wouldn't make us suffer and not ask," Albus said with a smile.

"**Mr Ollivander fixed Harry with his pale stare.**

"**I remember every wand I've ever sold, Mr Potter. Every single wand. It so happens that the phoenix whose tail feather is in your wand, gave another feather — just one other. It is very curious indeed that you should be destined for this wand when its brother — why, its brother gave you that scar.""**

"Wait, what?" James looked shocked. As did Ginny, and Teddy, and Victoire, and Molly, and Rose, and Albus. But quite a few of the others looked confused.

"The phoenix your wand's centre is from is the same phoenix in the centre of Voldemort's wand..." Roxanne said slowly.

"I don't care what my wand is 'related' to, I really like my wand," Harry said firmly. Still, almost everyone in the room now looked shocked – or, at least, taken aback, and Ginny was staring thoughtfully at Harry.

""**Yes, thirteen-and-a-half inches. Yew. Curious indeed how these things happen. The wand chooses the wizard, remember… I think we must expect great things from you, Mr Potter-"**

"And he wasn't wrong," Ginny interrupted quickly. Harry smiled at her.

"-**… After all, He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named did great things — terrible, yes, but great."**

**Harry shivered. He wasn't sure he liked Mr Ollivander too much. He paid seven gold Galleons for his wand, and Mr Ollivander bowed them from his shop.**

**The late afternoon sun hung low in the sky as Harry and Hagrid made their way back down Diagon Alley, back through the wall, back through the Leaky Cauldron, now empty. Harry didn't speak at all as they walked down the road; he didn't even notice how much people were gawking at them on the Underground, laden as they were with all their funny-shaped packages, with the snowy owl asleep in its cage on Harry's lap."**

"Yeah, Muggles aren't too keen on owls," Dominique snorted. She'd dropped her owl cage once in Kings Cross, and Monty had broke free and flew around, terrifying all the Muggles.

"**Up another escalator, out into Paddington station; Harry only realised where they were when Hagrid tapped him on the shoulder.**

"**Got time fer a bite to eat before yer train leaves," he said."**

"Oh, food..." Lily said wistfully. Ginny laughed and promised her some dinner after this chapter.

"**He bought Harry a hamburger and they sat down on plastic seats to eat them. Harry kept looking around. Everything looked so strange, somehow."**

"It is a whole new world," Scorpius pointed out.

""**You all right, Harry? Yer very quiet," said Hagrid.**

**Harry wasn't sure he could explain. He'd just had the best birthday of his life — and yet — he chewed his hamburger, trying to find the words.**

"**Everyone thinks I'm special," he said at last."**

All but Harry laughed. He clearly was very special, even before he actually defeated Voldemort.

"**All those people in the Leaky Cauldron, Professor Quirrell, Mr Ollivander… but I don't know anything about magic at all. How can they expect great things? I'm famous and I can't even remember what I'm famous for."**

Teddy nodded. "Must have been weird."

"You've no idea," Harry muttered.

" **I don't know what happened when Vol-, sorry — I mean, the night my parents died."**

**Hagrid leaned across the table. Behind the wild beard and eyebrows he wore a very kind smile.**

"**Don' you worry, Harry. You'll learn fast enough. Everyone starts at the beginning at Hogwarts, you'll be just fine. Just be yerself. I know it's hard. Yeh've been singled out, an' that's always hard. But yeh'll have a great time at Hogwarts — I did — still do, 'smatter of fact.""**

"Because it's brilliant!" cut in Albus.

"**Hagrid helped Harry on to the train that would take him back to the Dursleys, then handed him an envelope.**

"**Yer ticket fer Hogwarts, " he said. "First o' September — King's Cross — it's all on yer ticket. Any problems with the Dursleys, send me a letter with yer owl, she'll know where to find me…. See yeh soon, Harry."**

**The train pulled out of the station. Harry wanted to watch Hagrid until he was out of sight; he rose in his seat and pressed his nose against the window, but he blinked and Hagrid had gone."**

"Can Hagrid apparate?" Albus asked.

"Possibly, I know you need a wand to apparate, so he shouldn't but probably could. Although, you learn apparition in sixth year and Hagrid never made it that far..." Rose looked thoughtful and turned towards her uncle.

Harry scratched his head. "I honestly don't know. I suppose not, as he flew to that hut."

"Surely he'd have used a broomstick for that?" James asked.

To this, Harry chuckled, "Yeah, James, how many broomsticks do you know of that could hold Hagrid?"

"Oh yeah..."

"Anyway, I think we all ought to have some dinner. I suppose you're all invited... I'll cook for you all, but you all have to do your bit," Ginny said the last bit very firmly, and they all nodded earnestly.


	6. 6:Journeyfrom Enter more people

**. I uh, only really gave this a tinsy little edit at the end... Totally sorry about semi-abandoning this. I'm going to say I'll have chapter seven up by midnight, but erm, it's 6:19pm, I'm a horrendous procrastinator, I'd like to watch The Simpsons and maybe Skins, and I've so far done... 1/13 pages for Sorting Hat. Oh well, hopefully this ridiculous target will get me to upload it quickly. Awfully sorry, especially considering I also said I wouldn't abandon it... **

**Which reminds me. I come off awfully arrogant at the start of this. But I'm cool with that. Makes me die with shame when I read it, and that's an incentive to write more. **

Roxanne surveyed the scene. It was busy, of course – it was Grimmauld Place. It had always been a busy house.

Roxanne's Aunt Ginny was cooking, Victoire and Teddy helping (actually, they did most of it; Ginny's cooking wasn't the best), the rest of the Weasley-Potter clan was just pissing about, pretending to set the table. Other than Lily, who remained firmly attached to her father's side? Harry was actually delighted by this; he always worried his little girl was growing up too fast.

Freddie and Hugo were immersed in a conversation – talking about Jim Parkins in their dorm.

There was another loud _cough_. Ahh. Uncle Ron in the fireplace – well, his head was.

"Uncle Ron?" She scrambled nearer him.

"Roxanne! How are you?" Her uncle grinned at her.

Hearing them, Hugo and Rose turned around. "Dad!" they cried.

"Ron?" Harry nodded at him.

"Blimey, Gin's not cooking for you all, is she?"

Harry chuckled. "'Fraid so."

"Blimey," Ron said again. "She's worse than Hermione – and that's saying something!"

"Ron!" they all heard Hermione yell reproachfully at him.

"Actually, Ron..." Harry said thoughtfully, "Well, fancy coming over?"

"Uh, sure? HERMIONE," Ron yelled behind him.

"WHAT?"

"HARRY SAYS WE CAN COME OVER TO EAT IF WE WANT!"

"OH, DID HE? I'D LOVE TO, JUST GIVE ME A FEW MINUTES."

"ALL RIGHT! Yeah, I'm up for it."

Rose rolled her eyes at this exchange.

It wasn't long before Ron and Hermione Weasley joined the table too. Harry was beginning to feel nostalgic for old times at the Burrow – although, it was Harry's birthday quite soon. It wouldn't be long before they all got together again, but, still...

"So," Harry began, grinning at his oldest friends. "The kids found some... interesting books."

Ron paled. "Oh, Merlin, no."

Harry, Hermione and Ginny all looked at him suspiciously.

"...Wait, not sex-"

"Ron!" Hermione chided him quickly.

"No, Ron. Just... no." Ginny rolled her eyes.

Harry handed over the books. He reasoned, if anyone ever deserved the right to read these books, it was definitely Ron and Hermione.

Hermione flicked through them with great interest, "Oh, Harry!"

"Wait, these are about you?" Ron looked utterly beweiledered.

"Yeah," he nodded.

"Who's J K Rowling?" Hermione asked.

"Uh, I don't know. To be honest, when I first saw it, I thought Rita Skeeter..."

Hermione's eye twitched at this.

James had caught on to the conversation, "And Uncle Ron, Aunt Hermione, Dad's just been to Diagon Alley."

Freddie joined in enthusiastically, "and-"

The doorbell went.

Harry jumped automatically – he always did, even though, whilst Mrs Black was still on the wall, George had been able to cast a spell that left her gagged.

And, speaking of, it was George Weasley at the door. This really was feeling like The Burrow now.

George had a smattering of soot across his face, was lacking an eyebrow, and a lot of the hair covering his missing ear had gone.

"All right, Harry?" George smiled at him.

Harry raised an eyebrow and opened the door, wordlessly inviting him in, shaking his head as he did so.

"George? Looking good." Ron said sarcastically, as James and Louis laughed at George's appearance, whilst Freddie and Roxanne looked entirely unsurprised.

"What are you doing here?" Ginny asked him.

"Experiment went wrong... Angelina said she's tired of living in a Hippogriff's Hovel... told me to clear off and find my children while she cleans up. Apparently it's irresponsible not to know where they are when they aren't of age... who knew?" George took a seat at the table and helped himself to some lemon tart.

"Yeuch, Ginny made this, I'm guessing? Gin, you're not sweet enough to make this without sugar."

Ginny rolled her eyes at her brother.

"George, have you looked in a mirror lately?"

"No?"

Ginny summoned a mirror, and George too looked amused at his appearance. A few waves of his wand and he looked relatively normal.

"Dad, guess what?" Roxanne said excitably to him. Harry exchanged glances with Ginny, with Ron and with Hermione, and he was fairly sure they all felt similarly.

George never had gotten over Fred's death. Would these books be good for him or ruin the man?

Roxanne had caught the tension and hadn't continued. And if Roxanne had caught the tension – Roxanne, who was normally far too wrapped up in her own world where she and Freddie were the bowtruckle's knuckles, Lily and Hugo occasionally getting a look in, well, of course George noticed something.

"What?" He said, looking at each of them in turn, his pleasant manner still there but a lot less jokey than before.

He caught sight of the books and took them from Hermione, looking interested. After he'd flicked through them – the whole room had caught on that they were slightly tense and were now all staring at George (whose remaining ear had gone red from way they were all watching him) - he looked up, looking slightly confused.

"Why are you all so... quiet?" He narrowed his eyes slightly, then realised. He rolled his eyes in an exaggerated fashion.

"Right. Because the mention of Fred gets me sobbing and unable to live," George said. He was joking, clearly, but his eyes were hard.

"Dad, so far, Uncle Harry's been dumped on the Dursley's doorstep, he's talked to a snake, met Hagrid-"

"-Don't forgot ridden a flying motorcycle!"

"-And met Mr Ollivander the first-"

"-And the Dursley's are horrible-"

Harry was slightly amused by how Freddie and Roxanne summed up the book so far.

"-His bedroom was the cupboard under the stairs-"

"-Dudley's a spoiled prick-"

"Freddie," Ginny chided quietly, before-

"What? A cupboard?" Ron was a bit bewildered and presumed Freddie was exaggerating.

"He lived in a cupboard under the stairs, Dad!" Hugo cried, looking angry.

"What?" Ron looked at Harry with a concerned expression, hoping for his friend to say he was wrong. And when Harry didn't, Ron looked absolutely furious.

Hermione's jaw had dropped and she drew Harry into a tight hug. Over Hermione's shoulder, Harry could see George's shocked expression and Ginny's furious face.

"Shit, Harry," was the only thing George was able to offer, but Ginny grabbed him as soon as Hermione relinquished her hold on him and hugged him so tightly that he thought his ribs might crack.

"Ginny... it was ages ago, after I got the Hogwarts letter they moved me into a bedroom..."

While Harry was being squeezed to death, he was able to think more than he'd previously done about this book.

Hermione had been tortured. Ron's deepest fears were in this. Harry's innermost feelings. What if it showed the aftermath of Fred's death? He didn't think Hugo and Rose should read about Ron shouting at anyone and everything, didn't think it'd be good for Freddie and Roxanne to hear how George had barely coped, there being times that Harry had even thought it'd be less cruel to George, and to all of them, just to let him get what he wanted and rejoin Fred. He didn't want Lily, Albus and James reading how many nights Harry had sat up comforting their mother as she cried – and their many nights doing other things. And his face grew warm as he remembered his wedding night, and imagined his children reading this.

Although, it would be nice for them all to get to know Fred properly, instead of sad memories, and Teddy would get to know his parents – that would be nice. And it would mean Harry would never have to properly tell his children what had happened to him...

Could he flick through it and see which bits he'd not allow them to read? Although, according to Roxanne, it was in a Muggle's children section; it couldn't be too bad.

Ginny pulled away and looked at him with the intensity of their first kiss, but it was much more solemn than this. She hugged him again.

Harry was feeling a bit awkward at all of this emotion around all of these children.

"So, George, you in?" He said, trying to diffuse the emotion.

"I... Yeah, 'course I'm in," he said nodding.

"Can we read more? Hugo asked excitedly.

"All right," Harry smiled.

And they got settled in the drawing room and looked expectantly at Hermione, who was holding the first book again, having taken it from George again. She sighed. "Well, what page?"

"Chapter six," Teddy informed her.

Hermione settled in an armchair and read, "**Chapter Six: The Journey from Platform Nine and Three-Quarters."**

Here were a few woops and cheers, Hogwarts was coming.

"**Harry's last month with the Dursleys wasn't fun."** Hermione's eyes narrowed as she read this.

"**True, Dudley was now so scared of Harry he wouldn't stay in the same room, while Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon didn't shut Harry in his cupboard,-"**

"Bloody well hope not!" Ron said furiously, and Ginny's lips were so tight that she could pass for McGonagall.

"-** force him to do anything, or shout at him — in fact, they didn't speak to him at all."**

"Sounds better to me," Louis commented. Harry smiled.

"**Half terrified, half furious, they acted as though any chair with Harry in it were empty."**

"Think it probably was better," Harry said.

"**Although this was an improvement in many ways, it did become a bit depressing after a while."**

"With only yourself for company, I can imagine," George commented.

Harry narrowed his eyes. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing, nothing of course."

" **Harry kept to his room, with his new owl for company."**

Hedwig. Harry smiled. She was absolutely wonderful, and in her memory, he'd never gotten another owl.

" **He had decided to call her Hedwig, a name he had found in**_**A History of Magic**_**. His school books were very interesting."**

"Dad! Are you kidding?" James looked disgusted and Ginny gave him a slightly withering look.

"**He lay on his bed reading late into the night,-"**

"Again?" James moaned more, but after a variety of glares of different intensities, he cut it out.

"**Hedwig swooping in and out of the open window as she pleased. It was lucky that Aunt Petunia didn't come in to vacuum anymore, because Hedwig kept bringing back dead mice."**

"Maurice likes to do that," Roxanne commented.

"Yes, I know," George said, "It's me who always has to deal with them."

Roxanne grinned. It was true. Every time her owl brought in a dead animal, she'd scream. And so would Angelina.

"**Every night before he went to sleep, Harry ticked off another day on the piece of paper he had pinned to the wall, counting down to September the first."**

Ginny grinned, "I did that!"

"Really?" James said.

Albus snorted. "James, I saw the calendar you made."

James faintly blushed. "Lily did too," he grumbled. Hugo grinned and said he did too, and so did Dominique. Even Hermione nodded, saying she'd started a calendar as soon as her primary school ended.

"**On the last day of August he thought he'd better speak to his aunt and uncle about getting to King's Cross station the next day," – **

"Yes," Hermione rolled her eyes, "that might be something you'd want to do."

"-** so he went down to the living room where they were watching a quiz show on television."**

"The moving picture box thing?" Louis asked.

"Yes," Harry, Hermione and strangely enough, George, answered.

George answered Harry's questioning look with "Muggle women," and a wink.

Ginny wrinkled her nose.

"**He cleared his throat to let them know he was there, and Dudley screamed and ran from the room."**

"Pathetic!" Freddie snorted.

George smiled. "Wait 'til you see him meeting us."

Hermione rolled her eyes, not looking impressed, but Harry was laughing at the memory, and Ron and Ginny were grinning.

""**Er — Uncle Vernon?"**

**Uncle Vernon grunted to show he was listening."**

"Sounds like a delight, your uncle," George commented.

""**Er — I need to be at King's Cross tomorrow to — to go to Hogwarts."**

**Uncle Vernon grunted again.**

"**Would it be all right if you gave me a lift?"**

**Grunt. Harry supposed that meant yes.**

"**Thank you.""**

"You're too polite," Dominique said. Harry smiled.

"**He was about to go back upstairs when Uncle Vernon actually spoke."**

"Blimey, lucky you!" George said.

""**Funny way to get to a wizards' school, the train. Magic carpets all got punctures, have they?""**

"Actually-" Hermione and Molly spoke at the same time, and both ushered the other on whilst blushing.

"Actually," Molly continued, "they're illegal."

"We know," Lucy rolled her eyes. Ron winked at Hermione.

"**Harry didn't say anything.**

"**Where is this school, anyway?"**

**"****I don't know," said Harry, realising this for the first time. He pulled the ticket Hagrid had given him out of his pocket.** "**I just take the train from platform nine and three-quarters at eleven o'clock," he read.**

**His aunt and uncle stared.**

"**Platform what?""**

"Nine and three-quarters!" Hugo, Freddie and Roxanne yelled.

""**Nine and three-quarters."**

"**Don't talk rubbish," said Uncle Vernon. "There is no platform nine and three-quarters.""**

"Yeah there is!" the same three yelled.

"Oh, honestly," Molly said, exasperated, "we know that, we go every year!"

""**It's on my ticket."**

"**Barking," said Uncle Vernon, "howling mad, the lot of them."**

"Us?" James raised an eyebrow. "We're not the ones who pick out the most boring tie, mate." He shook his head.

"**You'll see. You just wait. All right, we'll take you to King's Cross. We're going up to London tomorrow anyway, or I wouldn't bother."** Ugh, Harry, why didn't you tell us what a pig he was? We'd have taken you out of there immediately!" Hermione interrupted herself.

"I kind of did. And Dumbledore wanted me back at the Dursley's. That magic that, you know, saved my life a bit," Harry replied.

"Besides," George grinned, "I think some of us performed an excellent rescue."

Albus made to ask but Hermione read over him. It would come up later.

""**Why are you going to London?" Harry asked, trying to keep things friendly."**

"Doesn't deserve it," Scorpius muttered.

"Yeah, I know," Harry grinned. Scorpius went slightly red, not having meant for Harry to hear. He didn't know how to act around Harry properly, even if he had spent most of the past few summers in his house.

""**Taking Dudley to the hospital," growled Uncle Vernon. "Got to have that ruddy tail removed before he goes to Smeltings.""**

Teddy laughed. "That would make for an interesting hospital trip."

Harry laughed too, "Yeah, I'm quite upset I got to miss that. But, I s'pose, Hogwarts just beat that..."

"**Harry woke at five o'clock the next morning and was too excited and nervous to go back to sleep."**

"Bless!" Roxanne said again, although she had done that her first year.

"**He got up and pulled on his jeans because he didn't want to walk into the station in his wizard's robes —he'd change on the train. He checked his Hogwarts list yet again to make sure he had everything he needed,-"**

"I think it's best to make a list and tick everything off," Molly said in a very pompous tone.

"What, make a list and check it twice?" Freddie grinned.

Molly felt sure she was the butt of a joke, but couldn't understand it, so simply frowned with disapproval at her cousin.

"**-saw that Hedwig was shut safely in her cage, and then paced the room, waiting for the Dursleys to get up.**

**Two hours later, Harry's huge, heavy trunk had been loaded into the Dursleys' car, Aunt Petunia had talked Dudley into sitting next to Harry,-"**

"What else would he do," Ron asked, "sit on the roof?"

"It wouldn't be able to take his weight," Harry remarked dryly.

"**-and they had set off.**

**They reached King's Cross at half past ten. Uncle Vernon dumped Harry's trunk onto a cart and wheeled it into the station for him."** Hermione stopped and frowned, noticing something was clearly not right.

"Thats..." Victoire too frowned, "that's oddly nice."

"**Harry thought this was strangely kind until Uncle Vernon stopped dead, facing the platforms with a nasty grin on his face.**

"**Well, there you are, boy. Platform nine — platform ten. Your platform should be somewhere in the middle, but they don't seem to have built it yet, do they?""**

"Twat."

"James!"

"To be fair, Ginny, it's true."

"Harry, set a good example, will you?"

"**He was quite right, of course. There was a big plastic number nine over one platform and a big plastic number ten over the one next to it, and in the middle, nothing at all.**

"**Have a good term," said Uncle Vernon with an even nastier smile. He left without another word. Harry turned and saw the Dursleys drive away. All three of them were laughing."**

"What wankers!"

Ginny, Hermione and Molly looked over at George, waiting for him to chide his son.

George winked at Freddie.

"Freddie, don't use that word," Hermione said, sounding highly exasperated.

Freddie grinned.

"**Harry's mouth went rather dry. What on earth was he going to do? He was starting to attract a lot of funny looks, because of Hedwig. He'd have to ask someone. He stopped a passing guard, but didn't dare mention platform nine and three-quarters.**

**The guard had never heard of Hogwarts-"**

"Course not, he's a Muggle, honestly Dad!" Lily interrupted.

"I know now, Lily..."

"-**and when Harry couldn't even tell him what part of the country it was in, he started to get annoyed, as though Harry was being stupid on purpose."**

"Nah," Ron grinned, "that's just Harry shining through."

Ginny slapped his head.

"**Getting desperate, Harry asked for the train that left at eleven o'clock, but the guard said there wasn't one.**

**In the end the guard strode away, muttering about time wasters. Harry was now trying hard not to panic."**

"Actually," Hermione stopped, "they really ought to make things easier for Muggleborns and those from Muggle families."

"How'd you get through?" Harry asked.

"Oh, when Professor McGonagall came to my house, she gave instructions of how to get to the train."

"What?" Harry cried, "how come you get an actual teacher there first time! I had to wait weeks for Hagrid to come!"

"I suppose they thought your aunt would know enough," Hermione mused.

"She probably did," Harry said bitterly.

"**According to the large clock over the arrivals board, he had ten minutes left to get on the train to Hogwarts and he had no idea how to do it; he was stranded in the middle of a station with a trunk he could hardly lift, a pocket full of wizard money, and a large owl."**

"Up the creek without a paddle, right Uncle Harry?" Hugo said excitedly.

"Uh, sure, Hugh."

"**Hagrid must have forgotten to tell him something you had to do, like tapping the third brick on the left to get into Diagon Alley. He wondered if he should get out his wand and start tapping the ticket inspector's stand between platforms nine and ten."**

"Uncle Harry, that's quite a bad idea." Rose frowned.

"Luckily, Rose, I thought the same," Harry smiled.

"**At that moment a group of people passed just behind him and he caught a few words of what they were saying.**

"— **packed with Muggles, of course —""**

"Enter Weasleys," Ron grinned.

"**Harry swung round. The speaker was a plump woman who was talking to four boys, all with flaming red hair."**

All of the older generation got a sad expression on their face. The four boys were clearly Ron, George, Fred and Percy.

"**Each of them was pushing a trunk like Harry's in front of him — and they had an**_**owl**_**.**

**Heart hammering, Harry pushed his cart after them. They stopped and so did he, just near enough to hear what they were saying.**

"**Now, what's the platform number?" said the boys' mother."**

"Mum's _so_ unsubtle," Ginny smiled, shaking her head.

""**Nine and three-quarters!" piped a small girl, also red-headed, who was holding her hand, "Mum, can't I go…"**

"**You're not old enough, Ginny, now be quiet."**

The older Ginny blushed, remembering how much of an embarrassment her younger self was.

"**All right, Percy, you go first."**

**What looked like the oldest boy-"**

"Sorry mate," George smiled, "got two more above that."

"**-marched toward platforms nine and ten.**

**Harry watched, careful not to blink in case he missed it — but just as the boy reached the dividing barrier between the two platforms, a large crowd of tourists came swarming in front of him and by the time the last backpack had cleared away, the boy had vanished." **Hermione hesitated a moment before continuing.

""**Fred, you next," the plump woman said.**

"**I'm not Fred, I'm George," said the boy. "Honestly, woman, you call yourself our mother? Can't you**_**tell**_**I'm George?"" ** The silence had grown. For the younger generation, this was the first proper introduction to Fred Weasley the first. For the older generation, it was a reminder – a memory for all but Hermione – of the great Fred Weasley.

""**Sorry, George, dear."**

"**Only joking, I am Fred,""**

There were some appreciative laughs.

"**-said the boy, and off he went. His twin called after him to hurry up, and he must have done so, because a second later, he had gone — but how had he done it?"**

"Harry, you've clearly heard our names. Why is he 'the boy' and I'm 'his twin'?" George asked, too casually.

"I haven't a clue, sorry about that..."

"**Now the third brother was walking briskly toward the barrier he was almost there — and then, quite suddenly, he wasn't anywhere."**

"Wait, what?" Rose asked. "Uncle Percy's gone, Uncle Fred's gone and so's Uncle George, who's the third?"

No one could answer that.

"A misprint?" Albus suggested.

"**There was nothing else for it.**

"**Excuse me," Harry said to the plump woman.**

"**Hello, dear," she said. "First time at Hogwarts? Ron's new, too.""**

"Dad!" Hugo cried out happily. Ron sat back and stretched, grinning.

"**She pointed at the last and youngest of her sons. He was tall, thin, and gangling, with freckles, big hands and feet, and a long nose."**

Ron stopped grinning and sat forward a bit. "That's really flattering, thanks mate."

Harry laughed.

""**Yes," said Harry. "The thing is — the thing is, I don't know how to —"**

"**How to get onto the platform?" she said kindly, and Harry nodded.**

"**Not to worry," she said. "All you have to do is walk straight at the barrier between platforms nine and ten. Don't stop and don't be scared you'll crash into it, that's very important. Best do it at a bit of a run if you're nervous."**

"Can't help but think running would make it more nerve wracking," Teddy commented.

" **Go on, go now before Ron."**

"**Er — okay," said Harry.**

**He pushed his trolley around and stared at the barrier. It looked very solid.**

**He started to walk toward it. People jostled him on their way to platforms nine and ten. Harry walked more quickly. He was going to smash right into that barrier and then he'd be in trouble –"**

"Have faith!" Lucy cried.

"— **leaning forward on his cart, he broke into a heavy run — the barrier was coming nearer and nearer — he wouldn't be able to stop — the cart was out of control — he was a foot away — he closed his eyes ready for the crash — It didn't come…"**

"See!" Lucy laughed.

"**-he kept on running… he opened his eyes. A scarlet steam engine was waiting next to a platform packed with people. A sign overhead said**_**Hogwarts' Express, eleven o'clock**_**."**

"Is the platform only for one train?" Roxanne asked.

Hermione thought for a second, but it was Victoire to answer. "No, more trains go from there but they aren't nearly as popular as the Hogwarts' Express."

"**Harry looked behind him and saw a wrought-iron archway where the barrier had been, with the words**_**Platform Nine and Three-Quarters**_**on it. He had done it."**

"We're very proud, Dad," Albus said sarcastically.

"Oi."

"**Smoke from the engine drifted over the heads of the chattering crowd, while cats of every colour wound here and there between their legs. Owls hooted to one another in a disgruntled sort of way over the babble and the scraping of heavy trunks.**

**The first few carriages were already packed with students, some hanging out of the window to talk to their families, some fighting over seats."**

"If you set off a few SmellBells-" Freddie began.

"Freddie." Ginny said sternly.

"**Harry pushed his cart off down the platform in search of an empty seat. He passed a round-faced boy who was saying, "Gran, I've lost my toad again."**

"**Oh,**_**Neville**_**," he heard the old woman sigh."**

"_Neville_?" Dominique frowned, "not Professor Longbottom?"

"The one and the same," Ron laughed.

"A toad, really?" Freddie wrinkled his nose.

"**A boy with dreadlocks was surrounded by a small crowd.**

"**Give us a look, Lee, go on.""**

"Lee!" Roxanne and Freddie exclaimed. George grinned.

"**The boy lifted the lid of a box in his arms, and the people around him shrieked and yelled as something inside poked out a long, hairy leg."**

Ron pulled a face.

"**Harry pressed on through the crowd until he found an empty compartment near the end of the train. He put Hedwig inside first and then started to shove and heave his trunk toward the train door. He tried to lift it up the steps but could hardly raise one end and twice he dropped it painfully on his foot."**

James, Louis, Freddie and Roxanne all sniggered.

""**Want a hand?" It was one of the red-haired twins he'd followed through the barrier."**

Ginny raised an eyebrow. "That's oddly kind."

""**Yes, please," Harry panted.**

"**Oy, Fred! C'mere and help!""**

"Ah," Ginny dropped the eyebrow, "of course it was you. Fred wouldn't be so helpful."

George didn't comment.

"**With the twins' help, Harry's trunk was at last tucked away in a corner of the compartment.**

"**Thanks," said Harry, pushing his sweaty hair out of his eyes."**

"Pfft," George smiled, "like you did anything."

Harry laughed.

""**What's that?" said one of the twins suddenly, pointing at Harry's lightning scar.**

"**Blimey," said the other twin. "Are you —?"**

"**He is," said the first twin. "Aren't you?" he added to Harry.**

"Who-" Molly started.

"I'm 'the other twin'," George replied, frowning.

""**What?" said Harry.**

"_**Harry Potter**_**." chorused the twins.**

"**Oh, him," said Harry."**

They all chuckled and Harry turned faintly red.

"Jeez, Dad," James tried not to smile, "thought you were cooler than that."

"I'm very cool, James."

"Sure you are."

"Hermione grinned and continued, "**I mean, yes, I am."**

The laughs were louder, at how well James and Harry's conversation fit into the book.

"**The two boys gawked at him,-"**

"Honestly," Ginny looked at George with a teasing expression, "you're so rude. Don't gawk."

George snorted. "You seem to have forgotten how you acted around Harry when you were younger."

"**-and Harry felt himself turning red. Then, to his relief, a voice came floating in through the train's open door.**

"**Fred? George? Are you there?"**

"**Coming, Mum."**

**With a last look at Harry, the twins hopped off the train."**

George let out his breath. It wasn't as painful as he thought, hearing about him and Fred. 'Course, it would probably get harder, but it was all right for now.

"**Harry sat down next to the window where, half hidden, he could watch the red-haired family on the platform and hear what they were saying.**

**Their mother had just taken out her handkerchief.**

"**Ron, you've got something on your nose.""**

Ron went red.

"Smooth," Hugo muttered.

Hermione laughed.

"**The youngest boy tried to jerk out of the way, but she grabbed him and began rubbing the end of his nose.**

"_**Mum**_— **geroff" He wriggled free."**

"Nah," George shook his head, "you can never get free from Mum."

""**Aaah, has ickle Ronnie got somefink on his nosie?" said one of the twins."**

Freddie opened his mouth but George beat him to it.

"Fred," he said.

""**Shut up," said Ron.**

"**Where's Percy?" said their mother.**

"**He's coming now."**

**The oldest boy came striding into sight. He had already changed into his billowing black Hogwarts robes, and Harry noticed a red and gold badge on his chest with the letter**_**P**_**on it."**

"Seen that badge far too much," George looked over at Molly and winked. He was very happy to see that she didn't copy her father and wear the badge in holidays.

""**Can't stay long, Mother," he said. "I'm up front, the prefects have got two compartments to themselves —""**

"Oh, Merlin," George pretended to shudder. Hugo and Freddie laughed.

"**Oh, are you a**_**prefect**_**, Percy?" said one of the twins, with an air of great surprise. "You should have said something, we had no idea."**

"**Hang on, I think I remember him saying something about it," said the other twin. "Once —"**

"**Or twice —"**

"**A minute —"**

"**All summer —""**

The laughs were loud and plentiful.

""**Oh, shut up," said Percy the Prefect.**

"**How come Percy gets new robes, anyway?" said one of the twins."**

"What do you mean, 'gets new robes'?" Scorpius asked.

Ron again went slightly red, but the embarrassment of once being poor didn't seem to affect George or Ginny – mind, Ginny being the only girl meant that, as a child, she was the most likely of them to get new clothes. And Bill, of course, who was always the tallest of them.

"No money. Percy was a prefect so he got to have unworn robes. I spent most of my Hogwarts days in Charlie's old robes, and he was a fat teenager, I'll tell you that," George replied with a smile.

"Oh." Scorpius couldn't imagine having hand-me-downs. Although, neither could any of the younger generation – although Lucy and Dominique often nicked their older sister's clothes.

""**Because he's a**_**prefect**_**," said their mother fondly. "All right, dear, well, have a good term — send me an owl when you get there."**

**She kissed Percy on the cheek and he left. Then she turned to the twins.**

"**Now, you two — this year, you behave yourselves. If I get one more owl telling me you've — you've blown up a toilet or —""**

"_Brilliant _idea!" Freddie and Hugo shared a gleeful glance.

"Eww, what if it like, backfired or something?" Roxanne wrinkled her nose.

""**Blown up a toilet? We've never blown up a toilet."**

"**Great idea though, thanks, Mum.""**

They all laughed again.

""**It's**_**not funny**_**."**

"Yeah it is, Grandma," James laughed.

"**And look after Ron."**

"**Don't worry, ickle Ronniekins is safe with us.""**

Ron blushed. Again. George smiled and leaned over, pinching his cheek.

"Aw, bless widdle Wonnie."

""**Shut up," said Ron again. He was almost as tall as the twins already and his nose was still pink where his mother had rubbed it.**

"**Hey, Mum, guess what? Guess who we just met on the train?""**

"Were you really that famous, Dad?" Lily asked.

"Well, you know, he did save everyone from Voldemort for thirteen years," Ron said.

"Ten, really, by then," corrected Hermione.

Ron rolled his eyes, "whatever. Still was the 'Chosen One'."

"Nah, I wasn't. Wasn't that until Sixth Year," corrected Harry.

"Whatever," Ron said again.

"**Harry leaned back quickly so they couldn't see him looking.**

"**You know that black-haired boy who was near us in the station? Know who he is?"**

"**Who?"**

"_**Harry Potter**_**!"**

**Harry heard the little girl's voice.**

"**Oh, Mum, can I go on the train and see him, Mum, oh please…""**

"Oh, Merlin..." Ginny hid her scarlet face in her hands.

"It was cute," Harry tried to reassure her, but it didn't help that James, Louis and Roxanne were laughing.

""**You've already seen him, Ginny, and the poor boy isn't something you goggle at in a zoo. Is he really, Fred? How do you know?""**

"Grandma isn't that much better," Rose smiled.

""**Asked him. Saw his scar. It's really there — like lightning."**

"**Poor**_**dear**_— **no wonder he was alone, I wondered. He was ever so polite when he asked how to get onto the platform."**

"**Never mind that, do you think he remembers what You-Know-Who looks like?""**

Ginny and Ron snorted. "Only Fred would be so blunt," said Ron.

"**Their mother suddenly became very stern.**

"**I forbid you to ask him, Fred. No, don't you dare. As though he needs reminding of that on his first day at school.""**

"I reckon I need to thank your mother for more things than I realised," Harry shook his head.

""**All right, keep your hair on."**

**A whistle sounded.**

"**Hurry up!" their mother said, and the three boys clambered onto the train. They leaned out of the window for her to kiss them good-bye, and their younger sister began to cry."**

"Aww, Mum," Lily smiled at her mother, and Ron threw a hand over her shoulder, which she shrugged off.

"It was lonely with just me and Mum in the house, with Dad in the evening."

""**Don't, Ginny, we'll send you loads of owls."**

"**We'll send you a Hogwarts' toilet seat."**

"_**George!**_"

"**Only joking, Mum.""**

"Dad, did you?" Freddie asked over the laughs.

"No, they didn't!" Ginny said.

"Hey," George winked at Harry, "it went to a much better use."

"**The train began to move. Harry saw the boys' mother waving and their sister, half laughing, half crying, running to keep up with the train until it gathered too much speed, then she fell back and waved." **

"You didn't have too bad a year, did you, Gin?" Ron asked her.

"It might have been nicer if you lot wrote me a letter once in a while." Ginny sent an evil look in George and Ron's directions, who both got sheepish expressions.

"**Harry watched the girl and her mother disappear as the train rounded the corner. Houses flashed past the window. Harry felt a great leap of excitement. He didn't know what he was going to — but it had to be better than what he was leaving behind."**

"Oh, Dad," James nodded, "it will be."

"I'm with you there," Harry laughed.

"**The door of the compartment slid open and the youngest redheaded boy came in."**

"You didn't even get his name? It's Ronniekins, c'mon," George grinned.

"Oh, shut up."

""**Anyone sitting there?" he asked, pointing at the seat opposite Harry."Everywhere else is full."**

**Harry shook his head and the boy sat down. He glanced at Harry and then looked quickly out of the window, pretending he hadn't looked."**

""Casual, Dad," Hugo looked very unimpressed.

"**Harry saw he still had a black mark on his nose.**

"**Hey, Ron."**

**The twins were back."**

"Yeah!" cried Roxanne and Freddie. George winked at his children.

""**Listen, we're going down the middle of the train — Lee Jordan's got a giant tarantula down there."**

"**Right," mumbled Ron.**

"**Harry," said the other twin, "did we introduce ourselves? Fred and George Weasley."**

George winced. It had been a while since they were introduced as this.

"**And this is Ron, our brother. See you later, then."**

"**Bye," said Harry and Ron. The twins slid the compartment door shut behind them.**

"**Are you really Harry Potter?" Ron blurted out."**

"Who else would he be?" Dominique smiled.

Again, Ron blushed. He was quite embarrassing in this chapter.

"**Harry nodded.**

"**Oh — well, I thought it might be one of Fred and George's jokes," said Ron."**

"That'd be a pretty poor joke," George said, "we were much better than that."

"Yeah, I thought you might have been doing it to wind up Ginny."

"Hey!"

**"And have you really got — you know…"**

**He pointed at Harry's forehead."**

"Oh, honestly, Ronald. Some sensitivity would be nice," Hermione rolled her eyes.

"Hey! You wait, woman, see your entrance."

"Woman?" Hermione shot Ron a terrifying glare.

"Yeah, you heard me." This would be more convincingly badass if Ron hadn't squeaked half way through. Satisfied, Hermione continued. "**Harry pulled back his fringe to show the lightning scar. Ron stared.**

"**So that's where You-Know-Who —?"**

"**Yes," said Harry, "but I can't remember it."**

"**Nothing?" said Ron eagerly."**

"'Eagerly'?" Victoire looked amused, but a bit shocked all the same.

""**Well — I remember a lot of green light, but nothing else."**

"**Wow," said Ron. He sat and stared at Harry for a few moments, then, as though he had suddenly realised what he was doing, he looked quickly out of the window again."**

"Dad, this is highly embarrassing for Hugo and me, you know?"

"It's highly embarrassing for me too, Rosie, don't worry."

""**Are all your family wizards?" asked Harry, who found Ron just as interesting as Ron found him.**

"**Er — Yes, I think so," said Ron. "I think Mum's got a second cousin who's an accountant, but we never talk about him.""**

"Why not?" Lucy rose up with injustice.

"Hey," Ron held his hands out, palms forward, "he was the one to abandon us, not the other way around."

""**So you must know loads of magic already."**

**The Weasleys were clearly one of those old wizarding families the pale boy in Diagon Alley had talked about."**

"Oy!"

"Sorry," Harry apologised, "I didn't mean exactly like him. And sorry too, Scorpius. Your dad was just-"

"A bit of a git, I know," Scorpius nodded.

""**I heard you went to live with Muggles," said Ron. "What are they like?"**

"**Horrible — well, not all of them. My aunt and uncle and cousin are, though. Wish I'd had three wizard brothers."**

"**Five," said Ron. For some reason, he was looking gloomy."**

"Oy, Ron, what's wrong with us?"

"Nothing," Ron mumbled. He wasn't best pleased that a lot of his family would learn all his insecurities. At least his thoughts weren't the ones in view.

""**I'm the sixth in our family to go to Hogwarts.** **You could say I've got a lot to live up to. Bill and Charlie have already left — Bill was head boy and Charlie was captain of Quidditch.**

**Now Percy's a prefect. Fred and George mess around a lot, but they still get really good marks and everyone thinks they're really funny."**

"'Good marks'? Three OWLs isn't good marks, Ron," Ginny raised her eyebrow.

"Hey, we didn't do too badly until it mattered," George said fairly. "And we were bloody brilliant in lessons."

"I'm sure," Ginny snorted.

" **Everyone expects me to do as well as the others, but if I do, it's no big deal, because they did it first."**

Ron squirmed a bit. This was getting awkward, especially as Ginny and George were frowning at him.

"**You never get anything new, either, with five brothers. I've got Bill's old robes, Charlie's old wand, and Percy's old rat."**

**Ron reached inside his jacket and pulled out a fat grey rat, which was asleep."**

Harry stiffened at the mention of the rat. So did Ron, actually. Peter Pettigrew had shared his bed... Ron shuddered.

""**His name's Scabbers and he's useless, he hardly ever wakes up.** **Percy got an owl from my dad for being made a prefect, but they couldn't aff — I mean, I got Scabbers instead."**

**Ron's ears went pink.**

**He seemed to think he'd said too much, because he went back to staring out of the window."**

"You were so smooth back then," Harry laughed at his friend, trying to ease him a little.

"**Harry didn't think there was anything wrong with not being able to afford an owl. After all, he'd never had any money in his life until a month ago, and he told Ron so, all about having to wear Dudley's old clothes and never getting proper birthday presents. This seemed to cheer Ron up."**

Teddy laughed, "Really?"

Ron couldn't possibly get redder.

""… **and until Hagrid told me, I didn't know anything about being a wizard or about my parents or Voldemort —"**

**Ron gasped."**

"Oh, _honestly_, Ron!"

"Oh, sorry Hermione, but you'll be doing the same until fifth year."

""**What?" said Harry.**

"_**You said You-Know-Who's name!**_" **said Ron, sounding both shocked and impressed. "I'd have thought you, of all people —"**

"**I'm not trying to be**_**brave**_**or anything, saying the name," said Harry, "I just never knew you shouldn't. See what I mean? I've got loads to learn… I bet," he added, voicing for the first time something that had been worrying him a lot lately, "I bet I'm the worst in the class.""**

"Dad, that can't be your worry." James looked deeply upset by this.

"Besides, you were perfectly fine in class," Hermione said in a resolute tone.

""**You won't be. There's loads of people who come from Muggle families and they learn quick enough.""**

"Or faster, if you're Hermione," Ginny said. Hermione blushed.

"**While they had been talking, the train had carried them out of London. Now they were speeding past fields full of cows and sheep. They were quiet for a time, watching the fields and lanes flick past."**

"Pfft," Freddie said, "boring. Get Exploding Snap or something."

"I think that would have scared Harry to death if I whipped out magic cards. You should have seen his face at moving pictures!" Ron said.

Harry made to argue, but instead said, "...yeah, that's probably right."

"**Around half past twelve there was a great clattering outside in the corridor and a smiling, dimpled woman slid back their door and said, "Anything off the cart, dears?"**

**Harry, who hadn't had any breakfast, leapt to his feet, but Ron's ears went pink again and he muttered that he'd brought sandwiches."**

"If I know Ron – and I do – he can still eat a lot more than that," George commented.

"Yeah, the best bit of the train is the cart!" James proclaimed.

"So like Ron," Ginny muttered.

"**Harry went out into the corridor.**

**He had never had any money for sweets with the Dursleys,** **and now that he had pockets rattling with gold and silver he was ready to buy as many Mars Bars as he could carry**** –"**

"Mars bars?" Louis asked.

"Oh, they're amazing; chocolate, caramel and nougat!" Roxanne said energetically.

"How'd you know?" Molly eyed her cousin suspiciously.

"Muggle London is brilliant," she replied with no shame.

Molly waited for her Uncle George to reprimand Roxanne, but he didn't.

"— **but the woman didn't have Mars Bars.**

**What she did have were Bettie Bott's Every Flavour Beans,-"**

"Brilliant," James cheered.

"**-Drooble's Best Blowing Gum,-"**

"Wonderful!" Lucy beamed.

"**-Chocolate Frogs,-"**

Hugo wooped.

"**Pumpkin Pasties,-"**

Here Hermione had stopped, waiting for someone to claim them as their favourite. When no one did, Albus said, "They're pretty good, I suppose."

"**-Cauldron Cakes,-"**

"Yum!" Scorpius grinned.

"**-Liquorice Wands,-"**

"YEAH!" Freddie cheered.

"**-and a number of other strange things Harry had never seen in his life. Not wanting to miss anything, he got some of everything and paid the woman eleven silver Sickles and seven bronze Knuts.**

**Ron stared as Harry brought it all back in to the compartment and tipped it onto an empty seat.**

"**Hungry, are you?"**

"**Starving," said Harry, taking a large bite out of a pumpkin pasty.**

"He was a skinny little runt," Ron said, nodding.

"I wasn't a runt, Ron," Harry replied.

"You really were, mate," George added. "Still are."

James grinned. Just like dear little Al. "Like you, mate," he grinned, rubbing his brother's head.

"**Ron had taken out a lumpy package and unwrapped it. There were four sandwiches inside. He pulled one of them apart and said, "She always forgets I don't like corned beef…""**

"The idea of Grandma making something we don't like is just wrong," Lucy said.

"You haven't tried her corned beef sandwiches," Ron muttered.

""**Swap you for one of these," said Harry, holding up a pasty."Go on —""**

"He's offering Ron food. That's how they became friends."

Ron glared at Ginny.

""**You don't want this, it's all dry," said Ron. "She hasn't got much time," he added quickly, "you know, with five of us."**

"**Go on, have a pasty," said Harry, who had never had anything to share before or, indeed, anyone to share it with."**

"Very cute," grinned Teddy.

"**It was a nice feeling, sitting there with Ron, eating their way through all Harry's pasties, cakes, and candies (the sandwiches lay forgotten)."**

"Enjoyed it too, mate," Ron grinned.

""**What are these?" Harry asked Ron, holding up a pack of Chocolate Frogs.**

"**They're not**_**really**_**frogs, are they?" He was starting to feel that nothing would surprise him.**

"**No," said Ron. "But see what the card is. I'm missing Agrippa.""**

"I've got Agrippa!" Freddie shouted excitedly.

"So do I, now," Ron grinned.

""**What?"**

"**Oh, of course, you wouldn't know — Chocolate Frogs have cards, inside them, you know, to collect — famous witches and wizards. I've got about five hundred, but I haven't got Agrippa or Ptolemy.""**

"I've reached a thousand now," Rose grinned.

"That's because you've got a sad, sad life," James said.

"James!" Harry and Ginny cried.

"C'mon! All right, sorry Rosie-posy..."

"**Harry unwrapped his Chocolate Frog and picked up the card. It showed a man's face. He wore half-moon glasses, had a long, crooked nose, and flowing silver hair, beard, and moustache. Underneath the picture was the name Albus Dumbledore."**

"Oh, we'll get to see Dumbledore properly!" Lily said excitedly.

"Oh, well done Lily. That's smart." James rolled his eyes.

Lily crossed her arms huffily.

"James, will you be nice?" Ginny said, exasperated.

""**So**_**this**_**is Dumbledore!" said Harry.**

"**Don't tell me you'd never heard of Dumbledore!" said Ron. "Can I have a frog? I might get Agrippa — thanks —"**

**Harry turned over his card and read:**

_**ALBUS DUMBLEDORE**_

_**CURRENTLY HEADMASTER OF HOGWARTS"**_

"They've changed that," Roxanne said. "Now it says 'Ex-Headmaster', and how he was the only one MouldyWart ever feared."

"Yeah," James rolled his eyes, "because he's dead now."

"Oh, right," Roxanne blushed.

"_**Considered by many the greatest wizard of modern times, Dumbledore is particularly famous for his defeat of the dark wizard Grindelwald in 1945, for the discovery of the twelve uses of dragon's blood, and his work on alchemy with his partner, Nicolas Flamel. Professor Dumbledore enjoys chamber music and tenpin bowling."**_

"What's tenpin bowling?" Louis asked.

"It's a Muggle game, where you throw heavy balls at wooden – well, they're called pins, but they are wooden foot tall...things," Hermione trailed off, finding it hard to explain. Louis looked as confused as before.

"**Harry turned the card back over and saw, to his astonishment, that Dumbledore's face had disappeared."**

"What else would he have done?" James looked confused.

""**He's gone!"**

"**Well, you can't expect him to hang around all day," said Ron.**

"**He'll be back. No, I've got Morgana again and I've got about six of her… do you want it? You can start collecting."**

**Ron's eyes strayed to the pile of Chocolate Frogs waiting to be unwrapped. "Help yourself," said Harry. "But in, you know, the Muggle world, people just stay put in photos.""**

"But that's _boring_," Freddie interjected.

"There's not really that much they can do about it," Victoire reminded him.

""**Do they? What, they don't move at all?" Ron sounded amazed. "**_**Weird!"**_

**Harry stared as Dumbledore sidled back into the picture on his card and gave him a small smile."**

"He does sound quite nice," Lucy said thoughfully.

"What would you know? He's simply smiled at Harry, and left him dumped on a doorstep," Molly scorned.

"My instinct says so," Lucy said stubbornly.

"**Ron was more interested in eating the frogs-"**

"Of course," George interrupted.

"-**than looking at the Famous Witches and Wizards cards, but Harry couldn't keep his eyes off them. Soon he had not only Dumbledore and Morgana, but Hengist of Woodcroft, Alberic Grunnion, Circe, Paracelsus, and Merlin."**

"Do you know," Roxanne said, "there's a brilliant Muggle television programme about Merlin. Merlin in it is really cute."

"Does it stick to fact?" Rose looked interested.

"No. Well, he's magic, but his magic isn't as good as ours."

"Oh."

"Well. Back to Dad..." James said, pulling a face.

"**He finally tore his eyes away from the Druidess Cliodna, who was scratching her nose, to open a bag of Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Beans."**

"Ooh, watch out there, Harry," Teddy said.

"My worst was manure flavoured," Freddie offered.

Roxanne wrinkled her nose. "Ick."

""**You want to be careful with those," Ron warned Harry. "When they say every flavour, they**_**mean**_**every flavour — you know, you get all the ordinary ones like chocolate and peppermint and marmalade, but then you can get spinach and liver and tripe. George reckons he had a bogey-flavoured one once.""**

"I did," George nodded. Victoire and Lily too wrinkled their noses in disgust.

"**Ron picked up a green bean, looked at it carefully, and bit into a corner.**

"**Bleaaargh — see? Sprouts.""**

"I quite like sprouts," Louis said.

"Mate," James looked sideways at him, "that's weird."

Louis shrugged.

"**They had a good time eating the Every Flavour Beans. Harry got toast, coconut, baked bean, strawberry, curry, grass, coffee, sardine, and was even brave enough to nibble the end off a funny grey one Ron wouldn't touch, which turned out to be pepper."**

"True Gryffindor, that," James snorted.

"Oi!"

"Well, really, what could grey be?"

"I dunno. Dust? Death?"

"Ronald, they can't put _death_ in a Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Bean!"

"**The countryside now flying past the window was becoming wilder. The neat fields had gone. Now there were woods, twisting rivers, and dark green hills.**

**There was a knock on the door of their compartment and the round-faced boy Harry had passed on platform nine and three-quarters came in. He looked tearful.**

"**Sorry," he said, "but have you seen a toad at all?""**

"Why would you cry over losing a toad?" Roxanne said sceptically.

"Speak for yourself," Lucy argued, "I'd love a toad."

Roxanne looked unmoved.

"**When they shook their heads, he wailed, "I've lost him! He keeps getting away from me!"**

"**He'll turn up," said Harry."**

"Unfortunately," James muttered. Lucy shot him a glare.

""**Yes," said the boy miserably. "Well, if you see him…"**

**He left.**

"**Don't know why he's so bothered," said Ron. "If I'd brought a toad I'd lose it as quick as I could."**

"See, Uncle Ron agrees with me!" James said triumphantly.

"Yeah, but Ron also supports the Cannons," said Harry.

They all laughed, but for Ron and Rose, who both cried "Oi!"

"**Mind you, I brought Scabbers, so I can't talk."**

**The rat was still snoozing on Ron's lap."**

"What happened to Scabbers?" Hugo asked.

Harry, Ron and Hermione exchanged glances.

"You'll find out," Ron said with a dark look.

""**He might have died and you wouldn't know the difference," said Ron in disgust. "I tried to turn him yellow yesterday to make him more interesting, but the spell didn't work. I'll show you, look…""**

George let out a slight laugh. "You didn't," he said.

Ron glared at him.

"**He rummaged around in his trunk and pulled out a very battered-looking wand. It was chipped in places and something white was glinting at the end.**

"**Unicorn hair's nearly poking out. Anyway —"**

**He had just raised his wand when the compartment door slid open again. The toadless boy was back, but this time he had a girl with him. She was already wearing her new Hogwarts robes." **Here Hermione pulled a face, knowing that her young self was not very likable.

""**Has anyone seen a toad? Neville's lost one," she said. She had a bossy sort of voice, lots of bushy brown hair, and rather large front teeth. **Oh, thanks, Harry!" Hermione said crossly.

"Sorry," Harry had a sheepish expression.

Ron laughed outright.

""**We've already told him we haven't seen it," said Ron, but the girl wasn't listening, she was looking at the wand in his hand."**

Louis and James met each others eyes and both cracked up.

"Are you laughing at what I think you're laughing at?" Teddy said with a stony face.

George too grinned, and Dominique tried to hide her laughter.

"Exchange 'wand' for something," James sniggered.

Hermione blushed and Ron gained a stony expression.

Rose looked faintly disgusted, and Hugo apparently didn't get what they were saying. Probably for the better; he was only twelve.

""**Oh, are you doing magic? Let's see it, then."**

**She sat down. Ron looked taken aback.**

"**Er — all right."**

**He cleared his throat.**

"**Sunshine, daisies, butter mellow, Turn this stupid, fat rat yellow.""**

"That's not a spell," Molly cried.

"I know," Ron said, glaring at George, who smiled back. Ron relented and lost the glare, accepting that it was quite funny.

"**He waved his wand, but nothing happened. Scabbers stayed grey and fast asleep.**

"**Are you sure that's a real spell?" said the girl. "Well, it's not very good, is it?"**

"Charming, Mum!" Hugo laughed.

"Oh, shush. **I've tried a few simple spells just for practice and it's all worked for me. Nobody in my family's magic at all, it was ever such a surprise when I got my letter, but I was ever so pleased, of course, I mean, it's the very best school of witchcraft there is, I've heard — I've learned all our course books by heart,-"**

"Blimey, why?" Louis said weakly.

"**-of course, I just hope it will be enough-"**

"More than enough," Lucy laughed.

"— **I'm Hermione Granger, by the way, who are you?"**

**She said all this very fast.**

**Harry looked at Ron, and was relieved to see by his stunned face that he hadn't learned all the course books by heart either."**

"'Course he wouldn't," George snorted.

"You hadn't even read them when you went!"

"So?"

""**I'm Ron Weasley," Ron muttered.**

"**Harry Potter," said Harry.**

"**Are you really?" said Hermione.** "**I know all about you, of course — I got a few extra books, for background reading, and you're in**_**Modern Magical History**_**and**_**The Rise and Fall of the Dark Arts**_**and**_**Great Wizarding Events of the Twentieth Century**_**."**

"**Am I?" said Harry, feeling dazed. **Sorry, Harry, I was probably a bit much."

"A _bit_ much?" Ron said.

Hermione shot him an angry look, and he quietened.

"I didn't mind. It was a bit intimidating, but..."

"The man who defeated Voldemort was intimidated by Mum?" Hugo laughed.

"Your mother is scary," Harry said, grinning.

""**Goodness, didn't you know, I'd have found out everything I could if it was me," said Hermione. "Do either of you know what house you'll be in? I've been asking around, and I hope I'm in Gryffindor, it sounds by far the best;-"**

"Yeah, it is!" Louis, James and Freddie yelled.

"**I hear Dumbledore himself was in it, but I suppose Ravenclaw wouldn't be too bad…"**

"'Wouldn't be too bad?'" Dominique frowned. "Ravenclaw are brilliant."

"She's completely ignored Hufflepuff, anyway!" Lucy said, outraged. "And Slytherin! They're not all bad," she huffed.

"What do you care? You're in Gryffindor," Louis said.

"They should still get recognition as having merits," Lucy replied.

"Actually Lucy, now I agree with you. I was a bit narrow-minded when I was younger," Hermione explained.

"A bit?" Ron said.

Hermione glared at him. **""Anyway, we'd better go and look for Neville's toad. You two had better change, you know, I expect we'll be there soon."**

**And she left, taking the toadless boy with her.**

"**Whatever house I'm in, I hope she's not in it," said Ron."**

"Dad!" Rose looked shocked. Harry simply laughed and Ron kept a sheepish expression.

"Sorry, love," he offered to his wife.

"**He threw his wand back into his trunk. "Stupid spell — George gave it to me, bet he knew it was a dud.""**

"I did," George smiled. Teddy, James, Louis and the twins laughed.

""**What house are your brothers in?" asked Harry.**

"**Gryffindor," said Ron. Gloom seemed to be settling on him again."**

George frowned.

" **"Mum and Dad were in it, too. I don't know what they'll say if I'm not. I don't suppose Ravenclaw**_**would**_**be too bad, but imagine if they put me in Slytherin.""**

"We'd've disowned you," George nodded.

"You did that anyway, didn't you?" Harry asked.

"Well, yeah, me and Fred did. But who wouldn't? Look at him."

Ron scowled.

""**That's the house Vol-, I mean, You-Know-Who was in?"**

"**Yeah," said Ron. He flopped back into his seat, looking depressed.**

"**You know, I think the ends of Scabbers' whiskers are a bit lighter," said Harry, trying to take Ron's mind off houses."**

"Subtle, Dad," Albus said sarcastically.

""**So what do your oldest brothers do now that they've left, anyway?"**

**Harry was wondering what a wizard did once he'd finished school."**

"They can do anything!"

"**Charlie's in Romania studying dragons, and Bill's in Africa doing something for Gringotts," said Ron.**

"**Did you hear about Gringotts? It's been all over the**_**Daily Prophet**_**, but I don't suppose you get that with the Muggles — someone tried to rob a high security vault.""**

"Oh, do we find out who?" Rose asked her mother.

"Actually, I don't think we do," Hermione frowned.

"**Harry stared.**

"**Really? What happened to them?"**

"**Nothing, that's why it's such big news. They haven't been caught.** **My dad says it must've been a powerful Dark wizard to get round Gringotts,-"**

George and Ginny gave 'looks' to Harry, Ron and Hermione. All three smiled and shared guilty looks.

"**-but they don't think they took anything, that's what's odd. 'Course, everyone gets scared when something like this happens in case You-Know-Who's behind it."**

"And we all know how wrong they were," Harry joked.

"Mouldywart comes into this?" Freddie asked.

"_Mouldywart?_" Teddy looked at Freddie in bewilderment.

"Dad calls him that sometimes," he grinned.

"Let's just read and see," Hermione said. "**Harry turned this news over in his mind. He was starting to get a prickle of fear every time You-Know-Who was mentioned. He supposed this was all part of entering the magical world, but it had been a lot more comfortable saying "Voldemort" without worrying.** Which is, by the way, the way it should be," Hermione added.

"C'mon, Hermione. Took you years to say it," Harry pointed out.

"But I said it," she said defiantly.

""**What's your Quidditch team?" Ron asked.**

"**Er — I don't know any." Harry confessed."**

"Dad!" James looked disgusted at the second reminder that his father didn't know Quidditch until he was eleven.

""**What!" Ron looked dumbfounded."**

"As always," George added.

"Will you bloody shut up?" Ron cried.

"Nah."

"**"Oh, you wait, it's the best game in the world —""**

"He's right," James nodded.

"For once," Ginny grinned.

"And you!"

"**And he was off, explaining all about the four balls and the positions of the seven players, describing famous games he'd been to with his brothers and the broomstick he'd like to get if he had the money."**

"_Cascade_ is the best!" Louis said energetically.

"Oh, I so want one," Teddy agreed.

"_Firebolts_ all the way," said Harry.

"No way! They're ancient!" Dominique cried.

"Not as ancient as _Cleansweep Fives_, Dad," Roxanne rolled her eyes at her father.

"Hey, _Cleansweeps _do the job!"

"Woah, Uncle George, you've got a _Cleansweep Five?_ I thought Dad's _Eleven_ was old!" Hugo said, looking amazed.

Hermione read over them. She still didn't have strong emotions for Quidditch.** "He was just taking Harry through the finer points of the game when the compartment door slid open yet again, but it wasn't Neville the toadless boy, or Hermione Granger this time.** Hmpf," Hermione said.

"I love you now, Hermione..."

"**Three boys entered, and Harry recognized the middle one at once: it was the pale boy from Madam Malkin's robe shop."**

"Ahh." Scorpius wasn't looking forward to another mention of Draco Malfoy, the git extraordinaire.

"**He was looking at Harry with a lot more interest than he'd shown back in Diagon Alley.**

"**Is it true?" he said. "They're saying all down the train that Harry Potter's in this compartment. So it's you, is it?"**"

"Sucking up git," Hugo muttered.

""**Yes," said Harry. He was looking at the other boys. Both of them were thickset and looked extremely mean. Standing on either side of the pale boy, they looked like bodyguards."**

Crabbe's death struck Harry, Ron and Hermione again. Despite him being pretty horrendous, all three of them were slightly upset about his death. More than that.

""**Oh, this is Crabbe and this is Goyle," said the pale boy carelessly, noticing where Harry was looking. "And my name's Malfoy, Draco Malfoy."**

**Ron gave a slight cough, which might have been hiding a snigger."**

"It was," Ron nodded.

"**Draco Malfoy looked at him.**

"**Think my name's funny, do you? No need to ask who you are. My father told me all the Weasleys have red hair, freckles, and more children than they can afford.""**

There was a loud noise of outbursts from the younger generation, but the older ones knew to expect it.

"You can't say that! How _judgemental_, how absolutely rude!" Molly cried.

"Arrogant git," Lily offered, having narrowed her eyes.

"Arrogant prick, don't you mean?" James said.

"James!"

"Tosser," Freddie said.

"Freddie!"

"Moron?" Victoire said with a bit of a smile.

"No, Vic, get into the spirit," Teddy smiled at her, "stronger words? Like, prat or dickhead-"

"Oh, come on Teddy, will you at least try and be a good influence?" Ginny appeared to be losing her patience.

"Sorry, Ginny."

Harry tried to stay fairly neutral, for Malfoy had become nicer, and knew he'd been a bit of a prick, but it still niggled at that Weasley Love part of his mind. Like he wanted to hex Malfoy again.

George was being reminded of the time he'd punched Malfoy. A few times.

Scorpius was keeping rather quiet – not that he wasn't always pretty quiet. But, well, shit. Second introduction of his father and he was insulting the best family there was – if you included Potters into it, of course.

"**He turned back to Harry. "You'll soon find out some wizarding families are much better than others, Potter. You don't want to go making friends with the wrong sort. I can help you there.""**

"Oh, shut up," Lucy said.

"**He held out his hand to shake Harry's, but Harry didn't take it."**

"Good!" Louis and James cheered.

"**I think I can tell who the wrong sort are for myself, thanks," he said coolly."**

"Too right," James muttered. Ron smiled.

"**Draco Malfoy didn't go red, but a pink tinge appeared in his pale cheeks.**

"**I'd be careful if I were you, Potter," he said slowly. "Unless you're a bit politer you'll go the same way as your parents."**

"Scorpius," Rose looked aghast, "I'm sorry to say this, but your father was a complete prat!"

"Know that, thanks, Rose," Scorpius grimaced.

"**They didn't know what was good for them, either. You hang around with riffraff like the Weasleys and that Hagrid, and it'll rub off on you.""**

"Riffraff? Who the hell does he think he is?" James roared.

"Hagrid is _wonderful_!" Lucy cried.

"Weasleys are the best!" Freddie shouted.

"Nah, Potters are better, but that's besides the point," Albus said.

Harry intervened and tried to placate everyone. "Look, Draco Malfoy was an idiot back in school. And he still is a bit of an idiot, but less so now, so let's not yell at every annoying thing he does."

Scowls went around, but they generally listened to Harry.

"He was an utter twat," George said, with an ugly expression on his face.

Well, the kids listened to Harry.

"**Both Harry and Ron stood up.**

"**Say that again," Ron said, his face as red as his hair.**

"**Oh, you're going to fight us, are you?" Malfoy sneered.**

"**Unless you get out now," said Harry, more bravely than he felt, because Crabbe and Goyle were a lot bigger than him or Ron."**

"True Gryffindor!" James punched the air. Molly shook her head at him. "It's not only Gryffindors who would stand up for themselves."

James just shrugged it off.

""**But we don't feel like leaving, do we, boys? We've eaten all our food and you still seem to have some."**

**Goyle reached toward the Chocolate Frogs next to Ron — Ron leapt forward, but before he'd so much as touched Goyle, Goyle let out a horrible yell.**

**Scabbers the rat was hanging off his finger, sharp little teeth sunk deep into Goyle's knuckle** —"

"Brilliant!" Freddie added.

"-**Crabbe and Malfoy backed away as Goyle swung Scabbers round and round, howling, and when Scabbers finally flew off and hit the window,-"**

"Poor thing!" Lucy cried, and Lily looked shocked too. None of Harry, Ron and Hermione could feel any sympathy for Scabbers.

"**-all three of them disappeared at once. Perhaps they thought there were more rats lurking among the sweets, or perhaps they'd heard footsteps, because a second later, Hermione Granger had come in.**

"**What**_**has**_**been going on?" she said, looking at the sweets all over the floor and Ron picking up Scabbers by his tail.**

"**I think he's been knocked out," Ron said to Harry. He looked closer at Scabbers. "No — I don't believe it — he's gone back to sleep."**

**And so he had.**

"**You've met Malfoy before?""**

"Unfortunately," Louis added.

"**Harry explained about their meeting in Diagon Alley.**

"**I've heard of his family," said Ron darkly. "They were some of the first to come back to our side after You-Know-Who disappeared. Said they'd been bewitched. My dad doesn't believe it. He says Malfoy's father didn't need an excuse to go over to the Dark Side.""**

"I can see that," Scorpius muttered.

"**He turned to Hermione. "Can we help you with something?""**

"You could be more polite," Molly raised her eyebrow.

"Yes, that's your Uncle Ron. No tact," Hermione replied. "**You'd better hurry up and put your robes on, I've just been up to the front to ask the conductor, and he says we're nearly there. You haven't been fighting, have you? You'll be in trouble before we even get there!"**

"**Scabbers has been fighting, not us," said Ron, scowling at her. "Would you mind leaving while we change?""**

"I'm not sensing much romance brewing," Teddy said.

"It took a while," Hermione assured him.

""**All right — I only came in here because people outside are behaving very childishly, racing up and down the corridors," said Hermione in a sniffy voice.** A 'sniffy' voice? Thanks."

"Sorry."

""**And you've got dirt on your nose, by the way, did you know?"**

**Ron glared at her as she left. Harry peered out of the window. It was getting dark. He could see mountains and forests under a deep purple sky. The train did seem to be slowing down.**

**He and Ron took off their jackets and pulled on their long black robes. Ron's were a bit short for him, you could see his trainers underneath them."**

"They were Charlie's old ones," Ron said.

"Actually, they were mine for a bit after him," George added.

"They were too long for you though, surely?" Ron grinned.

"I'm taller than Harry."

"Not hard."

"Hey!"

"**A voice echoed through the train: "We will be reaching Hogwarts in five minutes' time. Please leave your luggage on the train, it will be taken to the school separately."**

**Harry's stomach lurched with nerves and Ron, he saw, looked pale under his freckles. They crammed their pockets with the last of the sweets and joined the crowd thronging the corridor.**

**The train slowed right down and finally stopped. People pushed their way toward the door and out on to a tiny, dark platform. Harry shivered in the cold night air. Then a lamp came bobbing over the heads of the students, and Harry heard a familiar voice: "Firs' years! Firs' years over here! All right there, Harry?""**

"Hagrid!" cheered Teddy, James, Lucy and George.

"**Hagrid's big hairy face beamed over the sea of heads.**

"**C'mon, follow me — any more firs' years? Mind yer step, now! Firs' years follow me!"**

**Slipping and stumbling, they followed Hagrid down what seemed to be a steep, narrow path. It was so dark on either side of them that Harry thought there must be thick trees there. Nobody spoke much. Neville, the boy who kept losing his toad, sniffed once or twice."**

"He sounds really sweet," Roxanne said with an adoring look.

"He's your teacher, Rox," Freddie reminded her.

"I know..."

""**Yeh'll get yer firs' sight o' Hogwarts in a sec," Hagrid called over his shoulder, "jus' round this bend here."**

**There was a loud "Oooooh!""**

Harry remembered the moment fondly, and as did George, Ron, Ginny and Hermione, and indeed each of the children. It was the most breathtaking moment they'd ever had in their lives so far.

Until, in George's case, the moment when he suddenly wasn't in the boast anymore.

"**The narrow path had opened suddenly onto the edge of a great black lake. Perched atop a high mountain on the other side, its windows sparkling in the starry sky, was a vast castle with many turrets and towers."**

"It is beautiful," Lucy nodded.

"It's fantastic," Scorpius grinned.

""**No more'n four to a boat!" Hagrid called, pointing to a fleet of little boats sitting in the water by the shore. Harry and Ron were followed into their boat by Neville and Hermione."**

"We tried to get five in," George said, "me, Fred, David Morrison, Ange and Karen Brocklehurst."

"What happened?" Teddy asked.

"We all fell in. Angelina swore then she'd never talk to us again. You can imagine her rage when we were all made Gryffindor."

""**Everyone in?" shouted Hagrid, who had a boat to himself. "Right then — FORWARD!"**

**And the fleet of little boats moved off all at once, gliding across the lake, which was as smooth as glass. Everyone was silent, staring up at the great castle overhead. It towered over them as they sailed nearer and nearer to the cliff on which it stood."**

Ginny grinned in excitement and suddenly looked like her daughter, and about the same age too. And the others had similar gleeful expressions; dreamy and wistful, nostalgic and euphoric.

""**Heads down!" yelled Hagrid** **as the first boats reached the cliff; they all bent their heads and the little boats carried them through a curtain of ivy that hid a wide opening in the cliff face. They were carried along a dark tunnel, which seemed to be taking them right underneath the castle, until they reached a kind of underground harbour, where they clambered out onto rocks and pebbles."**

"I slipped over and dragged a few others with me when I was getting out the boat," Teddy said, grinning. They all laughed.

"Would be you," said Ginny, shaking her head.

"**Oy, you there! Is this your toad?" said Hagrid, who was checking the boats as people climbed out of them.**

"**Trevor!" cried Neville blissfully, holding out his hands."**

"Bless," Roxanne grinned.

" **Then they clambered up a passageway in the rock after Hagrid's lamp, coming out at last onto smooth, damp grass right in the shadow of the castle.**

**They walked up a flight of stone steps and crowded around the huge, oak front door.**

"**Everyone here? You there, still got yer toad?"**

**Hagrid raised a gigantic fist and knocked three times on the castle door."**

"Hogwarts properly next!" James cheered.

"Is everyone okay to go on another chapter?" Hermione asked.

"Oh, stop worrying. They love it," Ron told her.


	7. Chapter 7: The Sorting Hat

**Sorry... Do tell me what you thought. Especially if you decided it wasn't worth the wait... . If you were waiting, at least. I'll get another one out soon. And after this book, I'm going to write the thing in advance and post regular, frequent updates.**

* * *

><p>In a manner which surprise everyone in the room (namely, enthusiastically), Ron picked up the book and began to read. "<strong>Chapter Seven: <strong>**The Sorting Hat.**

**The door swung open at once. A tall, black-haired witch in emerald-green robes stood there.**

**She had a very stern face and Harry's first thought was that this was not someone to cross."**

"Very astute, Potter," George grinned.

"**"****The firs' years, Professor McGonagall," said Hagrid."**

"McGonagall? But she's headmistress!" Freddie protested.

Molly, in a very patronising manner, turned to face her little cousin and reminded him that _Professor_ McGonagall was of course a head of year before a headmistress, and an ordinary teacher before that, and it didn't take an idiot to work it out.

George here rather wanted to cut in to defend his son from his elder cousin, but Roxanne was quicker (and it was probably more acceptable for her to get outraged, rather than someone over double Molly's age).

"_Awfully_ sorry about that, Molly. Sorry we don't know _everything,_" Roxanne said, a slight sneer in her voice.

And before anyone else could say anything – Molly looked ready to argue, and Ginny really disliked that sneer on Roxanne's face – Ginny said sharply, "Kids! Come on."

Molly's lips tightened at being called a kid, but she relented.

"**"****Thank you, Hagrid. I will take them from here."" **Ron read hastily. "**She pulled the door wide. The entrance hall was so big you could have fit the whole of the Dursleys' house in it."**

"Well, it DOES house and school three hundred or so children, and about twenty adults," Dominique pointed out.

"**The stone walls were lit with flaming torches like the ones at Gringotts, the ceiling was too high to make out,-"**

"It's enchanted, so it'd be like the night sky," Hugo said proudly.

"We know, Hu... we've all been there," Lily rolled her eyes at her cousin, who grinned back at her. Hermione beamed with pride.

"-** and a magnificent marble staircase facing them led to the upper floors.**

**They followed Professor McGonagall across the flagged stone floor. Harry could hear the drone of hundreds of voices from a doorway to the right — the rest of the school must already be here —"**

"Yup," George said, "we're in there earlier, all ready to intimidate you poor sods."

"You were one of those 'poor sods' once," Ron grumbled.

"It wasn't that bad," Teddy shrugged. Although, Teddy was the first of the next generation off to Hogwarts. He didn't have elder brothers watching and laughing – well, Teddy didn't have elder brothers full stop, or younger, or sisters, and he supposed he did rather show off when Victoire was one of the firsties; he'd winked at her, made his hair flash through the colours of the rainbow, and laugh extraordinarily loudly at something that wasn't even funny. And he was quite sure Vic had looked even more anxious when she saw how settled Teddy was, and how popular.

"You didn't have loads of relatives watching you," Lucy said.

"Yeah, I just realised," said Teddy, slightly sheepishly.

"**- but Professor McGonagall showed the first years into a small, empty chamber off the hall. They crowded in, standing rather closer together than they would usually have done, peering about nervously."**

"Nawwh, terrified ickle firsties," James said, slightly maliciously, and Ginny and Harry both eyed their son suspiciously.

"James, don't antagonize first years."

"He _always_ does," Rose scowled. There'd been awful stories about sorting for her and Albus, not to mention endless ribbing about being outcast from the family by whichever house they ended up in. And then the stories about the ghosts to all of the first years – how the Bloody Baron was called that because he loved blood, and so if ever you bled, he'd find you and suck it all up and you'd end up in the hospital wing for weeks.

And he'd managed to keep Hugo up all night for the first week, talking about how the House Elves thought spiders weren't appreciated nearly enough, so at night they'd come in and place all the spiders they could find into the first year's beds.

Lily was similarly treated, but she'd chosen to be the brave one, and would sneak into Rose's room at night occasionally until Rose had gotten James to swear he was lying.

James had tried it with Freddie and Roxanne, but (much to their mother's chagrin) George had told them so much that what James had to offer wasn't at all scary in comparison.

"**"****Welcome to Hogwarts," said Professor McGonagall.**

Ron paused. Every single one of the room's occupants remembered these words being said to them; their young, eleven year old selves being entranced by the brilliance of the place, no matter how they might have seen it already from memorial services, or heard about it from siblings and parents.

"**"The start-of-term banquet will begin shortly,-"**

"Best meal ever," Hugo grinned.

"-** but before you take your seats in the Great Hall, you will be sorted into your houses. The Sorting is a very important ceremony because, while you are here, your house will be something like your family within Hogwarts."**

"Or, in your case, actually is your family," Scorpius remarked dryly. They all laughed appreciatively. It was true, really, given that all of them were in Gryffindor. Of course, they all had friends from various Houses, but something in each of the Weasleys and Potters made them Gryffindor, if only just. And Teddy and Scorpius joined them, of course.

""**You will have classes with the rest of your house, sleep in your house dormitory, and spend free time in your house common room.**

**"****The four houses are called Gryffindor," **and they all cheered here, if a little half-heartedly in some cases.

"**Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and Slytherin. Each house has its own noble history and each has produced outstanding witches and wizards."**

"If some more than others," James hastened to add.

"All houses have great witches and wizards, James," Harry told him.

"Yeah, but Gryffindor has the best."

"One of the greatest men I ever knew-"

"Was a Slytherin, we _know_, Dad!" Albus said, exasperated.

"Severus Snape was a great man!" Harry insisted.

"But Gryffindor has the _most_ great wizards and witches!" James cried, his voice rising.

Victoire now joined the argument. "It's depends how you define 'great'. Ravenclaw house has possibly done the best for the magical development."

"And," Molly added, "Slytherin possibly did the greatest work for the magical community."

"What? -"

"He was a slimeball!-"

"He was evil-"

"You ought to be in bloody Slytherin!-"

"Who's side are you –"

"What are you on about?-"

"Oi!" Teddy yelled, and won silence.

"Well," Molly said, sounding irritated, "you can't argue that without Slytherin, wizards and witches may well have all been killed off by Muggles!"

"Muggles are brilliant!" James roared.

Another voice joined. "She isn't saying they're not!"

"Lucy, James and Molly!" Hermione shouted. As it quietened, she said, "Molly's right, and she's not saying anything bad about Muggles, it just so happens time was like that."

James set his jaw, angry how he was being treated as a child, and Molly's nostrils flared for the same reason.

Ron began to read again, albeit slightly hesitantly. "**While you are at Hogwarts, your triumphs will earn your house points, while any rule breaking will lose house points.**

**At the end of the year, the house with the most points is awarded the house cup, a great honour. I hope each of you will be a credit to whichever house becomes yours."**

Louis scoffed. "He's Harry Potter, of course he'll be a credit."

"**"****The Sorting Ceremony will take place in a few minutes in front of the rest of the school. I suggest you all smarten yourselves up as much as you can while you are waiting."**

**Her eyes lingered for a moment on Neville's cloak, which was fastened under his left ear,"**

"Nice move, Professor," Freddie laughed.

"Bless him," Ginny said fondly.

"**-and on-" **Ron scowled as he read, "-**Ron's smudged nose."**

"Nice move, Ronnie," George snorted.

"Oh, shut up. **Harry nervously tried to flatten his hair."**

James let out an exaggerated laugh. "Oh, Dad, as if that would work."

Harry shrugged. "I was young and idealistic."

"**"****I shall return when we are ready for you," said Professor McGonagall. "Please wait quietly."**

**She left the chamber. Harry swallowed.**

**"****How exactly do they sort us into houses?" he asked Ron.**

**"****Some sort of test, I think. Fred said it hurts a lot, but I think he was joking.""**

"You think?" Ginny raised an eyebrow at Ron, who blushed.

"They spent weeks going on about it..." he mumbled.

Albus nodded. "James did the same thing for us," he gestured to all those younger than himself.

James frowned. "It wasn't just me! Louis joined in, and Albus after he'd done it. AND Uncle George!"

"George, did you have to?" Hermione looked at him despairingly.

George, getting defensive, replied, "I had to make sure they upheld the tradition!"

"And Albus, really? And Louis, you're the youngest, surely you'd know what it felt like?"

"It was- well-" Albus mumbled.

"Funny," Louis nodded.

"Come on, Hermione, no harm done. And it is tradition," said Ginny.

"They're only little!"

"We're not that young, Mum!"

"**Harry's heart gave a horrible jolt. A test? In front of the whole school? But he didn't know any magic yet —what on earth would he have to do? He hadn't expected something like this the moment they arrived."**

"Oh, bless, Uncle Harry, it's all fine," Roxanne laughed.

Harry chuckled too, "Thanks Roxanne. I just think it's easier when coming from a magical family."

"Not if they make up stories about the sorting," Ron muttered. George winked at him with a mean grin.

"**He looked around anxiously and saw that everyone else looked terrified, too."**

"'Course, they'll all in the same boat," Teddy said. He paused, and said, "at least, not literally. Else that would be a wet journey across the lake."

Louis, Lucy and Roxanne all laughed, but James and Dominique groaned at the joke.

" **No one was talking much except Hermione Granger, who was whispering very fast about all the spells she'd learned and wondering which one she'd need."**

Hermione blushed a bit.

"**Harry tried hard not to listen to her."**

"And still does to this day," Ron added.

"Oh, very mature," Hermione said, but she was smiling.

"**He'd never been more nervous, never, not even when he'd had to take a school report home to the Dursleys saying that he'd somehow turned his teacher's wig blue.****"**

"Blue? Brilliant!" Louis laughed.

Ron grinned at Harry. "Mate, why didn't you do that to Umbridge?"

"I didn't mean to do it!" Harry protested, but he was also grinning.

"Accidental magic always has a reason, Uncle Harry," Victoire pointed out, a slightly mischievous smile on her face.

"All right, I was a little annoyed with her, but I didn't mean to turn it blue!"

"Like how you 'Inever _meant_ to blow her up'," Hermione teased.

"You blew someone up?" Freddie's eyes widened.

"No! I just... inflated her, slightly."

Ron threw his head back and laughed.

Harry couldn't disguise his chuckles. "It'll come up, you can all laugh then."

"Oh, we will," promised George.

"**He kept his eyes fixed on the door. Any second now, Professor McGonagall would come back and lead him to his doom."**

Ginny raised an eyebrow. "Bit dramatic, possibly?"

"Maybe a little..."

"**Then something happened that made him jump about a foot in the air — several people behind him screamed.**

**"****What the —?"**

**He gasped. So did the people around him. About twenty ghosts had just streamed through the back wall."**

"Oh, they're not scary!" James waved his hand, looking completely unimpressed.

Hugo glared at James. "They're not _now," _he said sullenly.

"C'mon Hugo, it was a joke!"

Hermione bristled. "What joke did you play on my son, James?"

"It was nothing! A harmless joke! Like what Uncle Fred did to Uncle Ron!"

"Even that half traumatised the poor kid," George added.

"I'm not bloody traumatised!"

"Ron!"

"Hey, that's barely even a swear word! Merlin's balls. **Pearly-white and slightly transparent, they glided across the room talking to one another and hardly glancing at the first years. They seemed to be arguing.**

**What looked like a fat little monk was saying: "Forgive and forget, I say, we ought to give him a second chance —""**

"Oh, not this argument _again,_" Teddy rolled his eyes. "Every month they have this argument!"

"They still have it," Lily said. "I quite like them giving him more chances. He likes us," she gestured to her fellow nearly-second years.

All five of the adults had a shrewd idea as to why Peeves might like them. It wasn't even that shrewd, it was quite obvious, really. "Give her hell from us, Peeves!" remained the only instruction from a student Peeves had ever taken.

"**"****My dear Friar, haven't we given Peeves all the chances he deserves? He gives us all a bad name and you know, he's not really even a ghost-"**

"He's better than a ghost, really," George said fairly.

"He keeps dropping ink on my head," Scorpius scowled.

Albus snorted. "Yeah, makes you look like a Dalmatian."

Scorpius scowled harder.

" — **I say, what are you all doing here?"**

**A ghost wearing a ruff and tights had suddenly noticed the first years.**

**Nobody answered."**

"He sees them every year, how could he not know?" Rose looked baffled.

"If you're a ghost, I s'pose time must be a bit more vague, so they'd lose track of it," Lucy wondered.

"I think you're probably right, Luce," Teddy said, toying with Victoire's hair again. He seemed to have lost the awkwardness from having adults in the room. Lucy beamed at Teddy's comment.

"**"****New students!" said the Fat Friar, smiling around at them. "About to be Sorted, I suppose?"**

**A few people nodded mutely."**

"They're not scary," James scoffed.

Hugo scowled again. "Are a bit," he muttered.

"**"****Hope to see you in Hufflepuff!" said the Friar. "My old house, you know."**

**"****Move along now," said a sharp voice. "The Sorting Ceremony's about to start.""**

Ginny groaned. "Do we really have to listen to this?"

Ron's head shot up, "Oi! This is my sorting!"

"And we all know what happens..."

"**Professor McGonagall had returned. One by one, the ghosts floated away through the opposite wall.**

**"****Now, form a line," Professor McGonagall told the first years, "and follow me."**

**Feeling oddly as though his legs had turned to lead,-"**

"Standard," Albus said quietly. Scorpius smiled.

"**-Harry got into line behind a boy with sandy hair****with Ron behind him, and they walked out of the chamber, back across the hall, and through a pair of double doors into the Great Hall.****" **Ron stopped, and smiled. "**Harry had never even imagined such a strange and splendid place." **

Again, no one interrupted, but Ron was quiet for a few moments and all of them remembered the first time they saw the Great Hall.

"**It was lit by thousands and thousands of candles that were floating in midair over four long tables, where the rest of the students were sitting. These tables were laid with glittering golden plates and goblets. At the top of the hall was another long table where the teachers were sitting. Professor McGonagall led the first years up here, so that they came to a halt in a line facing the other students, with the teachers behind them. The hundreds of faces staring at them looked like pale lanterns in the flickering candlelight. Dotted here and there among the students, the ghosts shone misty silver."**

Merlin, seeing that place for the first time was magnificent. Hermione remembered the wonderment she'd had at it, even though she'd read _Hogwarts: A History_ plenty of times in that year between turning eleven and going to Hogwarts and so knew what to expect. It had seemed like a fairy tale – coming into a castle straight out of her dreams.

"**Mainly to avoid all the staring eyes, Harry looked upward and saw a velvety black ceiling dotted with stars. He heard Hermione whisper, "It's bewitched to look like the sky outside. I read about it in**_**Hogwarts: A History**_**.""**

Albus pulled a face, "That's exactly what Rose said."

"**It was hard to believe there was a ceiling there at all, and that the Great Hall didn't simply open on to the heavens."**

"That would be a bit stupid. It's always raining in Scotland," George remarked.

"Okay," and the colour raised slightly in Harry's cheeks, "I'm sure if we listened to your eleven-year-old thoughts, there'd be some pretty stupid things there too."

"Ahh, but Potter, we're not, are we?" George grinned at Harry.

"**Harry quickly looked down again as Professor McGonagall silently placed a four-legged stool in front of the first years. On top of the stool she put a pointed wizard's hat. This hat was patched and frayed and extremely dirty. Aunt Petunia wouldn't have let it in the house.**

_**Maybe they had to try and get a rabbit out of it**_**, Harry thought wildly,-"**

They all laughed.

"I wish you'd tried that," Ron chortled.

"I'm glad I didn't," replied Harry, through a determinedly straight face.

"-**that seemed the sort of thing**** —****noticing that everyone in the hall was now staring at the hat, he stared at it, too."**

"Yeah, no one knows why there's a hat there, first time you see it," George said whilst nodding. He'd had Charlie and Bill talking about how they'd have to ride a bucking Hippogriff. He and Fred had completely believed it, for even their parents were nodding, and Percy – Perfect Percy! – had nodded earnestly.

"**For a few seconds, there was complete silence. Then the hat twitched. A rip near the brim opened wide like a mouth — and the hat began to sing.' **I'm not singing."

Most of them complained loudly at this, but Rose and Hugo seemed very glad.

**"**_**Oh, you may not think I'm pretty,**_

_**But don't judge on what you see,**_

_**I'll eat myself if you can find**_

_**A smarter hat than me.**_

_**You can keep your bowlers black,**_

_**Your top hats sleek and tall,**_

_**For I'm the Hogwarts Sorting Hat**_

_**And I can cap them all.**_

_**There's nothing hidden in your head**_

_**The Sorting Hat can't see,**_

_**So try me on and I will tell you**_

_**Where you ought to be.**_

_**You might belong in Gryffindor,**_

_**Where dwell the brave at heart,**_

_**Their daring, nerve, and chivalry**_

_**Set Gryffindors apart;**_

_**You might belong in Hufflepuff,**_

_**Where they are just and loyal,**_

_**Those patient Hufflepuffs are true**_

_**And unafraid of toil;**_

_**Or yet in wise old Ravenclaw,**_

_**If you've a ready mind,**_

_**Where those of wit and learning,**_

_**Will always find their kind;**_

_**Or perhaps in Slytherin**_

_**You'll make your real friends,**_

_**Those cunning folk use any means**_

_**To achieve their ends.**_

_**So put me on! Don't be afraid!**_

_**And don't get in a flap!**_

_**You're in safe hands (though I have none)**_

_**For I'm a Thinking Cap!"**_

"That's not the song it sang with us," Roxanne frowned.

"No," Teddy nodded, "It sings a different song every year."

Freddie frowned. "So it spends a whole year thinking up a song? That sounds bloody boring."

"Yeah, that's what I said," Ron smiled, **"The whole hall burst into applause as the hat finished its song. It bowed to each of the four tables and then became quite still again.**

**"****So we've just got to try on the hat!" Ron whispered to Harry. "I'll k-'** Erm," Ron hesitated. He cleared his throat quickly and shot a nervous glance at George, and continued, '**"I'll kill Fred, he was going on about wrestling a troll.""** Ron did notice George's wince at that. He felt a bit uncomfortable, really.

"**Harry smiled weakly. Yes, trying on the hat was a lot better than having to do a spell, but he did wish they could have tried it on without everyone watching."**

"Just a hat, Harry," Ginny smiled.

"**The hat seemed to be asking rather a lot; Harry didn't feel brave or quick-witted or any of it at the moment."**

"No one does. It's quite hard to feel anything other than fear, I'm guessing," Hermione said in a reassuring tone. Harry didn't even reply; he felt like he needed a sign saying "I'm 39 years old!"

"**If only the hat had mentioned a house for people who felt a bit queasy, that would have been the one for him.' **And me, don't worry, mate."

Hermione nodded, "I was definitely feeling very sick."

"And me."

"Yeah, I was."

"All right, I suppose I was a _bit_ nervous."

"You moron James, I was right next to you, you were shaking!"

"I was _shivering_ with the _cold."_

"I was really scared."

"I actually threw up on the train."

"Ew."

"**Professor McGonagall now stepped forward holding a long roll of parchment.**

**"****When I call your name, you will put on the hat and sit on the stool to be sorted," she said. "Abbott, Hannah!""**

"That's Neville's wife," Harry informed the children.

"Hannah!" cried Roxanne and Freddie; living in Diagon Alley had gotten them very close with the Longbottoms. Although, the Potters and Hermione and Ron's children all knew her well too, proved by their cries of "Hannah!" and "Hannah!" from Teddy and James.

"**A pink-faced girl with blonde pigtails stumbled out of line, put on the hat, which fell right down over her eyes, and sat down. A moments pause —**

**"****HUFFLEPUFF!" shouted the hat.**

**The table on the right cheered and clapped as Hannah went to sit down at the Hufflepuff table. Harry saw the ghost of the Fat Friar waving merrily at her."**

"I think the Friar might be my favourite ghost," Lucy smiled.

"No way! Peeves all the way!" Freddie cried.

"Peeves is a poltergeist, not a ghost, so he shouldn't really be in this," Albus pointed out.

"But he is the best," added George.

Harry shrugged, "I still like Nick. He's a good bloke – uh, ghost."

"**"****Bones, Susan!"**

**"****HUFFLEPUFF!" shouted the hat again, and Susan scuttled off to sit next to Hannah.**

**"****Boot, Terry!"**

**"****RAVENCLAW!"**

**The table second from the left clapped this time; several Ravenclaws stood up to shake hands with Terry as he joined them.**

**"****Brocklehurst, Mandy" went to Ravenclaw too, but "Brown, Lavender"****became the first new Gryffindor,-"**

"WOO!" James, Louis, Freddie and Hugo cheered.

"**-and the table on the far left exploded with cheers; Harry could see Ron's twin brothers catcalling."**

"Sorry, Won-Won, didn't mean to, uh 'step on your turf'," George said with a wink.

"Shut it," Ron said through gritted teeth. Harry and Ginny shared amused glances and giggles and even Hermione was chuckling.

"'**Bulstrode, Millicent" then became a Slytherin.**

**Perhaps it was Harry's imagination, after all he'd heard about Slytherin, but he thought they looked like an unpleasant lot."**

"They are."

"James! There is nothing wrong with Slytherin house!"

"**He was starting to feel definitely sick now. He remembered being picked for teams during P.E at his old school. He had always been last to be chosen, not because he was no good, but because no one wanted Dudley to think they liked him."**

Ron paused again and an awkwardness filled the room. Harry began to feel very uncomfortable, rubbing his neck slightly – as a father, he was supposed to show that he was once cool, damn it!

"**"****Finch-Fletchley, Justin!"**

**"****HUFFLEPUFF!"**

**Sometimes, Harry noticed, the hat shouted out the house at once, but at others it took a little while to decide. "Finnigan, Seamus,"****the sandy-haired boy next to Harry in the line, sat on the stool for almost a whole minute before the hat declared him a Gryffindor.**

**"****Granger, Hermione!""**

They all yelled out, cheering for Hermione, who blushed.

"**Hermione almost ran to the stool and jammed the hat eagerly on her head."**

"Oh, Merlin..." she blushed even more.

"Always eager," Ron smiled at her.

"**"****GRYFFINDOR!" shouted the hat. Ron groaned." **

"Dad!"

The adult Ron looked sheepishly at his wife and mumbled an apology.

"**A horrible thought struck Harry, as horrible thoughts always do when you're very nervous.**

**What if he wasn't chosen at all?**

**What if he just sat there with the hat over his eyes for ages, until Professor McGonagall jerked it off his head and said there had obviously been a mistake and he'd better get back on the train?" **

"Oh, as if," Ginny laughed.

"**When Neville Longbottom, the boy who kept losing his toad, was called, he fell over on his way to the stool.**

**The hat took a long time to decide with Neville."**

"It was trying to persuade him he was good enough for Gryffindor," Ginny informed the group.

"What, Neville not being brave enough?" James raised an eyebrow.

"He just didn't think he was, poor thing," Hermione said. "He argued that he was right for Hufflepuff."

"How do you know?" Ron asked with great interest.

"I talk to Neville, you know. I was his good friend in Hogwarts," Hermione reminded Ron.

Ginny, with ever-so-slightly pinked cheeks, said, "And I talked to him a lot, with that year in Hogwarts and going to the Yule Ball with him."

Lily looked at her mother with an expression similar to Ron's. "You went to the ball with Neville?"

"Well," Ginny found herself inexplicably getting defensive, "I was too young to have gone without being asked, and he is really nice."

"And he has rather natty cardigans," George said.

"**When it finally shouted, "GRYFFINDOR," Neville ran off still wearing it, and had to jog back amid gales of laughter to give it to "MacDougal, Morag."**

**Malfoy swaggered forward when his name was called and got his wish at once: the hat had barely touched his head when it screamed, "SLYTHERIN!""**

Scorpius stiffened up a bit. He didn't like how his father was swaggering and didn't like how arrogant he was, and even more just didn't like this father he had.

"**Malfoy went to join his friends Crabbe and Goyle, looking pleased with himself.**

**There weren't many people left now. "Moon"…, "Nott"… , "Parkinson"… , then a pair of twin girls, "Patil" and "Patil"… , then "Perks, Sally-Anne"… , and then, at last —**

**"****Potter, Harry!"**

**As Harry stepped forward, whispers suddenly broke out like little hissing fires all over the hall.**

**"**_**Potter**_**, did she say?"**

**"**_**The**_**Harry Potter?"**

**The last thing Harry saw before the hat dropped over his eyes was the hall full of people craning to get a good look at him."**

"That would be weird, " Lucy commented. James, Albus and Lily didn't comment – people did that to them, to some extent. It wasn't weird, just a bit annoying, having such famous parents. Even Rose and Hugo suffered it, and Roxanne and Freddie (given their father was famously the owner of _Wheezes_, which was ridiculously popular in Hogwarts)

" **Next second he was looking at the black inside of the hat. He waited.**

**"****Hmm," said a small voice in his ear. "Difficult. Very difficult."**

"Not _that_ difficult," James frowned. Many of the occupants wanted to agree with him; Harry was very much Gryffindor. Harry however, cringed slightly at the comment. Brilliant, so they'd all know how nearly he was in Slytherin. _Although_, a defiant and righteous part of him protested, _it'd be good for them to remember that Slytherin has its merits, and that Gryffindor isn't the only house the family could go into. _

"**Plenty of courage, I see. Not a bad mind either. There's talent, A my goodness, yes — and a nice thirst to prove yourself, now that's interesting… So where shall I put you?"**

**Harry gripped the edges of the stool and thought,**_**Not Slytherin, not Slytherin**_**.**

**"****Not Slytherin, eh?" said the small voice. "Are you sure? You could be great, you know, it's all here in your head, and Slytherin will help you on the way to greatness, no doubt about that — no?"**

James, Ron, Lily, Ginny, Hugo and Dominique all stared at the book, not expecting this at all. The rest of them, however, felt either less surprised than they thought they should have, or relieved that they weren't alone in almost being put in a different house.

Teddy had very nearly been a Hufflepuff; with Hermione the Hat wasn't sure at all between Gryffindor and Ravenclaw; the Hat had suggested that maybe Freddie would do well in Hufflepuff before he persuaded it that he was bloody lazy; Roxanne's ambition had meant she was almost a Slytherin; Molly and Lucy were both nearly in Ravenclaw; the Hat thought that George would benefit from being a Ravenclaw, but then his refusal to go in a different house to Fred had made it (jokingly) suggest Hufflepuff.

"**Well, if you're sure — better be GRYFFINDOR!""**

And, as before, there were many hoots and cheers.

"**Harry heard the hat shout the last word to the whole hall. He took off the hat and walked shakily toward the Gryffindor table. He was so relieved to have been chosen and not put in Slytherin,-" **and here, Ron pulled a face as he imagined his best friend being a Slytherin. Hermione noticed his face and lightly slapped his shoulder. "Sorry, but it'd be weird! -**he hardly noticed that he was getting the loudest cheer yet. Percy the Prefect got up and shook his hand vigorously, while the Weasley twins yelled, "We got Potter! We got Potter!"**

**Harry sat down opposite the ghost in the ruff he'd seen earlier. The ghost patted his arm, giving Harry the sudden, horrible feeling he'd just plunged it into a bucket of ice-cold water."**

"Was an unpleasant shock, I can tell you," Harry smiled as he remembered.

"Me too, it's not like we ever touched our ghoul," Ron pointed out. Unless they were trying to dress it, he mentally added. It seemed George was thinking the same thing, for they caught each other's eyes and shared a smile.

"**He could see the High Table properly now. At the end nearest him sat Hagrid, who caught his eye and gave him the thumbs up. Harry grinned back. And there, in the centre of the High Table, in a large gold chair, sat Albus Dumbledore." **And again, Ron paused, and all those who'd known the man thought of him. For Harry, Ron and Hermione, they all remembered that very banquet where they'd first seen the man. For George, it was the same only two years earlier, and he was sure the man had winked at him when he pretended to be Fred during the Sorting. For Ginny, it was a year after Ron's, of course. And she was rightly amazed by the man.

"**Harry recognized him at once from the card he'd gotten out of the Chocolate Frog on the train. Dumbledore's silver hair was the only thing in the whole hall that shone as brightly as the ghosts."**

"I think the beard shone just as well," Ginny added.

Harry laughed. "Yes, that's certainly true."

"**Harry spotted Professor Quirrell, too, the nervous young man from the Leaky Cauldron. He was looking very peculiar in a large purple turban." **Harry, Ron, Hermione and George all frowned, knowing exactly what was under that turban, but said no more.

**And now there were only three people left to be sorted. *****"****Turpin, Lisa," became a Ravenclaw and then it was Ron's turn. He was pale green by now."**

"Bless," George leaned over and ruffled Ron's hair.

"Get off! **Harry crossed his fingers under the table- **thanks mate -** and a second later the hat had shouted, "GRYFFINDOR!"**

**Harry clapped loudly with the rest as Ron collapsed into the chair next to him.**

**"****Well done, Ron, excellent," said Percy Weasley pompously across Harry-" **both Lucy and Molly pulled faces as their father was described not so kindly again, "-**as "Zabini, Blaise," was made a Slytherin. Professor McGonagall rolled up her scroll and took the Sorting Hat away.**

**Harry looked down at his empty gold plate. He had only just realised how hungry he was. The pumpkin pasties seemed ages ago."**

James rubbed his stomach, "Yeah, so does our lunch," he commented. Victoire and Ginny both rolled their eyes.

"**Albus Dumbledore had gotten to his feet. He was beaming at the students, his arms opened wide, as if nothing could have pleased him more than to see them all there." **And as they fondly remembered the man, none of them doubted that this was true.

"**"****Welcome," he said. "Welcome to a new year at Hogwarts! Before we begin our banquet, I would like to say a few words. And here they are: Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!**

**"****Thank you!""**

The younger generation all laughed, slightly bewildered by this man but more than appreciative of him.

"**He sat back down. Everybody clapped and cheered. Harry didn't know whether to laugh or not."**

"Do it," James said immediately. Freddie nodded, still chortling.

"**"****Is he — a bit mad?" he asked Percy uncertainly.**

**"****Mad?" said Percy airily. "He's a genius! Best wizard in the world! But he is a bit mad, yes. Potatoes, Harry?"**

**Harry's mouth fell open.**

**The dishes in front of him were now piled with food. He had never seen so many things he liked to eat on one table: roast beef, roast chicken, pork chops and lamb chops, sausages, bacon and steak, boiled potatoes, roast potatoes, chips, Yorkshire pudding, peas, carrots, gravy, ketchup, and, for some strange reason, mint humbugs."**

"I miss Hogwarts feasts," Hugo said mournfully.

Rose looked unimpressed. "That's all you miss from it?"

"But they're so good..."

"**The Dursleys had never exactly starved Harry, but he'd never been allowed to eat as much as he liked."**

They all frowned. Hermione looked like she very much wanted to say something, but, Harry was relieved to notice, she refrained, probably because of the children in the room. Ginny grabbed Harry's hand and she and Lily both glared at the book.

"**Dudley had always taken anything that Harry really wanted, even if it made him sick."**

"What a pig," Dom scowled.

"He's all right now," Harry reminded them.

"Dad," Albus began hesitantly, "but being all right as an adult can't really make up for being a prat as a kid, right?"

"I'm not angry at Dudley," Harry said firmly. He caught George's eye, and added, "Besides, he got what he deserved."

"What do you mean?" Louis asked, interested.

"You'll see," Harry smiled.

"**Harry piled his plate with a bit of everything except the humbugs and began to eat. It was all delicious.**

**"****That does look good," said the ghost in the ruff sadly, watching Harry cut up his steak.**

**"****Can't you —?""**

Hermione shook her head. "Really, Harry, how on Earth could a ghost eat?"

"We saw, remember?" Ron reminded her. Hermione shook her head again, "No, we saw their attempts, and they even said they didn't work."

"Well, what was the point of having rotting food then?"

"Please shut up," George interrupted them before it turned into a proper bickering.

**"****I haven't eaten for nearly five hundred years," said the ghost. "I don't need to, of course, but one does miss it.****I don't think I've introduced myself? Sir Nicholas de Mimsy-Porpington at your service."**

"Hey, it's Nearly Headless Nick!" Freddie exclaimed, jumping in his seat. "That neck this is _so cool_."

"It's gross, don't you mean?" Roxanne argued.

"No, it's brilliant!"

"**Resident ghost of Gryffindor Tower."**

**"****I know who you are!" said Ron suddenly. "My brothers told me about you — you're Nearly Headless Nick!"**

**"****I would**_**prefer**_**you to call me Sir Nicholas de Mimsy —" the ghost began stiffly, but sandy-haired Seamus Finnigan interrupted.**

**"**_**Nearly**_**Headless? How can you be**_**nearly**_**headless?"" **

"It was me who asked it," Freddie said proudly.

Lily had an expression of mild disgust. "I wish you hadn't," she said.

"**Sir Nicholas looked extremely miffed, as if their little chat wasn't going at all the way he wanted.**

**"****Like**_**this**_**," he said irritably. He seized his left ear and pulled. His whole head swung off his neck and fell onto his shoulder as if it was on a hinge. Someone had obviously tried to behead him, but not done it properly. Looking pleased at the stunned looks on their faces,-"**

"Revolted, more like," Molly muttered.

"-**Nearly Headless Nick flipped his head back onto his neck, coughed, and said, "So — new Gryffindors! I hope you're going to help us win the house championship this year? Gryffindors have never gone so long without winning. Slytherins have got the cup six years in a row! The Bloody Baron's becoming almost unbearable — he's the Slytherin ghost.""**

"He's so cool too!" Freddie grinned.

"I think he's quite scary actually," Lucy said, scratching her leg.

"I was scared of him too," Ginny admitted.

"He's harmless. It's not like he can do anything," Louis rubbed his cheek. In fact, he used to be scared of The Baron. But he wouldn't say that.

"**Harry looked over at the Slytherin table and saw a horrible ghost sitting there, with blank staring eyes, a gaunt face, and robes stained with silver blood."**

"He's not hard to be scared of," Ginny said. Harry patted her hand absently. "I know, I know, dear," he said, but this didn't appear to be what Ginny wanted him to say, for she rudely presented two fingers at him.

"Mum!" James looked open mouthed at his mother, who simply winked at him. "You're still not allowed to swear," she told him. James scowled and muttered under his breath.

"**He was right next to Malfoy who, Harry was pleased to see, didn't look too pleased with the seating arrangements.**

**"****How did he get covered in blood?" asked Seamus with great interest." **Freddie, Roxanne, Teddy, the young Potters and even Lucy and Rose looked up in interest.

"**"****I've never asked," said Nearly Headless Nick delicately." **And all of their shoulders noticeably sagged when they realised they'd still not get an answer. Harry was very tempted to brag about how he knew, but refrained when he considered how much they'd nag him, and how it was a serious story which he didn't want to use to be annoying.

"**When everyone had eaten as much as they could, the remains of the food faded from the plates, leaving them sparkling clean as before. A moment later the desserts appeared. Blocks of ice cream in every flavour you could think of, apple pies, treacle tarts, chocolate éclairs and jam doughnuts, trifle, strawberries, jelly, rice pudding…" **

James began pretending to drool, until Dominique kicked him.

**"As Harry helped himself to a treacle tart, the talk turned to their families.**

**"****I'm half-and-half," said Seamus. "Me dad's a Muggle. Mam didn't tell him she was a witch 'til after they were married. Bit of a nasty shock for him."**

**The others laughed.**

**"****What about you, Neville?" said Ron.**

**"****Well, my gran brought me up and she's a witch," said Neville, "but the family thought I was all-Muggle for ages."**

"Why, where's his parents?" Rose asked. The adults exchanged glances. The children presumably would learn about when Harry had, back in, what, fifth year? Fourth year? Fourth year. And while Lucy and those older than her, and maybe Lily, possibly Roxanne, would be able to understand the gravity of it, Hugo and Freddie were quite immature. Harry was again having doubts about what the young ones would be reading.

"You'll find out, love," Ron said. Rose didn't look pleased with hearing this yet again, but let it lie.

"**My Great Uncle Algie kept trying to catch me off my guard and force some magic out of me — he pushed me off the end of Blackpool pier once, I nearly drowned —"**

"What?" Molly interrupted. She looked scandalised. "But that's awful! He could have killed him!"

Hermione frowned; she thought it slightly barbaric too, but could see where he was coming from. "If Neville were in that much danger, I'm sure his family would have saved him, but his magic would have too."

"Yes," Molly said, somewhat impatiently, "But magic should come out on its own terms; it can't be forced out! They could have really damaged Professor Longbottom psychologically!"

As Hermione actually agreed with Molly, yet had began by arguing with her, she wasn't sure how to reply, but Ron saved her by reading on.

"**-but nothing happened until I was eight. Great Uncle Algie came round for dinner, and he was hanging me out of an upstairs window by the ankles-"**

Molly made a noise of disgust.

"-** when my Great Auntie Enid offered him a meringue and he accidentally let go. But I bounced — all the way down the garden and into the road. They were all really pleased, Gran was crying, she was so happy."**

Like her sister, Lucy made a noise of disgust. "They ought to be fine with him being wizard or squib," she said stubbornly.

"**And you should have seen their faces when I got in here — they thought I might not be magic enough to come, you see. Great Uncle Algie was so pleased he bought me my toad.""**

James and Louis looked at each other and snorted.

"**On Harry's other side, Percy Weasley and Hermione were talking about lessons-"**

"Of course they are," said George.

"**-("I**_**do**_**hope they start right away, there's so much to learn, I'm particularly interested in Transfiguration,****you know, turning something into something else, of course, it's supposed to be very difficult —"; "You'll be starting small, just matches into needles and that sort of thing — ").**

**Harry, who was starting to feel warm and sleepy, looked up at the High Table again. Hagrid was drinking deeply from his goblet. Professor McGonagall was talking to Professor Dumbledore. Professor Quirrell, in his absurd turban, was talking to a teacher with greasy black hair, a hooked nose, and sallow skin."**

Harry took a moment to remember the teacher who had loved his mother since they first met. It pained him to realise that it would take seven books for the younger ones to understand why Severus Snape was so brave and brilliant; it was a shame they'd only see him as a git while he was saving Harry's life.

"**It happened very suddenly. The hook-nosed teacher looked past Quirrell's turban straight into Harry's eyes — and a sharp, hot pain shot across the scar on Harry's forehead.**

**"****Ouch!" Harry clapped a hand to his head.**

**"****What is it?" asked Percy.**

**"****N-nothing."**

**The pain had gone as quickly as it had come. Harder to shake off was the feeling Harry had gotten from the teacher's look — a feeling that he didn't like Harry at all."**

Harry snorted. "Just a little."

"**"****Who's that teacher talking to Professor Quirrell?" he asked Percy.**

**"****Oh, you know Quirrell already, do you? No wonder he's looking so nervous, that's Professor Snape."**

"As in, Severus?" James asked.

"How many other Snapes do we know?" Albus asked him.

"Just checking."

"**He teaches Potions, but he doesn't want to — everyone knows he's after Quirrell's job. Knows an awful lot about the Dark Arts, Snape."**

**Harry watched Snape for a while, but Snape didn't look at him again.**

**At last, the desserts too disappeared, and Professor Dumbledore got to his feet again. The hall fell silent.**

**"****Ahem — just a few more words now that we are all fed and watered.****I have a few start-of-term notices to give you.**

**"****First years should note that the forest on the grounds is forbidden to all pupils."**

George smirked. "Yeah, Harry, Ron, Hermione. And Ginny," he added, as an afterthought.

" **And a few of our older students would do well to remember that as well."**

**Dumbledore's twinkling eyes flashed in the direction of the Weasley twins."**

Ginny raised her eyebrows at George. "Sorry, you were saying?"

"**"****I have also been asked by Mr Filch, the caretaker, to remind you all that no magic should be used between classes in the corridors.**

**"****Quidditch trials will be held in the second week of the term. Anyone interested in playing for their house teams should contact Madam Hooch.**

**"****And finally, I must tell you that this year, the third-floor corridor on the right-hand side is out of bounds to everyone who does not wish to die a very painful death.""**

James and Teddy both laughed, but no one else did. The younger ones all looked a mixture of confused and interested.

"**Harry laughed, but he was one of the few who did.**

**"****He's not serious?"****he muttered to Percy.**

**"****Must be," said Percy, frowning at Dumbledore. "It's odd, because he usually gives us a reason why we're not allowed to go somewhere — the forest's full of dangerous beasts, everyone knows that. I do think he might have told us prefects, at least.""**

"Ahh, good old Perce." George shook his head, "Our dear prefects do always know best," he said in a pompous manner.

"Ought to know exactly what's going on in order to assist and manage the non-elite of the school," James continued in the same fashion.

"Taking the slack from the professors and keeping the entire school shipshape and perfectly – sorry, _prefectly_ - safe." Louis finished.

"**"****And now, before we go to bed, let us sing the school song!" cried Dumbledore. Harry noticed that the other teachers' smiles had become rather fixed."**

"What! But we're brilliant singers!" George protested.

"Not the song," Victoire groaned. Teddy laughed and whispered something into her ear.

"**Dumbledore gave his wand a little flick, as if he was trying to get a fly off the end, and a long golden ribbon flew out of it, which rose high above the tables and twisted itself, snakelike, into words.**

**"****Everyone pick their favourite tune," said Dumbledore, "and off we go!"**

**And the school bellowed:" **Ron paused and looked around. Other than the nearly second years, everyone seemed ready to sing along too. And so they all sang, (with Hugo, Lily, Freddie and Roxanne mumbling the bits they didn't know),**"**_**Hogwarts, Hogwarts, Hoggy Warty Hogwarts,**_

_**Teach us something please,**_

_**Whether we be old and bald**_

_**Or young with scabby knees,**_

_**Our heads could do with filling**_

_**With some interesting stuff,**_

_**For now they're bare and full of air,**_

_**Dead flies and bits of fluff,**_

_**So teach us things worth knowing,**_

_**Bring back what we've forgot,**_

_**Just do your best, we'll do the rest,**_

_**And learn until our brains all rot.""**_

It was James and Louis who sang together and very slowly, so they finished off the song, but bloody hell, that's what Fred and George had done and this reading was bringing back the memories for George, and that stung. He wished it didn't.

"**Everybody finished the song at different times. At last, only the Weasley twins were left singing along to a very slow funeral march."**

Louis and James looked at each other and grinned; doing the same as Uncle Fred and Uncle George was definitely good in their books.

"**Dumbledore conducted their last few lines with his wand and when they had finished, he was one of those who clapped loudest." **

George smiled. He missed the great wizard; Dumbledore seemed to encourage Fred and George's practical jokes and showed great mirth at the many reasons which caused the twins to find themselves, yet again, sitting in front of him in his office.

**""****Ah, music," he said, wiping his eyes. "A magic beyond all we do here! And now, bedtime. Off you trot!"**

**The Gryffindor first years followed Percy through the chattering crowds, out of the Great Hall, and up the marble staircase. Harry's legs were like lead again, but only because he was so tired and full of food. He was too sleepy even to be surprised that the people in the portraits along the corridors whispered and pointed as they passed, or that twice Percy led them through doorways hidden behind sliding panels and hanging tapestries."**

"If you'd paid attention you wouldn't have gotten so lost every day," Hermione sighed.

"That would be boring," Harry countered.

"**They climbed more staircases, yawning and dragging their feet, and Harry was just wondering how much farther they had to go when they came to a sudden halt.**

**A bundle of walking sticks was floating in midair ahead of them, and as Percy took a step toward them they started throwing themselves at him."**

"Peeves!" George cheered. Freddie also cheered, but no one else did – it seemed he was only decent towards Freddie.

"**"****Peeves," Percy whispered to the first years. "A poltergeist." He raised his voice, "Peeves — show yourself."**

**A loud, rude sound, like the air being let out of a balloon, answered.**

**"****Do you want me to go to the Bloody Baron?""**

"He sounds like Dad... 'Do you want me to tell your mother?'" Ginny imitated.

"Sounds like Hermione, more like," George grumbled, remembering the Skiving Snackboxes incident in his final year. Hermione shot him an unusually wicked smirk.

"**There was a pop, and a little man with wicked, dark eyes and a wide mouth appeared, floating cross-legged in the air, clutching the walking sticks.**

**"****Oooooooh!" he said, with an evil cackle. "Ickle Firsties! What fun!""**

"You have to admit," James said impressively, "The poltergeist has a very good point."

"James," Ginny sighed, "Don't antagonise the first years."

"I'm not promising anything."

"**He swooped suddenly at them. They all ducked.**

**"****Go away, Peeves, or the Baron'll hear about this, I mean it!" barked Percy.**

**Peeves stuck out his tongue and vanished, dropping the walking sticks on Neville's head. They heard him zooming away, rattling coats of armour as he passed.**

**"****You want to watch out for Peeves," said Percy, as they set off again. "The Bloody Baron's the only one who can control him, he won't even listen to us prefects."**

"Bloody hell," George said, bemused, "He's only been a prefect a day! I forgot how bloody pompous he used to be."

"Hey!" Molly and Lucy both cried, trying to defend their father. George held up his hands in surrender. "I said 'used to be'!"

" **Here we are."**

**At the very end of the corridor hung a portrait of a very fat woman in a pink silk dress.**

**"****Password?" she said.**

**"****Caput Draconis,"****said Percy, and the portrait swung forward to reveal a round hole in the wall. They all scrambled through it — Neville needed a leg up —"**

"Bless him," Roxanne grinned.

**"-and found themselves in the Gryffindor common room, a cosy, round room full of squashy armchairs.**

**Percy directed the girls through one door to their dormitory and the boys through another. At the top of a spiral staircase — they were obviously in one of the towers — they found their beds at last: five four-posters hung with deep red, velvet curtains. Their trunks had already been brought up. Too tired to talk much, they pulled on their pyjamas and fell into bed.**

**"****Great food, isn't it?" Ron muttered to Harry through the hangings. "Get**_**off**_**, Scabbers! He's chewing my sheets.""**

Rose wondered briefly what had happened to Scabbers, for he was never mentioned, but decided that he simply must have died and not mattered enough to have the memory brought up.

"**Harry was going to ask Ron if he'd had any of the treacle tart,- **Mate, we're not all that obsessed with the stuff -** but he fell asleep almost at once.**

**Perhaps Harry had eaten a bit too much, because he had a very strange dream. He was wearing Professor Quirrell's turban, which kept talking to him,-"**

"As they always do," Scorpius muttered.

**"-telling him he must transfer to Slytherin at once, because it was his destiny. Harry told the turban he didn't want to be in Slytherin; it got heavier and heavier; he tried to pull it off but it tightened painfully — and there was Malfoy, laughing at him as he struggled with it — then Malfoy turned into the hook-nosed teacher, Snape, whose laugh became high and cold — there was a burst of green light and Harry woke, sweating and shaking."**

"That's pretty weird, Dad," James shook his head. The adults, Victoire and Teddy, however, either had strong suspicions or knew what was in Harry's dream, and so treated the dream with much more sobriety.

**He rolled over and fell asleep again, and when he woke next day, he didn't remember the dream at all. **That's it." Ron closed the book.

* * *

><p><strong>*So, in The Sorcerer's Stone, Dean Thomas is mentioned here. Isn't in The Philosopher's Stone, so I removed it, and have realised loads of things I've never noticed were changed, so I'm changing the rest at the best of my ability. Also, in the American version, does it then not say that there were three people, and then lists Dean Thomas, Lisa Turpin, Ron Weasley and Blaise Zabini? <strong>

**Urm, yes, it's been a while since the last proper chapter. And in my defence... I've got no defence. Dreadfully sorry, fellas. **


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